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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

View Poll Results: What was the main reason for your relationship breakdown?
Financial issues 61 22.85%
Inactive parent 34 12.73%
Different parenting styles 37 13.86%
Clashing personalities 79 29.59%
Addiction (gambling, alcohol, drugs) 54 20.22%
Spousal and/or child abuse 53 19.85%
Other 111 41.57%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 267. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 05-07-2007, 10:53 AM
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My marriage breakdown had to do with money and his family. His mother was always sticking her nose in where it didn't belong. She kept interferring in our relationship. I was in and out of the hospital for 5 months when I was pregnant with our son and couldn't do anything for myself for the most part. I was on bedrest at home and my ex's mother would keep calling my ex and getting him to go over to her house for stupid things. My ex would take off without even getting me a glass of water or making sure my needs and our unborn was looked after first. There was days where he'd take off and I couldn't make anything to eat for a whole day. I would be feeling sick and have to phone the high risk unit only for them to tell me that I should be in the hospital, but since he was never there, I couldn't get there. This caused a lot of stress on myself and our relationship, so I just stayed in the hospital for 3 months until our son was born because I had no support at home. That is where our problems started. My ex told me after our son was born that if he could have chosen to have a kid or not, he would have chosen not to, yet our son was planned. My ex's mother, after we split up, set my ex up with a woman that she chose for my ex. They got together and are still together to this day. My ex's current girlfriend looks after everything. If I call my ex, his girlfriend answers for him in the background, he has no options of his own. I kinda feel sorry for him that he's surrounded by people who don't let him make his own decisions, but that's his problem.
  #12 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2007, 12:35 PM
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my breakdown was from my parents a little bit, my ex hated them and found anything she could to hate them more. Oh yeah, not to forget the affair she started right before she was pregnant with our second child and continued until we split up when the child was only 4 months old. But she claimed that she fell out of love with me.
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Old 05-13-2007, 09:04 PM
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I left for mental health issues. Tried to get him help multiple times. He doesn't believe he has a problem.

mominont
  #14 (permalink)  
Old 05-16-2007, 03:16 PM
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I didn't see an option for "Your spouse was completely insane", so I just chose "other"
  #15 (permalink)  
Old 05-19-2007, 10:26 PM
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My x is a non-abusive cerebral narcissist - obsessed with himself. If you understand anything about narcissists, they simply aren't capable of having genuine relationships.
  #16 (permalink)  
Old 05-28-2007, 04:14 PM
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Default Other: Artistic differences?

While my wife and I are on a maybe/maybe not course of (in)action, I chose other as the typical reasons don't seem to apply.

Facing middle-age as an artist she feels in a panic to get out there and make a name for herself before its too late. This was brewing for a while. I didn't like the people in the music/writing crowd I had dealt w/thru her for the years so she took less and less of interest in being a wife and mother. To an outside observer her choice might look absurd, or at least monumentally selfish.

My contribution to the problem was to try and hold too tight; the more I tried to control an unravelling situation the more she rebelled. (She has parent abuse issues that have come home to roost in middle age; this happens.) It was a bad cycle, so I'm not blameless.

Yes there's a guy kinda though she now says its platonic (huh?) but in the meantime I'm a single parent while she's out; mind you the boys are 18 and 10. I've asked for a divorce so I can have clarity, the boys and move on but she's holding out for the summer right now. Very much of two or three minds my wife. She can't just expect me (or any of us) to just wait (faithful 20 years and holding; I didn't find it hard to achieve.

Good luck and thx for the help on this site; it really helps. K
  #17 (permalink)  
Old 05-28-2007, 04:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ariana
My x is a non-abusive cerebral narcissist - obsessed with himself. If you understand anything about narcissists, they simply aren't capable of having genuine relationships.
Here you this. K
  #18 (permalink)  
Old 05-28-2007, 11:26 PM
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my ex in a nutshell was and still is an ass to our child and myself.....
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Old 12-03-2008, 10:11 PM
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Death of our nine year old daughter.
  #20 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2008, 08:44 AM
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Spousal abuse, financial issues from a gambling and drug addiction
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