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General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:00 PM
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Originally Posted by SecondChance View Post
I'll share my story.

I found my ex on this site. He did a very, very long depiction of his take of our divorce case. Literally he posted the day after court.

I must say that his analogy of what happened in court and his interpretation were quite different. And I must say I certainly sound like the 'devil'.

I always look back to see it he has re posted anything because now we are amidst another run through the family law courts over equalization.
Does this really surprise you though. You wouldn't be in court had you agreed on the facts of the matter.
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
It paints a really nice picture of you as a person. If you know what I mean...
He is what he is. Yet no comment from you on the douchebag's actions. I guess what he did is okay with you. It paints a really nice picture of your broken moral scale.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:14 PM
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Originally Posted by DeadBeatDouchebagDad View Post
He is what he is. Yet no comment from you on the douchebag's actions. I guess what he did is okay with you. It paints a really nice picture of your broken moral scale.
Hello, Pot! It's me, Kettle. You're black.


I think that's the point being made here is don't come looking for others to reinforce your poor choices.

You can't expect to get away with calling the other party Douchebag, then wonder why we won't support you in further disparaging the other party.

Did your ex's partner do something right? No, of course not.

But don't expect anyone here to jump up and high five you either, for continuing to disparage them. Bashing ex's new partners doesn't help anyone.
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:17 PM
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Originally Posted by DeadBeatDouchebagDad View Post
He is what he is. Yet no comment from you on the douchebag's actions. I guess what he did is okay with you. It paints a really nice picture of your broken moral scale.
Tayken can observe what you're doing and saying directly, so s/he can comment on it. S/he can't observe what your partner's ex is doing or saying directly, because the only information about that person is filtered through you, and your level of hostility and emotional enmeshment is DefCon 5 high. In other words, you haven't demonstrated that you're a reliable reporter of your step-children's father and his behavior, but you have demonstrated over and over that you have difficulty managing your anger and emotional attachment to this man. Tayken's just commenting on what s/he can observe directly.

Sorry Tayken if I'm misrepresenting you.
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  #25 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:19 PM
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Originally Posted by ByMyself View Post
Hello, Pot! It's me, Kettle. You're black.

I think that's the point being made here is don't come looking for others to reinforce your poor choices.

You can't expect to get away with calling the other party Douchebag, then wonder why we won't support you in further disparaging the other party.

Did your ex's partner do something right? No, of course not.

But don't expect anyone here to jump up and high five you either, for continuing to disparage them. Bashing ex's new partners doesn't help anyone.
Hello TANGENT, I'm IRRELEVANT.
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  #26 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:21 PM
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Hello TANGENT, I'm IRRELEVANT.

Got that right.
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:33 PM
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Originally Posted by stripes View Post
Tayken can observe what you're doing and saying directly, so s/he can comment on it. S/he can't observe what your partner's ex is doing or saying directly, because the only information about that person is filtered through you, and your level of hostility and emotional enmeshment is DefCon 5 high. In other words, you haven't demonstrated that you're a reliable reporter of your step-children's father and his behavior, but you have demonstrated over and over that you have difficulty managing your anger and emotional attachment to this man. Tayken's just commenting on what s/he can observe directly.

Sorry Tayken if I'm misrepresenting you.
Tayken is a police officer called in to investigate a domestic violence call. He speaks to the victim who is crying in the corner and beside herself with rage towards her attacker. Tayken hears her wailing and he tells the victim to stop using profanities towards her attacker because it paints a negative view of the victim's personality.

No comment about the assault Officer Tayken?
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 12:36 PM
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Originally Posted by ByMyself View Post
Got that right.
Which is more than you got right in your rambling post.
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 01:02 PM
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Tayken can observe what you're doing and saying directly, so s/he can comment on it. S/he can't observe what your partner's ex is doing or saying directly, because the only information about that person is filtered through you, and your level of hostility and emotional enmeshment is DefCon 5 high. In other words, you haven't demonstrated that you're a reliable reporter of your step-children's father and his behavior, but you have demonstrated over and over that you have difficulty managing your anger and emotional attachment to this man. Tayken's just commenting on what s/he can observe directly.
Extremely well said Stripes.

The most bizarre thing is how high the emotional attachment is considering that the person he's disparaging isn't even his ex. Its very weird.

Its concerning to consider the level of stress these kids are under having to suffer this level of hostility from a caregiver. Tragic.
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old 01-31-2014, 01:06 PM
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I'll share my story.

I found my ex on this site. He did a very, very long depiction of his take of our divorce case. Literally he posted the day after court.

I must say that his analogy of what happened in court and his interpretation were quite different. And I must say I certainly sound like the 'devil'.
I'm sure that my ex would have a differing version of his court appearances too that would be related to how the family law system is biased to favor women and that I got away with everything.

Your post is a good reminder that both parties will have a much different perspective of events though.
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