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Old 11-19-2011, 05:09 PM
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Mess is a jewel in the roughMess is a jewel in the roughMess is a jewel in the roughMess is a jewel in the rough

Originally Posted by Marcos View Post
Would it not be in the child's best interest to minimize the change in lifestyle/routine/family members/caregivers and such so as to protect the child as much as possible from distress when the parents separate?
Protecting a child from distress requires ensuring that the child is absolutely confident that they are not losing either parent.

If there is no child abuse present, the best situation for the child is to have 2 active parents. You aren't doing the child any favours by seeking sole custody, and neither would the mother.

Mothers tend to get custody because mothers tend to be the stay-at-home parent. If your spouse worked out of home and the child was in daycare, then the child was being cared for equally between you. In this kind of case, joint custody and shared parenting is a lot more likely. If your spouse was stay-at-home then she has a stronger argument for custody. If you work shifts or work on the road, etc, which is true for a lot of fathers across the country, then you have a lesser chance of custody.

The law isn't written to fuck you because you are man, and if you carry that chip on your shoulder you are making your life much more difficult. However society and the child-rearing situation and your employment situation may have made the situation unequal and the courts will see that.
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