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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 06-20-2014, 01:14 PM
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That's crazy... you know the average home price in Canada in $420,000, right? And the average income is in the 40k range? Single parents can't afford homes with that kind of space. Unless you know, CAS wanted to subsidize the rent so single parents can afford an extra room.
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Old 06-20-2014, 01:24 PM
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They do have subsidized housing throughout the Provence. We call them no daddy row housing......
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Old 06-20-2014, 01:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
Having researched this topic, specifically in regards to CAS guidelines on it, these are the few references I have been able to find:

FAQ - CAS Cornwall

Frequently Asked Questions | Family & Children's Services of St. Thomas and Elgin County
Having read all the quotes, I don't see where is provides children cannot share a room. Generally speaking, it simply provides that it is better if they have their own rooms as it could cause them embarrassment etc. It is more of a public service notice than policy statement/requirement.
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Old 06-20-2014, 01:26 PM
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Quote:
That's crazy... you know the average home price in Canada in $420,000, right? And the average income is in the 40k range? Single parents can't afford homes with that kind of space. Unless you know, CAS wanted to subsidize the rent so single parents can afford an extra room.
Human nature doesn't care what house prices are - CAS is just stating what a child's expectation is for privacy even as a child.

Human nature is why children get screwed in divorces because while its all great and cool to say children survive after divorce, the reality it has a profoundly negative impact on them for the rest of their lives much like being the survivor of a war - sure - you "survive" but what does that mean?
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Old 06-20-2014, 01:29 PM
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Although news reports indicate the $420K average across Canada, it doesn't indicate what you get for that $420, but I can pretty much guarantee it isn't a modest home that meets a family's needs vs their wants.

Nobody *needs* a fancy home, or even to own their own home. Many families and children grow up in apartments and there is no law, guideline or suggestion that this is inappropriate or better/worse than growing up in a luxury home.

Perhaps instead of expecting the gov't to tailor subsidies to meet people's expectations, people should consider a realistic need vs want mentality and tailor their expectations to what is needed, vs wanted.
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Old 06-20-2014, 01:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Once.is.enough View Post
They do have subsidized housing throughout the Provence. We call them no daddy row housing......
Wow. Here, we call it a hand up to those truly in need and don't contribute to the stigma around needing help that prevents families who truly *do* need from asking.

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Originally Posted by HammerDad View Post
Having read all the quotes, I don't see where is provides children cannot share a room. Generally speaking, it simply provides that it is better if they have their own rooms as it could cause them embarrassment etc. It is more of a public service notice than policy statement/requirement.
Exactly. There is nothing that says kids can't or even shouldn't share a room - or even a bed - as long as everyone is happy and comfortable.
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:19 PM
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Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
Wow. Here, we call it a hand up to those truly in need and don't contribute to the stigma around needing help that prevents families who truly *do* need from asking.



Exactly. There is nothing that says kids can't or even shouldn't share a room - or even a bed - as long as everyone is happy and comfortable.
Umm.... did you even read what was posted

Quote:
At what age is it appropriate for children of the same or opposite sex to share bedrooms?
As children of the opposite sex age, their privacy becomes important. Young children sharing the same rooms is often a necessity for many families, but as children mature and begin to reach puberty there is a need for privacy. However, once a child reaches the age of six or seven, they naturally become conscious about their bodies and differences between the sexes. Sharing a room with a sibling of the opposite sex can make a school ages child embarrassed and uncomfortable. Different sleeping arrangements should be made as the child ages.
I underlined the points where it straight up said you should...
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
Wow. Here, we call it a hand up to those truly in need and don't contribute to the stigma around needing help that prevents families who truly *do* need from asking.
Actually Link17 is mostly correct. I applied for subsidized housing because after paying 74% of my salary in income tax, spousal support and child support I was left with $-400 per month (negative $400) to cover rent. However, I was told I don't qualify, because they base it on my gross salary before all of the support is paid. So yes, it's no-daddy row housing as far as I can tell, since 87% of support payors are Dads.

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Exactly. There is nothing that says kids can't or even shouldn't share a room - or even a bed - as long as everyone is happy and comfortable.
Well, someone posted some CAS guidelines that say otherwise. CAS doesn't need to follow legislation, they ARE the law when it comes to abducting children for any reason they see fit.
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Umm.... did you even read what was posted



I underlined the points where it straight up said you should...
"as they age and mature"

"can cause embarrassment"

There is nothing wrong with it as long as everyone is happy and comfortable with it. IF the children are unhappy, uncomfortable or embarrassed, that would clearly not be the case.
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:41 PM
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I think it is a tough subject. This young Mother had CAS called on her from a neighbour that said the kids were never clothed... well her youngest enjoys running around in just his boxers, but whatever. The only issue to be found was that they were sharing a bedroom. She happened to be on welfare as well, as Dad took off and is hiding and has not supported the children in over 3 years. She had 2 follow up visits to make sure the kids had their own rooms. Not sure who she can actually contact regarding this, but this is what she was forced to do and there are not affordable houses available at this time that offer 3 bedrooms.
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