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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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Old 10-28-2014, 11:07 AM
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Default Life After The Motion

As you may be aware, the motion held last week went very well. It took months of sleepless nights preparing, many tears and a boat load of patience.

The judge took his time reading through all of the material and we won the motion (Hate the word "won"). Instead of winning lets just say I can no longer be denied access, I can no longer have OCL report held over my head, I can no longer have secret recordings used against me, my job can no longer be threatened ... the list goes on.

I stuck to the absolute truth from the beginning. Some here doubted that could be possible given what's been done to me. That's exactly the illusion my ex wanted. The allegations were so bad it had to be true.

The canlii on this case will be an exquisite read Im sure (if it makes it there).

NEWS:

Spoke with my lawyer literally seconds ago. She said that LAO lawyer was all of a sudden very settlement focused (i.e - "Well, I guess we can start looking at settlement now"). <--- is what he said.

Judge hasn't finished writing up the order yet but both lawyers know the order and agreed that I'm to pick D3 up at 5:00pm Friday at same meeting spot and drop her off on Monday at 8:00am.

Ex's lawyer said he's talked to ex about this. I've asked that I get a copy of the health card.

So here we go to the next phase .... Will she or wont she show up?

One thing's for sure. I can't wait to see my little girl and go trick or treating. Nothing in this world makes me happier than the thought if seeing her in a few days.

I get to watch Disney movies, read bedtime stories, make eggs in the morning like we used to. Okay .. Ill stop with the gaga stuff. I'm so excited!!

Last edited by LovingFather32; 10-28-2014 at 11:10 AM.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:27 AM
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Congratulations on the progress you've made.

You only asked 1 question. I vote that yes, she will show up with your child on Friday.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:31 AM
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So happy for you. Hope it all goes well. Might want a witness with you to make sure ex does not say you were agressive towards her. But it would need to be someone not family.

The only settlement I would agree to is 50/50 offset CS. Full disclosure of childs address at both parents locations. Communication through Email or one of those communication programs. Also,nail down all holidays. No unenforceable "reasonable" clauses.

Make sure you have a clause about being sick - that still happen etc.

Its been a long road and you have been honest and consistent so in the end it paid off. Now time to get on with your life!
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:36 AM
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I think she will show up...she knows she can only loose custody if she screws this up.
I agree you need someone with you for pickup/drop off. I did this for my son in the beginning until daycare became the place for transition.
You have come a long hard bumpy road and hopefully it gets smoother now for you and your daughter.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
...
So here we go to the next phase .... Will she or wont she show up?
...
I would be prepared, for either way. I hope it goes smoothly for you, but it wouldn't be the first-time that an ex decides not to follow directions from a new motion. (I know, from experience).
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
...
The only settlement I would agree to is 50/50 offset CS. Full disclosure of childs address at both parents locations. Communication through Email or one of those communication programs. Also,nail down all holidays. No unenforceable "reasonable" clauses...
Agreed.
The events leading up to all this, so far, show why this is necessary, for your child.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:40 AM
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Paris:
Agreed. After I spoke with my lawyer this morning .. I now know OP is singing a different tune litigation-wise.

Beach:
Yep. I'll have a witness with me indefinitely.
I do foresee the need for clauses. Forgive me for not giving her the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps I'll cease with my predictions and see what this new turn of events brings.

My lawyer instructed me to send an e-mail confirming "exchange spot, date/times". Also that "my lawyer instructed me Im not to talk to her" and that "I just want things to get to be normal for D3".

Of course I CC'd this to my lawyer as well. My autonomic nervous system did a somersault sending that e-mail. I haven't made contact in 9 months out of fear of false allegations.

In terms of 50/50....I'll seek nothing less.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:46 AM
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"Well, I guess we can start looking at settlement now"

Translation:

"My high stakes, dirty-tricks strategy has completely blown up in my face. I'm going to cut my losses and encourage a settlement, rather than risk my client getting the same EOW anvil that I tried to hang around your neck. Oh, and I'm not likely going to get my certificate extended on this train wreck, so I better wrap this up and move on to my next victim/client"

Very happy for you. Ironically, I don't have my kids for hallowe'en (it's my ex's turn), so I am going to live vicariously through you.
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Old 10-28-2014, 11:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Spoke with my lawyer literally seconds ago. She said that LAO lawyer was all of a sudden very settlement focused (i.e - "Well, I guess we can start looking at settlement now"). <--- is what he said.
IMO if often takes that route, the opposing side will posture, accuse and make all sorts of wild claims in the hopes that you will back down and agree to their demands. As soon as the possibility of trial is presented - things get real, hence the offers to settle.

Best thing to do is exactly what you have done here, prove their allegations wrong with hard evidence, be reasonable and patient ... expect a positive outcome in front of the judge that's all that matters in the end.
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Old 10-28-2014, 01:14 PM
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Haha, settlement.... yeah right - you are going to get offered EoW.

Shared residency will only come about by a judge's order.
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