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[NBDad]

Blah...just blah.

Despite my best efforts, I found out today my oldest son will be repeating a grade. The first half of the year his mother spent dragging him over the city (into 3 separate school zones no less) meant the damage done to his knowledge was unrecoverable this year.

I feel bad for him, luckily he's not the only one from his class running into those difficulties, so he won't be alone at least.

For those of you who have been following my little rants, there's other news.

She (the ex) returned to the province, I had submitted a court motion to have the agreement we had made back in February made official, however her lawyer was not able to reach her to get authorization to sign off.

Surprisingly, she's still trying to fight me over custody, against the advice of her lawyer no less. (He's legal aid, so he gets paid no matter what, but meh).

Judge basically ruled for sole custody to me, access to her, pending a final hearing in November. (Yep, if she's still being unreasonable, I'm going to be in the 5% that make it to trial). Assessment is done, or supposed to be done, but I haven't received word yet on what it says. She's apparently "wanting to participate" now...that makes 3 times? 4? she's said that and has failed to follow through.

Anyway, she doesn't have proper accommodations to take the kids for the full time under the existing order (she has a ONE bedroom apartment, my lawyer basically gave her the choice of do days, do 2 kids/weekend or we go back to court). She chose to exercise just 5 hours of access/week. (ONE day visits).

In other news, CRA has taken 5 months to render a decision on my latest application to have the CCTB reflect the latest developments. (Of course, she refuses to call them, and has collected the payments for the last 2 months quite willingly).

It got to the point I had to involve my local MP to have it expedited. (CRA LOST the application and supporting docs I sent via registered mail, and then proceeded to give me the run around for 6 weeks, only to FIND them again 11 weeks later, and then backdate the entry in their system, wiping out reference to the second application I sent via fax in the process).

So for anyone having issues with the CRA and the CCTB/UCCB applications, if you call your MP they actually have a Member of Parliament Resolution Agent that has the authority to expedite requests. Mine is currently marked "URGENT" from what I am told.

Other than that the children are currently doing well, things FINALLY appear to be stable. From what the overpaid lawyer tells me, she doesn't have a hope in hell of getting custody back. She'll wind up with access, but how much is totally up in the air.

[blinkandimgone]

Is it possible your son could make up some time in summer school or work with a tutor over the summer? You can find out from the school board if there is a way for him to make up some learning and get tested prior to the new school year to have him placed in the proper grade.

On the CCTB issue, I'm going through some stuff to get CCTB re-instated and someone here suggested going to city hall and swearing an affidavit if the ex refused to sign his side of the papers, I verifies with CRA and they said yes that would be acceptable - perhaps that would help you as well?

[NBDad]

Well, a FULL YEAR after it was ordered by the court, the assessor's report finally got completed this week. 3300 dollar bill later, we have it in hand and it's filed with the courts.

End result...recommendation of sole to me, supervised access 4 hours/week for her. (Until she completes a parenting assessment).

She was planning on taking them for a trip to visit her mother for a week. Once we had the report, the lawyer put the kibosh on that one.

I swear I haven't seen the overpaid little guy this excited yet...he's straight out bitch slapping her lawyer to get her to agree to sign a final order.

Unfortunately we're having to move, the rental we are in is being renovated and placed on the market, and I'm not in a position to purchase it. So we're moving (close by...good), but outside the current school zone (not so good). However the new place is a LOT bigger (and HER lawyer was complaining about the size of the current spot, so this is good), and the new school seems to be a much better one than their old one.

My lawyer is confident we'll get a final order soon....though personally I am not holding my breath.

[dadtotheend]

Way to go dude. You da man.

Don't hold your breath on the final order yet. The other side will still try and pull a rabbit out of a hat. Just keep pushing towards trial and they will cave.

[InterprovincialParents]

Congratulations...is there an end closer in sight now?

[NBDad]

Nope, it's still dragging on....I have a "final hearing" scheduled for 3 days straight in November, but due to the recommendations in the assessor's report being so very different from the interim order + the changes agreed to by the lawyers AND her refusing to even consider or offer any alternatives....we're going back to court (again) on Sept 15.

Basically the last court order gave her 3 days a week until school started, then 2 days (Sat/Sun) with the caveat she had to have appropriate accommodations for the kids. (to the satisfaction of MY lawyer)....It wound up she had a ONE bedroom apartment at the time. (For her, the latest flavor and all 4 kids). So just...no...wasn't going to fly.

My lawyer basically gave her the choice of doing JUST days (sat/sun), doing 2 kids/night, or going back to court.

She chose......5 1/2 hours a week (on Sunday).

Yep, after making a huge stink and trying to play the poor me card in court, she made the decision to only see the kids for a single day.

To make things worse, so far, she's kept approx. 30% of the scheduled visits, and either canceled or rescheduled the remainder. With it being Summer I've tried to be accommodating to her work schedule (not that the kids are seeing the fruits of THAT labor, but don't get me started).

Anyway, once the report came in (as she decided NOT to participate) we've been trying (unsuccessfully) to keep to the recommendations.

Problem is that she won't budge on the access, and refuses to offer any alternatives to the existing schedule. (Despite the fact that HER lawyer was the one that picked the "expert", now that said expert has recommended sole custody to me, and supervised visitation to her...they're unwilling to accept the report.)

Not much more I can do except keep trucking, the longer this goes on, the worse off she's going to be. At best she's looking at 5 1/2 hours every other weekend, at worst....supervised visits.

[ONdad]

Hang in there. You're doing the right thing for your kids.

[dadtotheend]

Originally Posted by ONdad

Hang in there. You're doing the right thing for your kids.

He will, and he will prevail.

[NBDad]

As long as I live, I won't understand her....

We have court in two days to try and get a ruling on making the assessor's recommendations work with the existing order....yesterday was the LAST access day she had prior to the court day....she canceled it because she "had to work".

She keeps complaining she wants MORE time...yet refuses to exercise the limited access she's chosen....

Out of the last 17 possible visits....she's kept 6 of them.....

It sucks for the kids...and I feel bad for them....but the crap my NJ pulls just boggles my mind....

[dadtotheend]

My ex does the same thing. In over two years since we settled, she has blown off lots and lots of her access.

She wants the Rockwell painting to show a really nice white picket fence. But she doesn't want to maintain it.