Joining you all

[devastatedmom]

Hi everyone. I'm a 41 year old mother of 2. My husband of 16 years informed me 6 weeks ago that he's done. No real reason, just he doesn't care anymore. He feels out of control, and he doesn't want to be with me anymore.

I spent 7 years of our marriage, on and off, as a stay at home mom after each child was born. I supported him through his unemployment at least 4 times, and looked after everything, including paying off all his before-marriage debt (car, student loans) when he lost his job 2 months after our wedding. I supported him going back to school twice, and we got out of all his unemployment and retraining without any debt, even if I was at home at the time. I was very frugal and looked after everything so we could avoid debt.

His last retraining was to become a real estate agent. After paying for all the courses he joined an brokerage firm, but he never really got going. I was SAH at that time, but went back to work, as we didn't have any income coming in. He went back to working in an old profession, but kept trying to get the real estate going on the side...which amounts to all the fees that comes to being a RE agent.

Then both of us were working, but the debt kept climbing. I went back to college to get my diploma in the field I am working in, and things got worse as I couldn't be on top of everything anymore, and he didn't bother. We are current on everything, but the debt kept climbing no matter how much I begged him to help me while I tried to finish my studies.

I finished my studies in May, he then informs me he's losing his RE licence as he didn't know he had to take 2 more courses and now there wasn't enough time (had to be done by the end of June). I offered to help him get them done, he says he's done with me and wants out. I'm devastated. After all the years of helping him and supporting him, I have nothing. I don't know how we are going to split everything up or what the support order will be, but I doubt I can keep the house, and I don't know what me and the kids are going to do.

I've been reading here for a week or so, and I'll post some specific questions in the forums soon. Thanks for listening.

[momtohandl]

I'm so sorry you have to go through this..It does not sound fair at all...but sometimes life sucks and all we can do is pick up the pieces right?

I hope you are able to keep your house...my husband and I just bought a new house 4 weeks ago, and then 2 weeks ago he told me we were done..I am angry that we have to deal with the additional burden of this new house...I am angry about a lot of things with him right now...

I hope it gets easier for you!!

Michelle