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General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 09-12-2016, 10:50 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
As they should.
Agreed!


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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
This is typical. Remember, doctors are professionals and they won't do anything stupid. Also, there is more that someone can screw around with when it comes to school. Like moving the school out of jurisdiction. Medical there is a very well trained professional who is ultimately guiding parents through it all. They also can and will ignore the order if they feel their patient is in need of proper care. Doctors are not beholden to the court order.
I know the ex is wanting to move out of the province, would this stop her. I would like D5 to continue in the school she is in until high school.


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Don't worry about what they recommended for the other parent. Look at what they recommended for you.
They recommended this for both of us, but OCL already knew I have been doing such things to minimize the effects on D5. OCL even stated many recommendations to both of us that I have been stated to them and even started off with a line directly from my OCL application. I can't wait to get my hands on the final report.


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You can really screw up the educational stuff. That is why you were given that.
Thank god,lol.

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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
I would simply recommend you put forward a offer to settle that is exactly the same as the OCL report. 50-50 access. joint custody in the model of parallel parenting and for any dispute resolution the matter goes to arbitration not court.
I will be working on one now to OCL report, but still looking for a good example so I don't rely to much on my overworked lawyer. I think they gave final say instead of arbitration because it would be hard for us to cover costs of this. May be good if the one that loses must pay for such costs?

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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
No need to fight any further than this. Glad to see the SteelCity OCL got a good wake up call after having their wings clipped.
I agree this is a win not only for me. I would like to thank this site,the Tips for dealing with OCL and Private Assessors thread, and the ones who stood here before me.
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 09-12-2016, 11:24 PM
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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
if your ex has final say in medical then she has final say. You are basically saying that you will make suggestions on kids medical care and if she doesn't agree then that you wont allow it and go for sole. In reality you want all decision making from what you are saying.
Short version below:

I have to come to terms that I could live with this until D5 is 18. I will be sending OTS to OCL recommendation specs and if she doesn't' bite on that I will most likely address some issues with the current "clinic" D5 is at. Mainly I believe this decision was made due to the ex stating that this has been her doctor since birth. This is true however, D5 has seen this doctor 6x in her first two years. After that she has seen this doctor for close to 6 more times until now. She has been to this clinic but always gets a different doctor, some of them are students or in training that she has seen.

There has been concern as D5 wasn't up to date with her shots when I was told she was. I brought D5 records to my new doctor and they confirmed that she wasn't, so I booked appointment so she wouldn't miss a day of school.

The ex even stated today in our disclosure meeting that she wishes to expose D5 unnecessary treatments and therapy for no valid reason and I have been told by D5's doctor that this should not be done and both parents should work on themselves, I have done this

I am of aboriginal decent and so is D5, my ex is not. We believe in certain type of healing alongside with medication. My ex think over prescribing antibiotics for children is great and has forced doctors to give them even when they strongly disagreed with it. The current clinic she is at does this and even allows you to request almost anything you would like for any reason. My current doctor would never allow this and she would see the same practitioner every visit.I would like to see if she would even listen to the pros and cons of each doctors office or just dictate how she has been until our separation.

My new doctors has almost everything on site. I have been treated for by a practitioner, dentition, traditional healer, foot care specialist, diabetes specialist, got retinal scans, have reflexology, and even been recommended wine from the Sardinia region of Italy all so I can live to be 100 and be around for D5.

The ex hasn't even made a dentist apportionment or eye appointment in the last year as recommended, and I have done all this too.

It may sound like I want it all however; if you knew, it would be more like the ex wants nothing more than a paycheck.


Short version: Have you ever tried reasoning with a wall?

Last edited by SteelCityDad; 09-12-2016 at 11:35 PM. Reason: Added short version
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  #13 (permalink)  
Old 09-13-2016, 12:28 AM
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You mention that you are of "aboriginal descent" and go on to talk about traditional vs. non-traditional medicine. Can you articulate if you are First Nations, Metis and if you have had the benefit of an aboriginal/First Nations/Metis representative or counsellor through your litigation?

Have you adhered to non-traditional Native practices your entire life or is this something new? Have you consulted with your Elders on your predicament?

Have you alerted your daughter's current physicians (old one and new one) to your traditional beliefs?

