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-   -   Interesting Article about Abused kids (http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f7/interesting-article-about-abused-kids-15179/)

torontonian 05-16-2013 05:20 PM

Interesting Article about Abused kids
 
Is World War Needed to Protect Our Children?
by Phyllis Chesler

Is World War Needed to Protect Our Children? by Phyllis Chesler

caranna 05-16-2013 08:48 PM

The court system does not want to believe that a well-spoken, charismatic man could really be a savage wife-beater or child abuser.

Not only the court system. There are other organizations such as churches who believe the abusers' lies and persona. Individuals are also easily duped by the abusers' "well-spoken and charismatic" ways.

FaithandMorals 05-16-2013 08:59 PM

There are also people that claim such things when it is not true.

What system do you see to avoid this?

Guilt until proven innocent or innocent until proven guilty?

I think Churchill's quote works best here; it is the worst system except all which have been tried before. He was commenting on democracy as a system but I think it applies here too.

FaithandMorals 05-16-2013 09:01 PM

The worst part about this article is that it assumes all abuse is perpetrated by males.

It is well known (and proven) that abuse does not discriminate by the abusers gender.

caranna 05-16-2013 09:05 PM

I wish I knew how to remedy the situation. In my case, I hid my husbands' beating and stayed inside the house, never going anywhere, until the bruises were healed. I took almost 2 weeks. He beat me on the face.

About the churches: I don 't mean all the churches protect the abuser. Some actually help the victim. But too often the abuser appears to be a God-fearing, charming man-in most cases. Many people in the church believe the lie that the woman should take whatever the "head of the household" dishes out, including the abuse. Awful.

dad2bandm 05-16-2013 09:05 PM

Interesting?

Maybe if one finds totally biased, hack writing to be interesting. Lol.

FaithandMorals 05-16-2013 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by caranna (Post 136915)
I wish I knew how to remedy the situation. In my case, I hid my husbands' beating and stayed inside the house, never going anywhere, until the bruises were healed. I took almost 2 weeks. He beat me on the face.

About the churches: I don 't mean all the churches protect the abuser. Some actually help the victim. But too often the abuser appears to be a God-fearing, charming man-in most cases. Many people in the church believe the lie that the woman should take whatever the "head of the household" dishes out, including the abuse. Awful.

You suggest churches should be held to some higher standard but it seems to me that you forget churches are populated with fallible people.

Are you not fallible? I am. It is vogue to attack religion but religion without people is not fallible.

I think it is inappropriate to suggest many people in the church believe the lie the woman should take whatever....

If that is your experience it is time to get a new religion.

caranna 05-16-2013 09:34 PM

I do believe the churches should be held to a higher standard. I don't need to "change my religion" as I believe in God who leads me every step of the way. God has given me the peace that passes all understanding. I feel very blessed.

After all these years of abuse, I am feeling a joy that transcends all the pain I have suffered for decades.

You have a completely false idea of "religion." Some of the biggest hypocrites are in churches. The church doesn't define my "religion". God does.

Of course people in churches are fallible. We all are.

Unfortunately, abuse, especially the violent , physical kind, arouses many bitter and hateful feelings in this forum. Abuse is also something many people would like to see swept under the rug. It's not sexy like adultery or arguing with your ex-spouse. Also "religion" pushes many peoples' buttons too. So I will not be commenting on this thread any further. I have made my point.

End of story.:)

sjandme 05-16-2013 09:42 PM

I thought that this would be a polarizing article - here.

I don't see this article through the lens of my own existence... my particular agenda. It is heinous.

Tayken 05-17-2013 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by caranna (Post 136906)
The court system does not want to believe that a well-spoken, charismatic man could really be a savage wife-beater or child abuser.

Not only the court system. There are other organizations such as churches who believe the abusers' lies and persona. Individuals are also easily duped by the abusers' "well-spoken and charismatic" ways.

The challenge is that those who allege to be abused often have underlying psychological issues that goes unexplored often.

Being "well-spoken and charismatic" does not automatically make someone an "abuser". Cogent and relevant evidence does.

A case-on-point example of an abuser, and now convicted and sentenced to deal abuser/murderer Jodi Arias demonstrates quite well how the Lundy Bankcroft and others theory of "domestic violence" fails in many situations of false allegations.

Good Luck!
Tayken


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