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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 05-17-2015, 08:49 AM
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Originally Posted by OntarioMomma View Post
When I said them I meant it, for better or for worse, but it takes two to keep that promise.
I agree OM, there really is no point in exchanging rings or signing a piece of paper, especially when commitment means different things to different people. Loyalty is a rare virtue nowadays ...
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Old 05-17-2015, 11:53 AM
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My partner said never again. But he also said he would never love another woman. He tells me almost daily "how did you trick me into loving you?" As a joke of course. He was very young when he married and they both had many different ideas of what they wanted from marriage. I never wanted to get married and still have that feeling. If anything it would be for the "legality" of it (har har) because I worry how protected we both are if anything happened to him and that his ex does not agree with us living in sin and projects that onto the kids. He says he just likes the "us" part of it without all the drama, legal stuff, judgement, labels and the like. I have to admit I agree

Good people shouldnt hold themselves back from love though. If you guys were to meet someone who loved you and made you happy, dont let what your exes did stop that. If my partner had turned me away I would have missed out on the man I have been waiting my life for.
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Old 05-17-2015, 01:22 PM
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Good people shouldnt hold themselves back from love though. If you guys were to meet someone who loved you and made you happy, dont let what your exes did stop that. If my partner had turned me away I would have missed out on the man I have been waiting my life for.
Beautifully written ... though I don't think it's a matter of holding back - maybe overly cautious? Many of us in here have been somewhat traumatized by how the Ex's have treated us, followed by the legal BS adding insult to injury. The fear of going through that again can be overwhelming ...

They say love conquers all .... I hope so?
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Old 05-17-2015, 01:38 PM
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It's funny, I am not saying never again because of fear. I am saying "highly unlikely" because of extreme lack of opportunity paired with being particularly selective.

It's Drake's Equation when you get right down to it.
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Old 05-17-2015, 03:24 PM
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I too feel it is "highly unlikely" as I am extremely selective. Since separation in 2009 I think I have met (1) individual who turned my head. Turns out the guy is single, never married and no kids and probably intends to keep it that way. We had contemplated getting together for golf and some bridge but nothing came of it. Apres divorce litigation kept me from being in the mind-set to even consider a date with anyone. Perhaps the future will have something in store for me. I'm not actively looking for anyone. I suspect eligible men my age are married to their TV's or interested in younger women.
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Old 05-17-2015, 03:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janibel View Post
After going through the perils of divorce/family law, would you take the leap of faith and ever get married again?
I intend to get married again hopefully by the age of 40

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Originally Posted by Janibel View Post
Do you feel that your divorce experience has taught you how to be a better spouse in the future - or has it made you fearful of ever trusting again?
Both. So this time I would try to avoid the mistakes I was making then but also gotta do all I can to make sure she is "the one".

@Arabian: Thanks for the laugh with that sentence that you are scared you might bump into someone who is only looking to get hot meal, laundry done etc..LOL
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Old 05-17-2015, 04:06 PM
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^^^I don't blame you at all at your age, go for it.
Arabian makes a good point - for those of us over 50 somethin' who where chained to the kitchen sink, we don't want to go back to a life of servitude. Retirement should be about having fun and exploring all the things you never had time to do before.

I went on a few dates that felt like job interviews ewww ... if it clicks it clicks - I'm in no hurry ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWXNm9b6pKs
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Old 05-17-2015, 04:53 PM
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I went on a date once (perhaps my last). The thing that struck me the most (aside from the earwax and enormous wart in the middle of his face) was how hard I had to work to keep a conversation going. He just sat there with a stupid grin on his face whilst staring at my breasts. I very quickly conjured up excuses as to why I had to leave RIGHT AWAY FAST. The only thing this toad managed to say was how lonely he was, lived with his mother, kids grown. It was dreadful.
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Old 05-17-2015, 05:14 PM
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LMAO!!!Nightmare! My last date was no better, the guy invites me to a very jazzy restaurant so I'm really looking forwards to this date. Long story short he spends the evening telling me all about his health problems - explaining the details of his latest surgery .... bon appetit, yeah right!
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Old 05-17-2015, 08:21 PM
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hahahah you guys are incredible. I couldnt stop laughing @ health problems conversation. Arabian, imagine you marry that guy and live with him then you have a mother in law....he would perhaps prefer you call her mom lol.
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