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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 09-15-2014, 05:58 PM
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Default STBX quit her job do i have to

STBX quit her job because she did not like the people she worked with. we have two kids together. When she was working at her job she did not opt into the pension plan, I paid the ten grand to get the match from the goverment. ( wher she worked). We own a business together 60/40 me owner, we pay in didvideneds, INC. 2 years ago she quit. In between all of this she says she wanted to go to work which she did part time a used clothing storefor 3 months where she got paid in discounts on the used clothing she bought, while the one child was in dayhome that i also paid. With our business she never did the books We had house cleaners come in once a week,.

My question would she be awarded spousal support we have been married for 5 years, one child is grade 2?

would a dayhome keep records of each time the child has been there? is there a rule they keep record of that. The neighbours keep telling me that the kids where always with baby sitters, actually I'm not sure what she did the last two years. And our youngest has been in dayhome for the last six months when she has been home doing nothing.
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Old 09-15-2014, 06:20 PM
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Hard to say, need more details.

1. Who will have custody (this affects spousal support theoretically).

2. What is her work history starting from before you cohabitted (you can make a timeline?

3. What is your income and hers now.

4. You co-own the company so you have to buy her out - how much is that going to cost?

5. What kind of job can she get and how long would it take?

6. Did you agree for her to stop working? Was she always looking for work?

7. Did she stop working to care for the home or child(whether you got a cleaner or not it doesn't matter).
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Old 09-15-2014, 06:35 PM
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1) I'm hopeing we go 50/50. I work away from home 2 weeks on and two off. the two weeks is 15 days. with travel.

2) Administration her whole life, worked at sourt house for 8 years quit because she did not like the people she worked with was her reason.

3) the company make roughly 310000 a year, my pay was 175000 a year and hers 75000 from business dividends. no other income

4)Not sure about about how much to buy her out lawyers are doing disclourser

5) Administration job. she was only out of the work force for two years.


6) No I didnt ask her to stop. She was making 50000 a year at courthouse ( Mediation of course was her field )

7) No she didnt our first child ( 8years )she worked and we put him in daycare, Our second child is 2 and up to six months ago she put her in dayhome that I did not agree to. She makes up her own mind and does as she pleases.
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Old 09-15-2014, 06:57 PM
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1. I am not sure how the court will feel about 2 week separations.... you are better off trying to break your travel to every other week. In my opinion you need to take this more seriously. From a financial perspect spousal support if ANY is going to be very limited - the place where they are going to make you pay is child support (MySupportCalculator.ca). I am not saying pursue custody for financial perspectives but I am saying realize that the way the rules are written is that you will get to see the kids ever other weekend and pay her 2000$+/month in child support.

2. Do you have any proof of that reason for quitting, she started looking again right after. On the balance of probabilities does it look like she quit for family reasons (did you just have a child or something) or for personal reasons...

3+4) so basically she can collect the dividend if she decides to stay part owner (is the dividend in lieu of salary?) - or she is going to get a decent buyout x00k+? Consider that if she can keep the job or dividend or w/e it'll mean she has a "job"....

5) Out of the workforce for 2 years - but did she reduce her work to part-time or anything else for any other part of the time?

6)

7) Ok but did she do the majority of child rearing from what you are explaining you are gone 26 weeks of the year and working normally the other 26.... when married.


Welcome to the world of divorce where "It's cheaper to keep her"....

Btw, I am just a troll on the internet - you are rich enough to consult a lawyer anyways... so do that.
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Old 09-15-2014, 07:20 PM
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1)I worked my whole life in the oilfield to provide for my family. I can only work 2 week on 2 off schdule. What am i working for if I cant see my kids. The dividends thats how we paid ourselves the company was suppose to be our nest egg ( pay less taxes ) I worked out the calculator lots if she takes her name off the company i would end up paying over 5grand a month spousal and me paying CS it would be close to 3700 a month plus Section 7 because I cant see her getting a job that pays her more the 35000 a year.

2)No I dont have proof. Of course she well say she quit to look after the kids.

5) She worked through manpower odd jobs before she got this job with the goverment.

