What is the BEST part of divorce to you.

[CFIA]

The best part....none. I thought i would be free of actions, free thinking, free of unilateral decision (from the other half), free of fighting for the way my or i should say our son's is raised, free of "gee its hard to be a father when you are married to an overprotective mother" (note I could not see this when we married), free of my way or the highway, free of deciding what is best for my son (remember she is over protecting him), free of arguing for everything and nothing, free of being treated like the last item on the family priority totem. I thought i could start taking care of myself, after so many years of neglect (i have devoted all my life, my money, my time for my ex and my son). No nothing really good out of it except i did not commit suicide. We have decided to file for divorce in a friendly fashion, a separation agreement was signed 2 years ago and now 30 days before i go to court it is contested. she saw a lawyer and the situation between us became from friendly to wild. Suddenly all the leg work i have done to push all the paperwork from day one is no longer trustable despite the fact that it was all done under the various laws....no no fun for me.

[tugofwar]

Originally Posted by CFIA

The best part....none.
No nothing really good out of it except i did not commit suicide.

Suddenly all the leg work i have done to push all the paperwork from day one is no longer trustable despite the fact that it was all done under the various laws....no no fun for me.

Wow, pretty powerful words. Commit suicide- and how is that good for your son? You should be thinking about how that would affect him and the rest of his life and how that would mess it up ( from experience that is the most selfish thing you could do and depending on his age, will blame himself in the future if that did happen)

SHAKE OUT OF IT!!!!!! There is life after divorce. Think about your son!
Your wife doesn't want you back otherwise you could have tried to work it out. Why would you want to be with someone that doesn't love you?
Think about when your older and sick- would she take care of you? Doubt it.
You also stated all the leg work you did------ you didn't say we did. So, maybe she wanted to get an opinion from a lawyer, she has the right to do so. Power of words from others probably made her curious.
You are going to have to start accepting this is real and is happening and until you reach this level, Im sorry my friend you are going to have a hell of time getting thru this.

[TRG2010]

The best part is that I am begining to start to feel and act like me again! I am not afraid to play my music and dance in my living room. Im not worried about watching what I like and being critisized. I dont worry about being put down for wearing the clothes that I like. I dont worry about spending a little money on myself. I am free to be me again!!!!!!

[DadFirst]

What a great thread!

Mine are:
1. Going to bed when I want
2. Watching what I want on TV
3. Doing what *I* want on the weekends with my kids (when I have them). No more running around every weekend doing this and that. Honestly I don't understand why all these things *needed* to be done on the weekend.
4. Spending time with my kids doing what I like to do with them
5. Having a clean house but spending less time actually cleaning (wow, seems like impossible doesn't it, but it's true!)
6. Being in control of my finances (I too managed the finances when I was married, but it didn't matter how much I made, we never quite had enough! Now I'm finally looking to get ahead!)
7. Sleeping alone (sometimes its just a better sleep!)

Thanks everyone, this gave me a boost on a morning when I could really use it!

DadFirst

[bern]

Not having to make excuses as to why he has not come down to say hello to my parents or friends.

Not getting that sick feeling when I wanted to visit friends in another town.

Not being made to have sex on demand.

Not having my phone calls recorded.

Not having to cook lean meals everyday.

Not having to prepare his lunch/8 meals a day lean.

Having a cleaner house for sure w/2 kids.

Getting that happy feeling back is great when it comes

Finding myself

Having my own name

B

[Sowk]

The Divorce Diet; 25 pounds in 6 weeks and not having to go with her to the movie Sex in the City Part II.

[Elvis]

Originally Posted by bern

Not having to make excuses as to why he has not come down to say hello to my parents or friends.

Not getting that sick feeling when I wanted to visit friends in another town.

Not being made to have sex on demand.

Not having my phone calls recorded.

Not having to cook lean meals everyday.

Not having to prepare his lunch/8 meals a day lean.

Having a cleaner house for sure w/2 kids.

Getting that happy feeling back is great when it comes

Finding myself

Having my own name

B

These 3 made me LOL

I have 1 major good part in my divorce that is more important than any other thing I like from my divorce and that is not seeing my ex in-laws every day

[tugofwar]

Originally Posted by Elvis

I have 1 major good part in my divorce that is more important than any other thing I like from my divorce and that is not seeing my ex in-laws every day

Me too!!! LOL

[Mooview]

I love this thread and I'm so greatful you started it Jenny.....hahhahaha

For the first time in 46 years...lol since I was born....
"I DON'T HAVE TO DO THE RIGHT THING" I can make my own decisions for once.....I don't NEED the best of everything....
I can read till all hours of the night
No more planning my week around everyone else and eating dinner alone.....again.....
Cook and eat whatever I want....Junk food, desert only.....KD WITHOUT weiners......hahahahhahaha
Make Brownies in the middle of the night and eat the whole pan.....
or just eat the batter.....raw cookie dough.......
No more Taxi service and waiting for people.....

I'm 46 years old and I've never ever not felt a responsibility or obligation to someone else for something......it's hard....but I'm learning to be.....just be me.....
I just got my first apartment ever....first bedroom furniture ever....(okay....my Mom bought it and I owe....lololol....I owe... I owe....)
But I had this overwhelming urge to yell from MY BALCONY>>>>"THIS IS MINE"""

I also discovered how closed I'd become and secretive where my family was concerned.....about my marriage and myself....
THEY...parents are divorced 30 years ago...lol......but both of them have been amazing....I'm very, very lucky.....

Do you know how surreal it is to discuss your divorce with your divorced parents.......hahahhahahahahah

Best of all.......I don't mind my own company....as a matter of fact I think I likre me........hahahahahahha....Sounds like the old episodes of Sat. Night Live

Love to all and hopefully we can all look for one little tiny spark that makes us smile and get through another day in "PARADISE" !!!!

[Mooview]

Eating in bed and getting the crumbs on "His" side......lol