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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2006, 11:01 PM
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I think you're only joking when you repeatedly refer to you as stoopid1, because it's your alias, but be careful about what you say out loud like a mantra...you may believe it after awhile. Be kind to yourself.
In regards to your daughter.I would in no way, shape or form allow her to go without a parent. From what you've said you're the most responsible, so if it means the world to your daughter maybe you could go, or one of your parents? i would not allow my 14 year old to fly to the other side of the world and be at the whim of strangers. Kidnappings are rampant and the human trade for sexslaves is common. All she has to do is walk down the street and get grabbed , put on a boat and you may never hear from her again.
The entire thing sounds fishy. I wouldn't care if it's a multi-million dollar contract...there's no way she'd go without me. It's not worth her safety. You don't know what type of supervision she'll have or even if the chaperones are acceptable --if you know what I mean. Can you not get an injunction?Maybe I'm thinking of something else. Either way I would have the mother in court so fast her head would spin. Unless you go, don't let her. Look at cnn news and how frequently abductions happen. It's scary and it's real.
  #12 (permalink)  
Old 06-06-2006, 08:50 AM
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stoop,


I can relate to your concerns as I do have a child around the age of your daughter. Absolutely no way would my child be attending without having a parent to supervise. It is a trip half way around the world. We are not talking a weekend trip to Toronto. Have you contacted the sponsoring agency yourself in an attempt to try to obtain some independent information and background ie: are they reputable; Are they established, has there been any problems with perhaps other models?

My own child does have a school field trip coming up this month. They are going to a few museums. In all over 30 students and 4 teachers plus a few parents to assist to supervise. I feel comfortable with this as:
1) First, it is local, 2) Second, I can attend if I like, 3) Third, 4 teachers in attendance to supervise 4)and lastly, the event was disclosed in an open regard - no secrets.

It is a touchy situation and most likely your ex will blame you somehow to turn your daughter against you. Things of this nature should be discussed between the parent's and only then when it is agreeable should the child be informed.


lv

Last edited by logicalvelocity; 06-06-2006 at 09:02 AM.
  #13 (permalink)  
Old 06-06-2006, 01:00 PM
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Thanks for your kind words! Sorry that your divorce ended up being such a painful one.

Ex parte just means without notice to the other side. Ex parte motions are normally only done if alerting the other side might cause problems - e.g. the other party may kidnap a child or dissipate substantial assets.

I have to agree with gktt re referring to yourself. I have trouble even typing your nick. Everyone makes mistakes; it's what you learn from them that counts.
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 06-06-2006, 07:59 PM
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Thank you all for your wonderfully helpfull posts and please keep them coming.
Everyone's input is very much appreciated.

As for being stoopid1, it's all good, it's a name I chose for myself and I can laugh at myself. I am stoopid in alot of areas but I also thanfully possess a couple qualities. I like being stoopid1 and well the shoe fits often. I was bitten by the music bug as a kid and for 8 or more hours a day I'd practice practice practice and this went on from 13 years old to 21 when the kids were born then I'd practice form when they went to bed until 2 am then to work at 7am. My point is when someone spends that many hours alone working you are maybe very proficient at your work but blind to alot of things in life from basically being almost a hermit. I wasn't aware of the kind of bs that goes on between people and the hurt that some try to inflict on each other until about maybe 10 years ago and i'm almost 39 now. I was unaware that people would do slimy things to purpously cause crap between others. I thought a court order drawn up by lawyers and signed by a judge would be done by the book and fair and square so to speak and well I now know that's not so. So call me stoopid1 one and all, it's humour for me and I can really use some. I'm acutely aware of my short commings and it's ok

thank you for your post God knows the truth. Every word you have said has ran through my mind also. If the television is on near me it's on cnn or the weather channel. I sometimes wonder if I'm overly cautious or overprotective and then I watch an interview with Natalie Holloway's parents and it's back to paranoid mode for me. And there are many more that are not as high profile but still someone's child. And yes it can happen to any of us. With things as unstable as they are in the world right now, I don't think anyone of us would be completely suprised if a world war errupted next month. I hope and pray not but things are fragile everywhere right now and my daughter would be in Japan to fend for herself. You and I may see all the risks but my ex does not, she sees money. thank you for your support and input.

LV Thanks again also. My mother was actually able to talk to a couple of people ( none of whom went to Japan ) who are or were in the modeling industry and they confirmed what I was told which was that they are reputable and well established and that they do have a couple top models on their roster. They have gotten my daughter a nice gig with hanes for a tv commercial and photo shoot and she said she's paid $ 500.00 per hour for this. From the reaserch I've done on the web and what i've been told, the Canadian agency is totally all good. My question is if they are so great then why this amature fill in the blanks contract with a minor child of 14. The agency in Tokyo however I know nothing about and that's where I get scarred. The ex says that they are a top agency in Japan and so big deal. It doesn't mean that she's safe there from pervert chauffeurs and photographers. If someone overthere is looking to snatch a 14 year old pretty Canadian or Americain blond girl for the sex trade what better place to look then a modeling agency dorm house. People have disappeared on cruise ships for god sake and yet none of this occurs to my ex. Hey I should be stoopid2 cause she is definately stoopid1. She has already created a wedge between my daughters and I so yes this is kind of like the frosting on the cake by me saying no and the ex saying yes. I don't care though because parenting is not a popularity contest to me and if she hates me for this decision then I'm ok with that. When she has children she'll understand and hopefully someday forgive me. And I agree about parents discussing things first but the ex already signed the contract and had my daughter sign it also before I ever heard a word of this trip. I think the ex is now worried that she'll have to pay for the plane tickets if she cancells out.Your opinion means alot and thank you again.

