Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > General Chat

General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 12:08 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Bc
Posts: 225
undersc0re is on a distinguished road
Default Single parent forced by seniority to work afh

I understand this is a divorce forum, I was wondering if someone could point me to a good site, or direction on being forced to work 1500 km away from home with 7 days to report....the union says our seniority is sacred, we will try to find a way to accomodate you, but your impacting another employee senior to you, I am a single parent trying to work through life, with a nanny helping out as the job is already on call type. I might get some time to work my issues out and figure something out, but I would have to move my kids schools and activities etc, not to mention get permission from the exwife, she doesnt see them much anyhow. The employer might push me towards another position I am told, just wondering legally where I sit, its hard to find solid information on this, it is a federally regulated job/company, I feel I may be treated a little differently as a single father than a single mother would be. i already had to spill the beans on my private life, although not all of it yet. I am in a position as well where I need income for the house nanny and kids, no income from the deadbeat mom coming in, I can not sell my house yet because of complications.....sticky situation for me...good paying job I dont really want to walk away from. I would feel guilty leaving my kids with the nanny for long periods of time even if I was promised time to come back and visit regularly, the position would be anywhere from 2 months and up to maybe a year or little more at most. I am assuming its almost an if you dont like it leave situation....I hear of so many single moms getting away with things, there must be something.
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 12:49 PM
Banned
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 217
Once.is.enough is on a distinguished road
Default

How old are children?
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 01:17 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Bc
Posts: 225
undersc0re is on a distinguished road
Default

2 girls, 6 and 16. I really have no options other than the nanny who thank,gawd is my sister....which maybe in combination with me being a man makes it easier to leave my children.....I know its a bad thing to assume, but I feel maybe me being a man makes it a little different, I feel better leaving my children with my sister than some stranger......still not right.
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 01:25 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,347
Beachnana is on a distinguished road
Default

Sole or joint custody?

Scheduled access for ncp parent?

Does ncp parent utilize access?

Would Mom object to the move?

You would likely have to seek a court approved move if she did.

In which case you would need to prove that the move is in the best interest of the children, that you would facilitate equal time access for Mom.

Get a lawyer, because as Tayken has stated quite often mobility issues are complicated.
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 01:44 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Bc
Posts: 225
undersc0re is on a distinguished road
Default

The mother would not show up in court, easiest and cheapest, quickest way we got shared custody with me being primary care and control.
There is no visitation schedule set up at all, the mother has seen her kids 4 times now in 9 months for one or 2 days at a time.
She would object the move, just because thats the way she is. The young one is involved in activities, long term, the other girl has just settled down from the messy split up. I would not want to move them right now, although it may be necessary.
Reply With Quote
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 02:07 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,347
Beachnana is on a distinguished road
Default

So you do not want to move the children as you have stated they are just settling down. And it looks like you would likely not have much problem acquiring the permission from a judge to move but you do not want to move.

Your struggle is with the union related to your job for ing a move.

Read your employment contract that you have ( if you do have). If you have agreed to relocation, then you most likely will not be successful in challenging this. Can you approach the other person in the seniority that you will affect and see if they can accommodate your need to stay put?

You could go to the labour board if you have cause to believe this is an attempt to either push you out of your job or change your job, knowing your personal situation and that you would find it difficult to move.
Reply With Quote
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 02:31 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Bc
Posts: 225
undersc0re is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
So you do not want to move the children as you have stated they are just settling down. And it looks like you would likely not have much problem acquiring the permission from a judge to move but you do not want to move.

Your struggle is with the union related to your job for ing a move.

Read your employment contract that you have ( if you do have). If you have agreed to relocation, then you most likely will not be successful in challenging this. Can you approach the other person in the seniority that you will affect and see if they can accommodate your need to stay put?

You could go to the labour board if you have cause to believe this is an attempt to either push you out of your job or change your job, knowing your personal situation and that you would find it difficult to move.
Yes the union would like to protect its members seniority to the extent possible, I have no idea if they have helped others in my same position or not. I would sell the home if I could, unfortunately its going to be a long battle. I will just look into forcing the sale of my home asap, and get the ok to move the children from this area....just by the time I do this through courts, the forcing might be over with....
Reply With Quote
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 02:49 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,347
Beachnana is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by undersc0re View Post
Yes the union would like to protect its members seniority to the extent possible, I have no idea if they have helped others in my same position or not. I would sell the home if I could, unfortunately its going to be a long battle. I will just look into forcing the sale of my home asap, and get the ok to move the children from this area....just by the time I do this through courts, the forcing might be over with....
Sorry you lost me on the last sentence. What forcing might be over with? Your job.

If you have to go in the interim, then go, make plans for the care of your children, go to work,and use all the media available to stay in contact.

Then work on the arrangements/ consent to move, selling the house etc.

The important element is to discuss with your children what they want. The oldest is able to express themselves surely.

In the end, if you need to get another job, which might pay less, so,you can give,the children what they need, then do it. Money cannot rule your life.
Reply With Quote
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 03:17 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Bc
Posts: 225
undersc0re is on a distinguished road
Default

One of 3 parties involved with ownership of the home is playing games with me wanting to sell it they want to delay it so I pay off more of the mortgage and they get more money as well as the person is a little crazy in the head, it might cause a long court battle, by the time that issue is resolved and I find a new place to live with the ok to move the children, my seniority may hold where I am right now. I guess they don't have to divulge any information on other similar cases to mine they have dealt with....my childcare person I have right now has told me they really don't want to be a full time mom if I get forced away for a month or so, she has no problem watching my children fulltime for as much as a month, but after that she would not want the full time mom job. That is my concern.

I will just do what I can and move along, if my over use of my current nanny drives her to quit while I do what I can for now, then definetly, I have no choice, I will quit and do the 9 to 5 mon-fri thing as a single parent, if I have no choice. I just wanted to keep this job to pay for university and kids activities in future...Hopefully I can make something work! Thx.
Reply With Quote
  #10 (permalink)  
Old 07-06-2014, 03:35 PM
Rioe's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,245
Rioe will become famous soon enough
Default

Your family status (ie, parenting responsibilities) must be accommodated by your employer.

See: Discrimination on the Basis of Family Status
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Parental alienation: Cdn. study - 1989-2008 kidsRworthit Parenting Issues 10 11-26-2012 03:24 PM
Why 'shared' custody? sasha1 Political Issues 35 07-01-2010 01:17 AM
Co-parenting ----post divorce bearall Parenting Issues 14 05-25-2010 12:14 PM
sick kids & time off work... mcr Parenting Issues 1 12-15-2008 02:48 PM
How credibility is affected in the eyes of Judges. gooddadgoingmad Divorce & Family Law 12 03-12-2006 04:05 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:57 PM.