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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 11-08-2013, 11:52 AM
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thank you HammerDad

you see i live i Quebec we have the dpj here i called them when they went to investigate her and question her they called her and gave her a week notice before they went over to her place so because she had notice she cleaned up her place and her bf left for the day so when they went over they saw nothing wrong and dropped the case
  #12 (permalink)  
Old 11-08-2013, 11:57 AM
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i also found out here in Quebec someone can do any drugs they want in a house with kids living there as long as they don't do it in the same room as the kids are in. her bf takes drugs. how messed up is that. and i cant do anything about it.
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Old 11-08-2013, 12:01 PM
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they even got busted for growing and selling pot from their basement and still i cant do anything

this is why i am so worried every time the kids are over there
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Old 11-08-2013, 12:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by afraid View Post
they even got busted for growing and selling pot from their basement and still i cant do anything

this is why i am so worried every time the kids are over there
How did you come to know this?
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Old 11-08-2013, 12:53 PM
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the police called me they wanted me to take his and her child into my care because they were taking both of them to jail she spent 24 hours in jail and him a month. they were growing plants in the basement he had the trunk of his car full of packaged pot and they had 4000$ in a safe in the house. but for weeks she kept telling me she had no money and she was having trouble paying her bills.

just 2 months before hand child protective services said there was no danger for the kids and dropped my case go figure.
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Old 11-08-2013, 12:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by afraid View Post
the police called me they wanted me to take his and her child into my care because they were taking both of them to jail she spent 24 hours in jail and him a month. they were growing plants in the basement he had the trunk of his car full of packaged pot and they had 4000$ in a safe in the house. but for weeks she kept telling me she had no money and she was having trouble paying her bills.

just 2 months before hand child protective services said there was no danger for the kids and dropped my case go figure.
Then why didn't you go back to them with this information?
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Old 11-08-2013, 01:00 PM
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Having read your previous posts to get caught up on your situation, I see that she has already moved several times, farther away each time, that she is unemployed and doesn't pay CS or contribute to the travel costs she forces you to incur, and that she ignores the kids during visits and that they suffer while they are there.

If she was a good mother and they enjoyed the visits, I would say do what's necessary, but you've already gone above and beyond, and there has to be a limit.

I would suggest that you agree to keep the court ordered driving distance, to a middle location in the right direction, and that it's her responsibility to meet you there to exchange the children. If she chooses not to, that is her actions that prevent the access, not yours.

However, you should probably also try to facilitate non-physical access. Get the kids doing phone calls and video chat, to keep that parental contact that children need. That might work better for all concerned.

If she takes you to court, just present the past history, including any documentation about how bad the visits are. Have you got a log of the children's reactions to the visits, and what's going on?
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Old 11-08-2013, 01:03 PM
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i did and they told me the children have to be in immediate danger for them to get involved but because the police were involved there was no danger for the kids. now they have moved will they start over again i don't know.

this is a woman that can not deal with kids soon she will have 4 in the same house when the kids visit 2 new born's under the age of 1
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Old 11-08-2013, 01:04 PM
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Then why didn't you go back to them with this information?
I am also curious about this.
  #20 (permalink)  
Old 11-08-2013, 01:06 PM
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If I found out, that my childrens' other home, was busted for being a grow-op, I would put forth an immediate motion to have access reviewed, or supervised, given the situation.

It's weird, that CAS would not have some corrective action/followup based on that...but if CAS was not aiding in this situation...I think a court would side with you (at the time), in regards to this.

Last edited by dad2bandm; 11-08-2013 at 01:07 PM. Reason: Added a thought...
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