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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 09-18-2014, 10:43 AM
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Originally Posted by Straittohell View Post
On the bright side, if she hasn't nailed a new permanent sugar daddy in 6 years, she will still have no job, no career, and you will suddenly be flush, and free of her forever. (yeah, you'll still pay child support, but even that ends at some point)
Yes, just keep your mind on the fact that she's playing a short-term game. In a few years, spousal support will be done and it will be over. And as she gets older, it will be harder and harder for her to find dumb rich men who will pay for her company, as (in my observations) they tend to prefer young and bimbo-ish women. Plus, having a teenage boy won't make her a dude magnet.

She's on a downward path; you're on an upward one.

(And it sounds like you found a girlfriend who is a mature adult, something none of your ex's boyfriends' have managed to do).
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Old 09-18-2014, 10:44 AM
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No, that's another misunderstanding.

Spousal Support is awarded to indemnify FUTURE losses of having to have full custody.

Your SS bill would have been reduced also. Its an evil cycle...

At least you can teach your children not to make the same mistakes - thats my silverlining.

I had a 7 year marriage, my ex got 3yrs of support with a somewhat firm end date (Sept 2015). However I have to pay her 20k for legal fees and her premarital student loan which are not tax deductible.

I am giving 2/3 of my income to her right now and I have my kids 39.9% of the time.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 09-18-2014, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Straittohell View Post
On the bright side, if she hasn't nailed a new permanent sugar daddy in 6 years, she will still have no job, no career, and you will suddenly be flush, and free of her forever. (yeah, you'll still pay child support, but even that ends at some point)
I think this is a bitter way to look at things. In the best interests of his kids hopefully she does find a good new guy that will support her etc... As much as I dislike my ex I think if she does manage to scam someone into a committed relationship I hope they are wealthy and nice.... its unlikely but one can dream....
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:35 AM
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Careful pot, said the kettle.
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:35 AM
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Originally Posted by movingON1975 View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Straittohell View Post
On the bright side, if she hasn't nailed a new permanent sugar daddy in 6 years, she will still have no job, no career, and you will suddenly be flush, and free of her forever. (yeah, you'll still pay child support, but even that ends at some point)
Oh god I know.

I'm thinking there will be an new Audi in the driveway the next day..
Put pictures of it up on your office wall and fridge door as motivation to get through the next six years! Hopefully it's a firm end date and not a review.
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:39 AM
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No, that's another misunderstanding.

Spousal Support is awarded to indemnify FUTURE losses of having to have full custody....

I don't doubt you at all, but I call BS whom ever drafted that up.

He's in grade 4, and in school all day. I could get a live in nanny from the phillipeans for less than I'm giving her...




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I am giving 2/3 of my income to her right now and I have my kids 39.9% of the time.
Let me guess, she HAD to keep you under the 40%, for the sake of her wallet, err children....
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:40 AM
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Careful pot, said the kettle.
lol that was a good one
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:43 AM
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Plenty of Fish, apparently. She must be running a baby-sitting service too, because she watches these guys kids while they go out...

It's just frustrating, to see my money going out the door to someone whom has never had a bone of ambition in their life. Let me be clear, if she had actually given up a career to stay home, that would be a different story. I would get it, there would have been a financial loss as compared to not having stayed home.

The deal was she was going to stay home from her minimum wage job until our son was full-time school. He started school, and she refused to go back to work, or for some kind of educational program... wanted to be a SAH mom, for a child who was full time school.

Now she is getting more money per year from me than she has EVER made in her life. ie child and spousal support together "pays" her $20.19 an hour (40 hours x 52 weeks) to troll Plenty of Fish for the next sucker.

Thanks for your support here, I cant talk to my girlfriend about this, me having to give half of my net pay to my ex is a bit of a sore point. She's divorced too, but no kids... and no support, since she is an adult who can nicely support herself, as can her ex husband.

thanks all
Yeah, cases like yours really make me despair for my own gender sometimes. We still need feminism because our own side is sabotaging us!

I also look forward to a day where we acknowledge that marriage is rarely till death these days, and get rid of the idea that one spouse should be financially responsible for the other one past the end date. Each spouse should just take their half of the assets in equalization and fend for themself after that. Maybe keep spousal support only in rare cases where there was legitimate career damage.
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:45 AM
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Put pictures of it up on your office wall and fridge door as motivation to get through the next six years! Hopefully it's a firm end date and not a review.
I like that idea, a lot. Thanks! It will be red, to match my personality. Or so was suggested before.

I'm pretty sure its firm? ".....commencing on date, and continuing on the Xth of each month thereafter for a duration of seven years, being date, 2021."
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:46 AM
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Originally Posted by movingON1975 View Post
I don't doubt you at all, but I call BS whom ever drafted that up.

He's in grade 4, and in school all day. I could get a live in nanny from the phillipeans for less than I'm giving her...
Its in the SSAG.


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Originally Posted by movingON1975 View Post
Let me guess, she HAD to keep you under the 40%, for the sake of her wallet, err children....
Umm, no she was fighitng tooth and nail to get me to be EOW but I had a psychosocial report saying it should be shared custody with nothing negative to say about me. The judge actually really liked me but he said "She's was a SAHM" so we'll do a transition until Sept 2015 and he said "she has full custody" but come back after lunch and tell me what access you want.
I asked 3 weekends out of 4 thursday after school to monday..... The judge agreed but did 2 weekends out of 3 + 2 weeks christmas + 3 weeks summer (I get first choice). Its just dumb luck that it came out to ~39%.... Anyways I will be in court in 8 months for the custody review and end of SS ...
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