Jeff thank you as well for your time, input and support and especially for making your last post so I could understand what ex parte meant. Hey I'm getting smarter now,,,,lol.

thanks you all as I appreciate the time you take out of your day to respond to me and help me with my dilema. I did send out a registered letter this morning. I gave my reasons for not giving my consent and I also told her I would reconsider my decision if she provided my with adaquate and detailed information on the trip as well as her accompanying my daughter on the trip or her father and not her 27 year old mouthy roomate. I also asked for a detailed contract to be reviewed by an entertainment industry lawyer that is working for my daughter and not the agencies. I'm not confident in my ex's ability to function as a protector of my daughter while on this trip but it is her mother after all and I'd feel unreasonable saying flat out no way no how but I really don't have confidence in the ex either. I'm not certain even I would want that responsibility of guarding her over there. thanks to all and please keep your suggestions coming
  #15 (permalink)  
Old 06-13-2006, 06:30 PM
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Default here we go again

Hello everyone, just a quick update as to what's going on. I was served with papers today that say I must be in court on friday for this japan issue. The ex has all kinds of lies in her affadavid like I knew about this trip before she signed the contract amongst many other lies. Any one have advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. thanks, stoopid1
  #16 (permalink)  
Old 06-13-2006, 10:47 PM
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stoop,

it appears they got an emergency motion date. Voice your concerns in your affidavit clear and concise to the Judge. Attach your written letter. Judges try to rule with caution in mind.

lv
  #17 (permalink)  
Old 06-14-2006, 12:27 AM
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thank you very much LV
  #18 (permalink)  
Old 06-14-2006, 06:47 PM
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Hi everyone it's stoopid1 again.

It's official that I have to report to family court friday @ 10:00am without a lawyer and on 2 days notice.

In the history section of her affidavit there are 26 items listed and of those only 9 items are about my daughter going to japan. There are 4 items that are general info like married, kids, divorced blah blah. So this now leaves thirteen items about me. These 13 items are lies and put in there as her twisted version of the truth, they have nothing to do with the japan trip and everything to do to make me look bad and I must say she did an outstanding and superb job at it.

If a judge reads her statement and believes it to be true, they are going to come out ready to tear me a brand new behind. therefore I desperately need to file an answer to her affidavit so that the judge will have a chance to see that everything she says in her statement is not truth before they come out ready to kill me. The ex is a master at twisting and lieing to make me look bad. For a time she had my own parents believing her crap.

I'll be there without a lawyer, my nerves are shot, I'm a horrible speaker and I go blank when I'm stressed right out so you can see what a wonderfull experience this will all be for me on friday. Does any one know how to file an answer on my own and before friday when I'm on the hot seat. I'd really appreciate advice on this. I don't know how to go about it.

My other question would be if I would be permitted to use telephone conversation recordings or transripts against her? As well as to messages left on my answering machine? I'll be up late so anyone who can help will be God sent.
thanks, stoopid
  #19 (permalink)  
Old 06-14-2006, 07:30 PM
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stoop,

you have to complete your own affidavit. If you don't agree with the paragraphs and statements, you can rebut the statements or tell your own version of events.

In regards to the telephone and recorded transcripts, you can refer to them

ie: party x said this on such and such a date, The conversation was recorded.

The time for filing an affidavit is usually 2 days before the motion.

Remember that the other issues were thrown in to throw you off track. A curve ball so to speak. Don't lose focus of the primary issue.

You can get a blank affidavit form here "form 14A"
http://www.ontariocourtforms.on.ca/e...mily/index.jsp

in either pdf or word format.

If you don't have ms word, go here and download open office . Its free! You can use it to manipulate word docs.

http://download.openoffice.org/2.0.2/index.html

For the affidavit writing, take a look at this post for some tips on same.

http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/d...hlight=heresay

Normally the motion material are to be served well in advance. Seems like they are trying to ambush you on this.

lv
  #20 (permalink)  
Old 06-15-2006, 05:29 PM
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Default thank you LV

Sorry for not responding sooner, for the second night in a row now I've been up past 3:00am to prepare for friday. Thanks to your post Lv I was able to write up my answer last night and got everything done at the court house as well as served her lawyers secretary with the answer. I could never have got this done without you. I think I'll most likely lose tommorrow at least I can say I did my best to protect my daughter. Thank you thank you thank you. I'll post the results of tommorrows events asap.
stoopid1
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