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General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 12:18 PM
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Your advice works both ways. You can ignore. You can avoid her posts. You gave your opinion in her initial posts. Then you have proceeded to continue to hammer her in separate posts asking new questions. Funny, you're a bit of an expert in hearsay comments with your ex but instead of simply answering, you had to go into the previous argument and hammer her on previous decisions. A simple "hearsay in affidavits is seen as x by judges" would have sufficed. Continuing into previous issues and statements was unnecessary. You're smarter than this!

As for other posters attacking you, don't give them more fodder.

The two of you are wrong and starting a thread to get people to defend your behaviour isn't really helpful. Move on.

I say the same to Angie. Stop encouraging a useless argument that solves nothing. Agree to disagree. If neither of you like what the other has to say, stop responding. Its exhausting!


Agreed, I will ignore.


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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 12:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
Agreed, I will ignore.
I don't think it will happen. You are easily baited. Something you need to work on if you should ever hit the stand. A qualified barrister would have a field day with your need to be detailed.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 12:54 PM
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Funny, you're a bit of an expert in hearsay comments with your ex but instead of simply answering, you had to go into the previous argument and hammer her on previous decisions.
I'll admit that I'm baffled by her case. Her kids deserve better than this high conflict court stuff over a measly few percentages of increase.

I have good intensions Rock....you know that. I'm not the bad guy starting arguments...sorry if that's all you see. I'm the good guy trying to encourage settlement outside of court over a rather small issue.

Quote:
The two of you are wrong and starting a thread to get people to defend your behaviour isn't really helpful. Move on.
I started this thread to address personal attacks by S&T and nothing more. C'mon Rock..this wasn't a bait for her. She drops by to discuss her case...so I thought I would.

I'm starting to realize that she's going the high conflict, litigation route no matter what I say ..... but please don't hate on me for trying to encourage settlement...for the kids sake. That's doesn't make me bad and annoying.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 04-11-2017 at 12:57 PM.
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 01:07 PM
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Let it go. There is a judge who will decide the case. You dont need to.
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  #25 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Let it go. There is a judge who will decide the case. You dont need to.
Yea...my hope was that I might spark something in her to realize trying out an equal, shared parenting regime before WAR isn't the worst idea in the world.

I wasn't expecting this much kickback (strangely by not one father) but it is what it is. She wants to pull the kids into a dramatic, exhausting warzone over a little access increase.....so that's that. I just feel for the kids .. like I said...good intensions.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 04-11-2017 at 01:24 PM.
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  #26 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 01:57 PM
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Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
I wasn't expecting this much kickback (strangely by not one father) but it is what it is. She wants to pull the kids into a dramatic, exhausting warzone over a little access increase.....so that's that. I just feel for the kids .. like I said...good intensions.
For the record, I'm a father to three kids, and gave you some kickback, so nothing to do with gender here.
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 02:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Soiled View Post
For the record, I'm a father to three kids, and gave you some kickback, so nothing to do with gender here.
Ahh yes..my bad. I actually really enjoy your posts. You've followed my threads for quite a while.

I agree that I can get passionate about disallowing equal parenting for crap reasons, although I'm surprised that more haven't discouraged high conflict court litigation over a little increase in access.

There are terrible parents out there (abusive, addictions, pops in and out of child's life, etc.). and not so terrible ones. He sounds like a not-so-terrible one....and he's been there, has a healthy environment. He's earned his right to parent equally in my opinion.

But I can see the poster is choosing to drag the kids, ex and finances through this stinky, swampy court system .... hey ... I tried.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 04-11-2017 at 02:31 PM.
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 02:30 PM
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Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Turning peeps against you wasn't my motivation. I could care less about who's on what side. Usually it's boy vs girl here which is sad .. but whatever. Having 2 loving parents equally involved in your children's lives was. I see no good reason you wont allow that.
I shouldn't be chiming into this post but I ate my lunch too fast and have nothing better to do.

LF, I'm neutral. I never really read much of your threads because they were as long as the OJ trial and I have the attention span of a gnat. But you seem like a nice enough guy who, like many of us, have been beat up by the family law system. So I get your vexation.

