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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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Old 06-17-2013, 09:22 AM
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Default Father's Day fights

Shared custody, but it wasn't my weekend, so we had a special transfer yesterday morning for father's day, and the ex turned it into a big fight.

No real point to this message, not looking for advice, it just makes me sad. I wish I could have had a nice conflict-free day with the kids. She is not totally to blame, I could have just de-escalated it by giving in to her last minute demands, but either way her actions were designed to hurt me.
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Old 06-17-2013, 10:58 AM
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I picked a flower for myself from my house while i was waiting for my kids which I got kicked out of (exclusive possession) my ex started screaming at me not to pick flowers from her property (I have an agreement to buyout the house in a few months) - I was also always that landscaped etc... and then she screamed at me because i never bought her flowers

My ex is a good ex, she ticks all the "ex" boxes
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Old 06-17-2013, 01:52 PM
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My ex is reasonable most of the time when it comes to custody matters, which made this a bit of a surprise. She tends to value her own interests very highly, which generally means avoiding a custody fight when it is unnecessary (since she won't get any money out of it).

I probably should have just de-escalated, she wanted the fight and I gave her what she wanted. I just wish I knew why she wanted to fight, there's probably an angle that I don't know yet, I'll find out shortly, I always do . She's a lot less sneaky than she thinks she is...
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Old 06-18-2013, 12:31 AM
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pokeman has a little shameless behaviour in the past
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file a vary parenting time statement/claim you get fathers day weekend she gets mothers day weekend, on years there is a schedule collision the weekends are swapped - maybe that will work for you.
best of luck,
pokeman
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