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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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  #41 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 12:39 AM
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^^^^ Excellent point.
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  #42 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 07:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stripes View Post
You're paying the full table support now, even though you have 50/50, right? It sounds like this should be the first thing to be fixed legally. Even if you were successful at imputing an income to your ex, if you're not paying offset, it wouldn't reduce your CS payments (based on your income).
Imputing income should have been requested from the first motion. Since this has not been addressed , the judge has not taken any decision on the matter. If it would have been done, CS would have been offset from the table for both parties. This needs to be rectified ASAP.
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  #43 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 08:37 AM
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Sorry S&T .. you seem to be permanently on my ignore list. Won't let me unignore you.

To be clear. My g/f is in school to become a nurse and yes she is pulling her weight financially. Our budgeting is not bad. We simply have more going out than coming in. Like many we have student loans, car payments, etc. We've cut all unnecessary expenses and don't go out.

It doesn't help that my ex refuses to pay for anything regarding D5. I do all the pizza days, milk days, field trips, extra curricular's, etc.

To boot she is running a daycare out of her house under the table. I haven't reported anything because I don't want to rock any boats and I'm hoping that she will realize that breaking the law is just wrong.

Ex is bilingual and educated. She could get a higher paying job than me with the government Im sure. I'm pretty sure my financial situation will improve when she follows the order from the courts and finds full time employment.

If I do go to court I'll have my ducks in a row .. and yes my financial situation will improve. It's looking like that's what needs to happen .. this summer possibly.
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  #44 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 08:56 AM
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I was going to chime in about the daycare. So even if her social assistance was reduced shes making money under the table to either make up for it or exceed her income. Shes capable of working, she just doesnt want to and thats not fair to anyone. This just proves how little she cares for following the law or even a judges orders.
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  #45 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 09:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
I was going to chime in about the daycare. So even if her social assistance was reduced shes making money under the table to either make up for it or exceed her income. Shes capable of working, she just doesnt want to and thats not fair to anyone. This just proves how little she cares for following the law or even a judges orders.
She's danced around the law for several years now. False allegations, abduction, welfare fraud, etc.

Some posters enjoy portraying her as clever. I disagree and feel that her behavior should not be praised.
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  #46 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 09:38 AM
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Oh shes clever, but that doesnt make it right. Funny that the same poster(s) that dance around it being ok for your ex to hide income and flaunt the law are going through similar issues with their exs...
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  #47 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 09:47 AM
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Oh shes clever, but that doesnt make it right. Funny that the same poster(s) that dance around it being ok for your ex to hide income and flaunt the law are going through similar issues with their exs...
I never said it was okay for her to hide money. Please quote where I said that. I don't think it is right at all. Don't put words in my mouth.

And it is okay to post to me directly, rockscan. I have no respect for passive aggressiveness.

And I agree, she is clever.

My point, since you both seem to miss it, is that going after his ex may not help all that much to improve HIS financial situation. I think he has urgent financial problems if creditors are calling and his budget is already stripped down. How is he going to fix that? Focusing on how to get child support from her is not an immediate answer.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Ex is bilingual and educated. She could get a higher paying job than me with the government Im sure. I'm pretty sure my financial situation will improve when she follows the order from the courts and finds full time employment.

If I do go to court I'll have my ducks in a row .. and yes my financial situation will improve. It's looking like that's what needs to happen .. this summer possibly.

I see by his post above that he is hoping/planning that his ex will pay child support to HIM.

This is not a reasonable solution to his immediate financial woes. As OrleansLawyer has pointed out many times, don't budget child support as an income. It could go away at any time. Lovingfather can only control himself and his choices. He needs to make different financial choices quickly.

I am just giving logical, practical advice.

Last edited by SadAndTired; 06-21-2016 at 09:56 AM.
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  #48 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 10:02 AM
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Oh shes clever, but that doesnt make it right. Funny that the same poster(s) that dance around it being ok for your ex to hide income and flaunt the law are going through similar issues with their exs...
Quite an interesting observation Rockscan. :-)

Given her education, etc. I can swing through job postings (there's tons .. and QC border to a certain city is only a 15 minute commute from her home if she plans on using the "my credentials only work in QC" card).

I'll simply show the judge what she's capable of making and I bet I'll be paying nothing in the end .. or she'll be paying me.
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  #49 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 10:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
...
...She kept asking why I couldn't come...
LF32... There will be many years to come, of school recitals and field-trips, etc. Right now, she's in J/K, so more stuff happens during the day, but eventually, some events will happen in evenings, or right after-school too, and it will balance out.

I'm in the same situation, but my daughter is a bit older now (7). I work full-time to support our kid; Mom is quite content to have everyone else support her and her kids for her, for the last 7+, and more, years.

It is hard when your kids say "can you come to X event?" and you can't make it, but, there will be other times where you can go. If you make the effort, to go, when you are able to, believe me, that your kid will be happy.

It affects us, more than it does them.


Re: Your ex; it's not like she's new to the work force, or never worked before. She has schooling and training, to work in a field, where she could be contributing more, towards the shared costs for your child, resulting in better opportunities for your child. Your judge already told her to seek employment.

Is the reason you're paying "full-support" now, because you technically pay offset support, but there's nothing to "offset" against? I thought that was the case, but I can't remember.
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  #50 (permalink)  
Old 06-21-2016, 10:45 AM
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I believe what LF32 has clearly discussed is that he wants to go to 50/50 offset support rather than full table with s7 expenses clearly stated so that costs are balanced and his ex is paying her share. Hes clearly stated she pays nothing for any activities. Remember in other threads how things like pizza day and field trips are covered by cs? Well his ex is getting cs and NOT paying for non s7 expenses. Hes asking for balance. If she finds a job making more money than him then he will get money but at this point Im pretty sure that he would just like his cs to be fair and reflective of the time his daughter is with them both.
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