When attending a medical clinic it is not unusual for patients to be seen by several medical interns/students but they are under the guidance and direction of a certified medical doctor. What specifically is the medical procedures that you are not in agreement with?

In one of your first posts you mentioned an incidence where your ex was intoxicated and unable to effectively parent. Do you believe your ex has an alcohol or drug addition problem? If so, have you raised your concern with a medical practitioner?

There was quite a terrible case not long ago in Alberta where a couple has been incarcerated for letting their child starve to death (among other things). This is attributable to the religion that the couple prescribed to. It stands to reason that many people in "the system" are vigilant about parents who dismiss use of antibiotics and vaccinations. In this situation you should seek direction from your Elders, Native Liaison person to help you decide the best way to present your position on medical care.

Good luck!
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 09-13-2016, 11:05 AM
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Originally Posted by SteelCityDad View Post
I am of aboriginal decent and so is D5, my ex is not. We believe in certain type of healing alongside with medication.
I believe that Hogwarts provides the best type of alternative healing.
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  #15 (permalink)  
Old 09-13-2016, 01:20 PM
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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
You mention that you are of "aboriginal descent" and go on to talk about traditional vs. non-traditional medicine. Can you articulate if you are First Nations, Metis and if you have had the benefit of an aboriginal/First Nations/Metis representative or counsellor through your litigation?
First Nations, I have not had a court worker. I will if this matter returns to court.


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Have you adhered to non-traditional Native practices your entire life or is this something new? Have you consulted with your Elders on your predicament?
Something rather new, but have practiced some parts my whole life. I have consulted my elders today.

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Have you alerted your daughter's current physicians (old one and new one) to your traditional beliefs?
Yes, the old doctor at one time asked me who is Mongolian when I brought up an issue.


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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
What specifically is the medical procedures that you are not in agreement with?
Over prescribing antibiotics for next to no reason when topical ointment or nothing could resolve issue. Ex not willing to follow doctors orders. Privacy concerns at old doctors. The ex stated she would like to get D5 therapy at our disclosure meeting, old doctors directly advised against this when I brought forth this concern months prior and stated both parents should go first before anything is done with D5 head. The ex is looking to get this done ignoring doctors recommendations and only I followed threw on their recommendations.

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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
In one of your first posts you mentioned an incidence where your ex was intoxicated and unable to effectively parent. Do you believe your ex has an alcohol or drug addition problem? If so, have you raised your concern with a medical practitioner?
No.

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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
There was quite a terrible case not long ago in Alberta where a couple has been incarcerated for letting their child starve to death (among other things). This is attributable to the religion that the couple prescribed to. It stands to reason that many people in "the system" are vigilant about parents who dismiss use of antibiotics and vaccinations. In this situation you should seek direction from your Elders, Native Liaison person to help you decide the best way to present your position on medical care.
That is a terrible story that happened there. That will never be my case as I believe in the use of antibiotics and personally am on some now. My view is that they should be prescribed when needed not when a client causes a seen to get them prescribed as when they are really required they may not be as effective or effective at all. I also believe that they should be taken as the practitioner prescribes and not stop taking them once you feel better as the ex does. My views on vaccinations is that people should be kept up to date as I have made sure D5 and myself are, and I do not agree with how they are done in the school nowadays and should be left to your practitioner to administer them.

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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
Good luck!
Thanks! I am going to do what Tayken has mentioned; not fight and try to settle, as I already have what I want. The only thing that may be hard to handle is if the ex wants to start messing with D5's head. If she does not wish to settle as per OCl recommendations than I may make my points of view known.
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 12-22-2016, 10:12 PM
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Just an update to my situation. I have received a signed final order from my ex surprisingly. Seems that her lawyer may have given up on her as it is full of errors and conflicting times and items within.

No shock that my ex wants all holidays in 2017, maybe she doesn't plan on being around in 2018?

I have been waiting for the ex to respond regarding a get together so we could both talk about terms for our final order, but they have just been ignored from both her directly and by her lawyer. Don't know how we are going to get together in the future if we can't even do it for something so important and that will be around until our D6 is an adult.

Hopefully I can decipher what her lawyer has made and add to it in a final order.
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