Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce Support

Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2011, 03:46 AM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Kingston, ON
Posts: 968
ddol1 is on a distinguished road
Default Thinking of throwing in the green towel and calling the lawyer - I am .....

This is not a question. This is more of a revelation of sorts

This post is actually after my pictures of the kids I claimed "show down with the ex last night" delemma which I figured how to have that post only show up later --but I hope this may help....

I admit I am losing control, I admit to lots of things but it is fair to say that my issues are more than the physical and the pain I deal with daily - the more crap and the more "pressure" she puts on me is now for sure better understood as real, it shuts me down. There is a reason for my confusion and difficulty in completing even basic tasks these days, months and...... I fully felt this when, or better after I called the police and they sent the car over two Sundays ago now. Had a week off as they all let up a bit and it looked like things were going to improve......

BUt that was less than a week ago - took me most of that time to regain my bearings and understand what I have completed and more what needs to be done and the "pressure" began slowly day by day. Now in full force it is like I am going in circles all over again - I actually made good headway in the time I did have last week and I am closer to the getting this all on paper, in a row, clean and understandable to the lawyer.

Doctor is onside 1000% - we are now understanding what is happening with me and perhaps there is help for me yet. But i have to get through this place, this house, my ex, this family long enough. Medical stuff is on the go and I really think if that was ready I would throw in that towel - I really have had enough. I am really happy that I was smart enough to put a "need to do in this order" list so I can continue getting this truely horid mess of what actually went on the last three or four years.

Why this has taken so long finally is making sense but it does not make ti any easier. I am real tired and I know I just have to keep it together. I am more sure than ever that I have to stand up for myself, my rights and hopefully just a little bit of fairness to correct a few pretty big wrongs clearly made. And as it turns out, clearly in the bank records, statements etc. How to stay focused when kaos is all around????

Thnks for understanding - help has been a life saver - regards to all!
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2011, 08:36 AM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,241
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

sounds like you are starting to get to that better place. Once you have a lawyer involved it will take some of the pressure off you. Maybe he can help you get the ball rolling and get you out of the hell you are in.

I know you have your issues so maybe its a good idea to take someone to the lawyers with you the times you go?? Or maybe record the conversations so later on you can listen to the conversation again??

I know its gonna be a shitty christmas there but hopefully the next one will be better
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2011, 05:06 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Kingston, ON
Posts: 968
ddol1 is on a distinguished road
Default

Spoke with the doctor for over an hour today - Gosh he is good to me. Understanding is the contacts that he must make to get the medical stuff evaluated will happen first of Jan when the other doctor (key to everything) gets back into town. He just can't believe what goes on here and he admits that I am still the best fighter in the practice so as to be still standing but he really understands I can't do this much longer, I need the medical backup, he is willing to do this for me even said if need be he would show up in court in person. I pray it doesn't get to that point, hopefully the rest will fall into place - I really hope!
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 12-26-2011, 03:02 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: calgary
Posts: 190
pokeman has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Default

some aspects of going through the court system is exact same as forms of 'abuse' over a prolonged period.

man or women, father or mother in the posts on this web site I can understand many of the emotional and physical difficulties many of us have.

i want to share this thought with you ...

about 3/4 of the way through my ordeal i was at work - upcoming court date - X acting erratic - no hope or way out in sight my vision became extremely blurred and I was dizzy, i couldnt even read the numbers on my phone ...

i just closed my eyes and waited for it too pass , about 20 mins later i drove to my docs office , i trust him - on a previous visit aware of my situation he told me I should get a "good lawyer " , he said he just had a visit from a 'extremely investigative' lawyer and wrote down a name on a piece of paper and handed it too me - when i got outside i read the paper - it was my X's lawyer I was currently facing in court ...

My doctor told me several things I believe too be true

#1 there is no justice for me in the family court system

#2 more relavent to this post he told me to not make an issue of stress or side effects of it in my case, cause it will make things even worse for me cause they (her lawyer) will try and protray me as incapable of looking after children ...

so i will say a pray for you somehow someway you can find the strength to not let what ever ale's you be an issue in the court room

wishing you all the best
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 12-26-2011, 03:33 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,241
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

it is so sad when the stress of the breakup affects your health. Its hard to believe that the person who we loved at one time so much can turn into our worst enemy at times.
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 12-26-2011, 07:18 PM
May_May's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 519
May_May is on a distinguished road
Default

I wish you all the best and am so happy for you that your doctor is offering such incredible support ! That is very rare in today's 'generation' of medical physicians...
I agree you need to seek a lawyer out and get some of this on the go. StandingonSidelines is right...it is so hard to believe when our exes turn out to be so completely different from the 'love' we knew. It's hard to reconcile.
I had several months and months that were hazy, and honestly I can't tell you the details/what happened. I think a lot of us almost hit 'rock' bottom and then come back and 'fight'. You will end up stronger than ever ! I know it...
Closed Thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:32 PM.