A caring father fighting in a mother's system...

[InterprovincialParents]

One thing not in the Temporary Order...a jurisdictional clause...i.e., "neither parent shall move residences outside of the jurisdiction of..." "If either parent plans to move outside of the jurisdiction, they must provide 60 days notice to the other parent, and may only do so upon agreement" "Neither party shall unreasonably withhold their consent to a relocation if it is in the child's best interest" etc...

Also, you will want Income tax returns and notices of assessment and reassessment each year.

You will also want to clarify on the telephone (or even webcam access) being private as of X years of age (5 is good for telephone, 8-10 typical for webcams)...otherwise, you may have issues down the road with mom interfering with your access time that way as well...

You will want something in there that requires the mother to provide to any childcare, health or education provider a letter stating that you are also able to contact them and be contacted by them for matters concerning the child. Also add that she provide to schools any Final Orders or Variation Orders as may be necessary through the years.

Lastly, a paragraph that states that neither party shall make plans for the child during the other parent's parenting time. (i.e. you don't get yours because mom promised to take her to her friend's birthday party)..ensure that you still get your time, and that YOU take her
With a 5-yr old, remember that school schedules will change, extra-curriculars will change, etc...

[InterprovincialParents]

If she has not followed orders/agreements in the past, you may also want an enforcement clause, stating that any access missed due to the mother be made up within 7-10 days, at the mother's cost, that any missed by you be made up within 7-10 days at your cost, and that this order be open to re-evaluation should actions hinder your access with the child...allowing you the option to take it back for custody if she messes with access.

[Generation "X" Dad]

Thank you for the suggestions Interprovincial. I am going to bring those up tomorrow when we go back to court to sign the papers. Speaking of, I no longer have internet access at home so I was not able to update this lately to tell you all that my daughter's mother and I were able to come to an agreement with each other before the trial management conference two weeks ago. We go back tomorrow for a settlement conference before a settlement judge to sign the papers because we were not able to on the last day we were at court.

The temporary order is going to stay as it is (I will be suggesting the issue you have mentioned) and the only real change from the Temp Order will be that she will be granted sole custody and I will continue to have large and liberal access. Support is going to stay as it has been calculated (I have basically maxed out my wage here where I work) and if her or I come into a miracle and make more money, we have agreed to re-visit the support issue at that time.

I will also have written in the Final Order the provision of rights of access to information regarding my daughter's healthcare, education and so forth and I plan to provide my daughter's school and caregivers copies of the Final Order.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she doesn't change her mind, but in all reality, her and I cannot afford lawyers and we have neither the time nor the finances to go through a lengthy trial as we would have to represent ourselves throughout the entire process.

I'm just happy that things have finally drawn to a close and I can get on with my life with my daughter and I.

[rwm1273]

Originally Posted by MsD

I don't know why your ex has become so unreasonable - what is her justification for wanting sole custody? How will this in any way benefit your daughter?

She is a woman, and the courts enable her to be difficult.

[rwm1273]

If you had been in the other daughter's life since she was 8m old, why not ask for visitation for her too?