But its actually not at all true that its usually male vs female on this site. Its usually women-hating-men vs everyone else....or non-working litigant vs everyone else....or woman-trying-to-unfairly-deny-access vs everyone else. The way this forum breaks down is FAR more complex than what you describe.

I'm female and never side with anyone based on gender.

You also seem to think you're the champion for fair access in parental rights and frankly, you came very late to that crusade. You're giving yourself credit where none is due because this site has been pro-equal parental access for as long as I've been here. I can't think of one regular poster who isn't for fair access unless there's valid reason for one parent not having it.

The issue that you're not comprehending is that you (and some of the other more extreme posters here), see everyone else's case only through the lens of your own experience. You think because you went through something with your ex...that you perceive as unfair...that every other case (and often every other woman) is like that. As such, I've had instances where I've posted...and because I'm female...I'm had women-haters jumping down my throat without even reading my posts properly. And no, I'm not referencing you...but I saw your posts to Ange in that vein.

Quote:
This thread was not a lure for her. Her case wasn't even brought up. It was about attacking personal characteristics of posters.
Seriously?

The other thread was shut down and you weren't done. That's why you started this thread. That you titled it something different is irrelevant. If you want Ange to own her issues...own yours. You are a classic right-fighter on a crusade....which is why the length of some of your threads rival Tolstoy's War & Peace.

Personally, I agree with your basic premise. Based on what Ange posted, it sounds like fair access with her kid's father is reasonable....which is what I commented on her thread. But ultimately, if she's bringing up idiotic arguments for denying access, the court will see through that anyway. She may have valid evidence, for all I (or you) know, and if she does...the court will consider that also. All you can do is state your point and move along...clearly she believes she has a valid reason to deny more time.

The amount of fury you have over your own situation is poisoning your ability to see other situations as possibly different.

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Try to remember that this is a living site and five years from now someone will be coming for advice and information. Getting into a four page argument off the topic of discussion is not helpful to that person searching for info.
I agree but there's also some entertainment value watching these posts sometimes. I just wish I had packed popcorn in my lunch bag.
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 02:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
LF, I'm neutral. I never really read much of your threads because they were as long as the OJ trial and I have the attention span of a gnat. But you seem like a nice enough guy who, like many of us, have been beat up by the family law system. So I get your vexation.
Aww, thanks for your understanding.

Quote:
You're giving yourself credit where none is due because this site has been pro-equal parental access for as long as I've been here.
Yet nobody is encouraging equal parenting in the case being discussed except for me.

Quote:
Personally, I agree with your basic premise. Based on what Ange posted, it sounds like fair access with her kid's father is reasonable....which is what I commented on her thread. But ultimately, if she's bringing up idiotic arguments for denying access, the court will see through that anyway.
People are scared to agree with me. So thank you PH. Not that I need sidekicks but you're not one to join the swarm (neither am I) and I appreciate that.
I agree that the courts will see though her idiotic arguments. This is all I've been trying to say .. and you summed it up in one sentence without quoting her. I have to be more like you. :-)

Quote:
The other thread was shut down and you weren't done. That's why you started this thread.
No, I started this thread because I don't enjoy my personal life being attacked by S&T. My education, my job with children, etc. This thread had nothing to do with Angie and to be frank I was surprised she stopped by. It was to try and stop S&T's attacks...not to go on with Angie...promise.
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old 04-11-2017, 03:19 PM
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Both of you don't seem to recognize the triggering this subject is causing within your brains.

LF32.....this women's arguments are too much like your ex's. Let it go, point is/was made in the last thread. Proof was in your winning (eventually) over your ex's immoral stance and actions.

And my trigger, lady, get out of your ex's wallet.

And God Forbid you had cheated on your ex, then you would have Links on your case big time.

Just saying.

This site is addictive (I get drawn back every time my greedy ex does sometime that triggers me). I realize that is my problem, although she the one twisting the knife.

Like DTTE (who finally left after getting a g/f), some of you need to forget this site, move on (easy to say) and, stop reliving the f&@king horror that was your divorce.

Your reasons for staying have more to do with a proxy revenge than you know, IMHO.
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