how to request a copy of the security tapes from the lobby camera?

[WorkingDAD]

Hello All

Just some side track from my last issue regarding late/blocked access. I know she is lying but I want to get all evidence what possible can be collected.

So here is question:

Anyone has any info how to request a copy of the security tapes from the lobby camera?

I have a filing that this one is not easy to pull out. and even if I manage to get it somehow it will be late as they probably do not keep it for long.

Thank you,
WD

[HammerDad]

Make a request to the property management company. You may need to file a subpeona. Chances are it will be a hard thing to get.

[WorkingDAD]

Originally Posted by HammerDad

Make a request to the property management company. You may need to file a subpeona. Chances are it will be a hard thing to get.

Base on what? I want to prove that mom lied that she waited for 40 min and I did not showed up? I think they will laught on me and call me funny

Would it be in her best interest or should I say onus on her to prove that she waited and all her story?

How that will help with not bring him next day even ? do you think I am over complicate it and try to prove every little bit what I said?

Honestly if I say I came at 1.25 - waited for about an hour sent two messages. and than more. and she will tell her lie again whom judge (the same judge who was on a trial) going to believe ?

[NBDad]

He with the best evidence wins.

Best way to handle things (I've said this before, as have others)

1. Go to the meeting spot at the prescribed time. Wait 15 mins.

2. If the child is not there, you send an email/text to the ex stating you are at X place and it is X time, you have been waiting for the past 15 mins and the child is not there for your parenting time. Indicate you will be going to grab a coffee and will be back in 15 mins and that you expect the child to be present as ordered.

3. Go buy a pack of gum, or a coffee or something from the nearest store...save your receipt. (Use your debit card...shows date/time of transaction on the receipt, as well as the date on the bank account)

4. Return to the meeting spot. If the child is STILL not there, then you send the ex an email/text indicating that it is now X time on X day and the child is not present as ordered for your parenting time. Indicate you will wait another 15 mins and at that point will be returning to your home, and will consider her a no show and in contempt of the existing order.

5. When you return home, you send an email to her (cc her lawyer if you can) indicating that she and the child were not present as per the current court order, and request she immediately provide the time when she will be bringing you the child for your parenting time, as well as provide you with make up time for the day missed.

6. Gather 3 or so instances of this denial of access stuff...then take your texts/emails, your receipts and corresponding bank statements as well as any witness affidavits, and file a contempt of court motion, requesting that your ex be held in contempt of the order, for a change in custody due to her inability to effectively promote the relationship between your child and you, or barring that make up time (if none was offered as requested) as well as for a police enforcement clause, and for costs.

You will likely get the contempt motion...MAYBE costs and MAYBE the make up time. The key is to ask for the other things anyway. And continue that pattern. Denial of access X3...file contempt as above, rinse and repeat.

Eventually the court will get sick of seeing you because of her stupidity, and the hammer will start to fall.

You don't need the security tapes. The onus is on HER to prove her claims. If you have the above texts/emails and corresponding receipts/bank statements to back YOU up....how can she argue you weren't there? If that was the case she would simply have responded to that saying SHE was there and YOU were not.

Some other suggestions...

See if there is a third party transportation company in your area that can do the pick up/drops offs for a fee. Best $20 a month I ever spent was getting that done. Neutral third party that can provide affidavits/be called as witnesses AND not having to deal with my nutjob ex..yes please.

Bring a witness with you. Friend/family member/etc. Have them write an affidavit to back your account. Cost you some pocket change to have it notarized. Better yet, have them VIDEO TAPE the exchange, or take a picture. If the exchange location has a visible clock somewhere (on a wall/etc), make sure THAT is in the picture. Is there someone with a newspaper nearby? Get the front page of the paper in the picture.

[WorkingDAD]

Originally Posted by NBDad

He with the best evidence wins.

Best way to handle things (I've said this before, as have others)

1. Go to the meeting spot at the prescribed time. Wait 15 mins.

2. If the child is not there, you send an email/text to the ex stating you are at X place and it is X time, you have been waiting for the past 15 mins and the child is not there for your parenting time. Indicate you will be going to grab a coffee and will be back in 15 mins and that you expect the child to be present as ordered.

3. Go buy a pack of gum, or a coffee or something from the nearest store...save your receipt. (Use your debit card...shows date/time of transaction on the receipt, as well as the date on the bank account)

4. Return to the meeting spot. If the child is STILL not there, then you send the ex an email/text indicating that it is now X time on X day and the child is not present as ordered for your parenting time. Indicate you will wait another 15 mins and at that point will be returning to your home, and will consider her a no show and in contempt of the existing order.