7)Well It looks that way I worked a way 6months out of the year my whole life.


I did so much for her got her out of debt paid her bills paid all the bills, I bet if I made no money this divorce would not go through. Its always about money. They never look at what you did for them thats the part that gets to me.


What should I do quit my job and get a job in the city, Start a new company without her, I'm done
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Old 09-15-2014, 07:24 PM
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On the one hand, it was a short-term marriage (5 years) and your ex is presumably still young); on the other hand it sounds like your work schedule was pretty brutal (out of town 50% of the time, making her effectively a single parent half the time). She may be able to argue that your economic success depended on her cutting back her own working to pick up the slack at home and look after the kids (not saying this is the truth, just that it's a plausible argument). In other words, you owe her for her "sacrifice". It might be best to think about a lump-sum payment for spousal support, enough for her to retrain and get back on her feet. Whether or not she liked the people at work and whether you liked the dayhome she picked is irrelevant.
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Old 09-15-2014, 07:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post

Welcome to the world of divorce where "It's cheaper to keep her"....

Btw, I am just a troll on the internet - you are rich enough to consult a lawyer anyways... so do that.

A lawyer, or a one-way flight to Costa Rica.
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Old 09-15-2014, 08:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by childrenand happy View Post
1)I worked my whole life in the oilfield to provide for my family. I can only work 2 week on 2 off schdule. What am i working for if I cant see my kids.
You work provide for them and her (that is the court perspective) - they don't care if you see your kids or not - as long as you pay and never reduce your income. You will get to see them once in a while but thats it.

If I were you, I would start seeing what you can do to make the week on - week off happen even if it means taking pay reduction or something. If the kids were older maybe every 2 weeks would work but not at this age - I think....


Quote:
The dividends thats how we paid ourselves the company was suppose to be our nest egg ( pay less taxes ) I worked out the calculator lots if she takes her name off the company i would end up paying over 5grand a month spousal and me paying CS it would be close to 3700 a month plus Section 7 because I cant see her getting a job that pays her more the 35000 a year.
The calculator doesn't consider "entitlement" which means it is assuming she is ALREADY going to get SS. We're discussing entitlement here.

Quote:
2)No I dont have proof. Of course she well say she quit to look after the kids.
If you were a women favouring judge (just pretend ) what would you believe?

5) She worked through manpower odd jobs before she got this job with the goverment.

7)Well It looks that way I worked a way 6months out of the year my whole life.


Quote:
I did so much for her got her out of debt paid her bills paid all the bills, I bet if I made no money this divorce would not go through. Its always about money. They never look at what you did for them thats the part that gets to me.
Actually, its the opposite the more you DO they say you created a state of dependency and so now you have to keep doing it. Just don't cohabit again unless your in Quebec, they will always get you with something.


Quote:
What should I do quit my job and get a job in the city, Start a new company without her, I'm done
You could perhaps do that but I think you need a very good reason otherwise you will be raped in court. You are a big earner, they don't want to lose that income. You need to do research cases like yours on canlii.org

The lump sum spousal support is a good option but its a special calculation to consider that is not tax deductible, risk free (for her), + time-money value.

Don't lose hope, its VERY VERY tough but at the end consider yourself lucky - it was a short marriage she worked most of the time and you make excellent money. My opinion is that you focus on the custody aspect if you still want to be a father to your children but in my opinion you must fix your work schedule...
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Old 09-15-2014, 08:39 PM
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thats the problem with oil patch you give so much time they dont allow family on location, thus is why Alberta is divorce capital. If I could change my schdule I would believe me. They would let me go and just get someone else to fill my position. Thanks for everything In the end she walks away with finacial freedom55 and I still work away what a kicker.
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Old 09-15-2014, 09:18 PM
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You might not believe it now, but all of the money you "lose" in your divorce will be the best money you've ever spent.... hey I'm only going to be out $400,000 or so in the end. But worth every penny....


Money does buy happiness, it pays the spousal support cheques and child support cheques to get yourself to a better place in life.

Focus on yourself and your kids.
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