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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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Old 11-27-2015, 04:30 PM
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I got served paper and through the response preparation process and talking to the lawyer to get more than 50% access, I started getting anxiety and panic attacks just can't imagine my kids being away from me when I am spending most of the time with them.
So much sacrificed I have made(at least that's how I feel) and the days are numbered that I will not be able to spend much time with them plus the prevalent jump start at the parental alienation from the other parent.
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Old 11-27-2015, 06:37 PM
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So what did she serve you?

Take a deep breath and realize that this is merely the start of a very long process, particularly when children are involved.

Did you sell your house yet or get it on the market? Is it a Notice of Motion for exclusive possession of the matrimonial home and interim CS and SS? Is there a court date included in the document?

Perhaps start using the expression "parenting time" in place of "access."
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Old 11-28-2015, 05:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abuseddad View Post
I got served paper and through the response preparation process and talking to the lawyer to get more than 50% access, I started getting anxiety and panic attacks just can't imagine my kids being away from me when I am spending most of the time with them.
So much sacrificed I have made(at least that's how I feel) and the days are numbered that I will not be able to spend much time with them plus the prevalent jump start at the parental alienation from the other parent.
You have to accept that fact that there will be changes in your life, I know its hard but its part of divorce.

Why not go for the 50/50?? How much money will you spend to try and get what you want but if you don't that's money that could have been used for RESPs for the kids. Is this your way of trying to get some revenge on the ex? Trying to get more parenting time then her so she will have to pay full CS if you were to win?
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Old 11-28-2015, 08:16 AM
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Is there a reason why your ex shouldn't get 50-50? More than you just wanting the most time with them? With divorce comes change and you are not going to be able to see your kids every day. Remember this feeling you are feeling about wanting them every day they are also feeling about wanting to see both their parents every day. Don't let your emotions come before your kids feelinga

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Old 11-28-2015, 08:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
Is there a reason why your ex shouldn't get 50-50? More than you just wanting the most time with them? With divorce comes change and you are not going to be able to see your kids every day. Remember this feeling you are feeling about wanting them every day they are also feeling about wanting to see both their parents every day. Don't let your emotions come before your kids feelinga
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I wonder how many men on here who are fighting for 50/50 will chime in and steer this father on the right path? Or is bias that some men talk about not just against men and not just in the court system?

I know for myself I don't care if its a woman or man trying to cut the other parent out I think the same, each parent has the same rights for the most part. The only exception to me is if the other parent abused the kids or did other things that put the kids in real danger.

After a divorce things change some parents who didn't have much to do with the kids get forced to step up to the plate and guess what, they handle it. Maybe before they were never really given a chance or the other parent nit picked everything that they did so they gave up.

Last edited by standing on the sidelines; 11-28-2015 at 08:45 AM. Reason: spelling
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Old 11-28-2015, 08:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
I wonder how many men on here who are fighting for 50/50 will chime in and steer this father on the right path? Or is bias that some men talk about not just against men and not just in the court system?

I know for myself I don't care if its a woman or man trying to cut the other parent out I think the same, each parent has the same rights for the most part. The only exception to me is if the other parent abused the kids or did other things that put the kids in real danger.

After a divorce things change some parents who didn't have much to do with the kids get forced to step up to the plate and guess what, they handle it. Maybe before they were never really given a chance or the other parent nit picked everything that they did so they gave up.
I agree... in my opinion it should always start off at 50-50. Then up to the parent who wants more time to prove why a willing parent shouldn't have equal access. Not all parents want equal access and that will come out quickly. Unfortunately it comes down to money most times

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Old 11-28-2015, 08:53 AM
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Yep. I already said my piece in his other thread.

Maximum Contact Principle.

The CHILD deserves as much contact as humanly possible with both parents, unless there are extenuating circumstances. This has nothing to do with gender, never has.
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