5. When you return home, you send an email to her (cc her lawyer if you can) indicating that she and the child were not present as per the current court order, and request she immediately provide the time when she will be bringing you the child for your parenting time, as well as provide you with make up time for the day missed.

6. Gather 3 or so instances of this denial of access stuff...then take your texts/emails, your receipts and corresponding bank statements as well as any witness affidavits, and file a contempt of court motion, requesting that your ex be held in contempt of the order, for a change in custody due to her inability to effectively promote the relationship between your child and you, or barring that make up time (if none was offered as requested) as well as for a police enforcement clause, and for costs.

You will likely get the contempt motion...MAYBE costs and MAYBE the make up time. The key is to ask for the other things anyway. And continue that pattern. Denial of access X3...file contempt as above, rinse and repeat.

Eventually the court will get sick of seeing you because of her stupidity, and the hammer will start to fall.

You don't need the security tapes. The onus is on HER to prove her claims. If you have the above texts/emails and corresponding receipts/bank statements to back YOU up....how can she argue you weren't there? If that was the case she would simply have responded to that saying SHE was there and YOU were not.

Some other suggestions...

See if there is a third party transportation company in your area that can do the pick up/drops offs for a fee. Best $20 a month I ever spent was getting that done. Neutral third party that can provide affidavits/be called as witnesses AND not having to deal with my nutjob ex..yes please.

Bring a witness with you. Friend/family member/etc. Have them write an affidavit to back your account. Cost you some pocket change to have it notarized. Better yet, have them VIDEO TAPE the exchange, or take a picture. If the exchange location has a visible clock somewhere (on a wall/etc), make sure THAT is in the picture. Is there someone with a newspaper nearby? Get the front page of the paper in the picture.

Thank you NBDad, for time to put it together. I think I read it before and know the drill

what I did not know is about
See if there is a third party transportation company in your area

what is that? How does it work in case of 3 y.o. ? I would pay some monies just to not see that face and avoid any future bullshit what she will try to come up in future ... another concern is safety of a kid (driving wise).

as for Bring a witness with you... not sure how that would work in case when I late little bit especially when I late because I stuck on a road...

[NBDad]

In my area, there are TWO transportation companies. They do things like custody/access exchanges, transport disabled children to special programs, etc.

They are also vetted by CAS, and would be whom a worker would call when they are apprehending children.

In short, they are essentially a glorified taxi company that is used and vetted for use by child protection agencies.

They provide car seats, etc....basically you pay them to do the pick up/drop off. Since they are a neutral third party, the chances of your ex losing her shit at them are much much less. And since they are a neutral third party, if the ex is a no show, etc, you can have them write a report or have them subpoenaed to testify.

[WorkingDAD]

Originally Posted by NBDad

In my area, there are TWO transportation companies. They do things like custody/access exchanges, transport disabled children to special programs, etc.

They are also vetted by CAS, and would be whom a worker would call when they are apprehending children.

In short, they are essentially a glorified taxi company that is used and vetted for use by child protection agencies.

They provide car seats, etc....basically you pay them to do the pick up/drop off. Since they are a neutral third party, the chances of your ex losing her shit at them are much much less. And since they are a neutral third party, if the ex is a no show, etc, you can have them write a report or have them subpoenaed to testify.

Hmm. Thank you for info.

Never hear about transportation part... Already called CAS worker and asked.
Will see what she will tell.

PS:
that actually would be nice to have such company in every city. If I win a lottery that will be on my list to setup something like that as "free of charge or pay base on income bases"...

[FaithandMorals]

WD, I do know that the taxis companies in your city do pick ups and drop offs for some school children to and from school. I do not know they offer the service you are looking for but I would ask them too.

[standing on the sidelines]

Originally Posted by WorkingDAD

Honestly if I say I came at 1.25 - waited for about an hour sent two messages. and than more. and she will tell her lie again whom judge (the same judge who was on a trial) going to believe ?

your ex has some issues, we all know that. Are you stating that you actually waited for an hour when you came to pick up your son?? Or are you just stooping to her level try to go to court lying and hope that the judge will not believe her because of her past lies??

stick to the facts and the truth at all times, it worked for you in the past and if you start lying and getting caught in lies then there goes your credability also.

As for the tapes, they may be on a 24 hour loop so every 24hrs the tape is recorded over. To me it is not worth the effort for this one time Not even sure they have any sort of legal obligation to turn the tapes over to you. Do like another poster suggested and keep track of the missed times and after a few times then you have built a case.nJust make sure that you are always on time.

[standing on the sidelines]

Originally Posted by WorkingDAD

Would it be in her best interest or should I say onus on her to prove that she waited and all her story?

i would think that the onus is on you to prove it. You are the one making the accusation so it would be up to you to prove it.