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Old 09-09-2010, 03:56 PM
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Heya everyone!

A quick intro for anyone who cares....

Gary M here, a military guy who is putting down roots in Ottawa so my kids can, for the 1st time in their lives, enjoy some stability.

Divorce finalized 1 July 2010

Both kids (14 & 15) live with me

Non-working Mom moved home to Saskatchewan

I haven't asked for CS, nor the extra expenses, and I have paid 100% of the travel costs for them to visit her. I don't need her money and want her to be able to afford to spoil them when they visit.

She hasn't (until this week) asked for SS (the Agreement provides for $1000/month for 5 years). Separation agreement was rock-solid and drafted with the anticipation of her having the kids, but situation changed when the kids were given a choice and they chose, well, they chose "not her." Anway, she's just filed for SS back dated to Day 1 (18 months or so now), and doesn't seem to care that this will automatically set her up for a CS nightmare.

Ex occasionally goes off on a fit and does Dumb Things that send me into a panic because I can see landing in court and spending hundreds of kilodollars just to maintain status quo. Her latest stunts all appear to be aimed at causing me to lose the house (I just bought) so the kids will be forced to move to SK with her. They currently do not want to move back with her under any circumstances (this may change, of course) and so I have to fight for them (not for custody, but rather "on their behalf") now, and for the first time. I'm terrified.

I was turned on to this site by a gentleman named Ken S who is, apparently, active here and in a paternal rights organization.

I look forward to burning the midnight oil while reading through the forums for information. To those of you who have lived the nightmare, thank you for sharing your experience and wisdom here. I hope to be able to pay it forward.

OK, I've some reading to do before barraging you with questions. I need to find out about imputing income, varying the agreement, and finding ways to stop the madness. Wish me luck!

Again, thanks for sharing - I'm glad I was pointed in this direction.

Cheers!

Gary
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Old 09-09-2010, 04:00 PM
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Welcome!!
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Old 09-09-2010, 06:49 PM
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Welcome to forums... If you need any answers regarding interprovincial, ask away we help where we can
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Old 09-09-2010, 10:47 PM
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Welcome.

From what you mentioned, home base advantage prevails in your potential dispute. Surely, they can be reasonable and resolve settlement.
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Old 09-09-2010, 11:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by logicalvelocity View Post
Welcome.

From what you mentioned, home base advantage prevails in your potential dispute. Surely, they can be reasonable and resolve settlement.
You are assuming, I think, that the other party is rational. I assure you that she is not

Even when presented with cold, hard numbers illustrating the financial disadvantage to her, she indicated that she intends to pursue the legal route and has been CCing her lawyer on all of our correspondence. I'll come out ahead, substantially I think, in the money department but it's not worth the ass-pain, or the chance of supporting her lawyer's kids. (sigh). I told her that I'd be happy to continue with status-quo, which costs me more but provides for less drama.

My kids (and I) just want this to be over....

Cheers!

Gary
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Old 09-09-2010, 11:07 PM
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On the face of what you say, you shouldn't get too worried about it.

As you say, she "...doesn't seem to care that this will automatically set her up for a CS nightmare".

Let her bring her claim, and ignore it. Let her spend hundreds of kilodollars that she doesn't have while you bide your time. Eventually you spend one kilodollar defending her claim for SS and counterclaiming CS.
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Old 09-09-2010, 11:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dadtotheend View Post
On the face of what you say, you shouldn't get too worried about it.

As you say, she "...doesn't seem to care that this will automatically set her up for a CS nightmare".

Let her bring her claim, and ignore it. Let her spend hundreds of kilodollars that she doesn't have while you bide your time. Eventually you spend one kilodollar defending her claim for SS and counterclaiming CS.
Thanks - that's what I am just now beginning to realize... I ought to quit worrying about losing the house and just let her tilt at windmills 'til she gets tired.

I'm still terrified of the Divorce Industry sending me to the poor house, but, well, worrying about it isn't gonna help.

Cheers!

Gary
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