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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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Old 09-23-2010, 05:32 PM
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My first step would be to reply to him that you view them as harassment and coercion...and remind him that any agreement entered into under those circumstances can be later overturned by a court Nice and friendly-like He'll either get the hint and stop, or ramp it up-at which point, yes, inform your counsel.
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:33 PM
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Then I would ignore all subsequent emails...and leave them unread...delete, delete, delete
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by frustratedwithex View Post

My lawyer has asked twice now that all comunication go through lawyers, but I think the STBX thinks it just means that week or maybe that day, because eventually he sends another e-mail.
If your lawyer has already asked this, I would let him/her know about the emails, and the frequency and tone of them.
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:42 PM
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I won't reply directly to him, it doesn't matter how nice and friendly it is, he will then think I want to have a discussion.

So at this time I want to have my counsel tell him I want the clause removed that says there has been "no undue pressure and an imbalance in negotiating of this agreement". I think that is what will get his attention.

Due you think I am now playing his game of making threats?
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:43 PM
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However, because you have children, it makes it a bit tougher of a call...what do YOU want to do about it, given your options?
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:43 PM
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Quote:
Lately he puts the words " without prejudice" in the subject line.
He's trying to be sneaky...

Without Prejudice: is a term used when two parties are in dispute, and one makes a settlement offer to the other. It puts without prejudice on its offer to make it clear that the settlement offer should not be construed as a waiver of rights. Importantly, communication marked without prejudice cannot be used in evidence in court proceedings if the attempts at settlement fail.

I would recommend you forward the latest info to the lawyer, and then send the ex an email back, stating something along the following:

"Please direct any correspondence regarding the current matters under negotiation to my attorney at XXXXXXXXXX. and restrict communications between us to only matters surrounding the children until such time as a final order has been agreed upon.

Also please be advised that I have added "without prejudice" to my email filters, so any further emails marked as such will be automatically deleted"
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:52 PM
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NBdad

Thanks, I know what "without prejudice" means, I just don't know why he is using it. Can his e-mails be excluded from court proceedings, or is that just the communication between lawyers?

I like your suggestion to have his e-mails filtered out and deleted. That e-mail I can send him.

Thanks
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:53 PM
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In your shoes...

If that is where you are at, I would not look at removing the clause. I would forward copies of the email(s) to my counsel with a request that s/he send the following to opposing counsel;

Dear His Lawyer's Name,

On two prior occasions, your client has been instructed to communicate through counsel only as settlement is negotiated. My client received email(s) (attached) on these dates, (list dates), subsequent to this request.

My client feels this is harassment and coercion, and will no longer be negotiating settlement unless these harassing emails are stopped. My client's next step if they continue will be to contact local police to file a formal complaint.

I would appreciate your assistance in ensuring this matter can be negotiated to settlement in a timely manner, and to ensure my client suffers no further harassment.

Regards,

Your Lawyer's Name
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Old 09-23-2010, 06:01 PM
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In an e-mail I sent my lawyer earlier this week I refered to something my STBX sent in an e-mail. I have now received an e-mail my lawyer sent my ex's lawyer about the timing of the latest offer. At the end of the e-mail, my lawyer says, "I have reviewed email my client received directly from your client in the past, the tenor of which I can only describe as menacing, describing the dire consequences of proceeding to court. Emails of this nature are counterproductive and I request that your client direct all communications in respect of the parties’ dispute through counsel."

I didn't request that he do this, but hopefully this will make the ex stop.
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Old 09-23-2010, 06:03 PM
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It ought to...his lawyer will let him know that judges don't look fondly on it, and you could push for more and win costs!
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