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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

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Old 06-18-2013, 07:05 AM
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Quick question.:
Here's my situation now. My ex and I have gone to a verbal agreement over 2 months ago after child support was terminated, that at pay her $1500/Month based on our 2012 incomes. She also at that point owed me about $2500 in over payment of CS/SS. I just wanted to get it all done thru the lawyers and told her just forget about it. She agreed to it. Now, she's trying to go back and say the amount is incorrect and that my lawyer did not include a little over a year in cohabitation. She's telling her lawyer we were together 20 years. We were not! My 1st son was born in Sept. 91. We did not move I together until April 91. I also did a license change of a address search thru the ministry of transportation. Which shows at the end of April 91. We married in October 93. The bottom line is that it's locked up in litigation all over $37/week or $1662/month not to mention she has to pay taxes on this. If this goes to court, whose going to look stupid here. I'm not behind in on time direct deposit every week.
My big question is that I've remarried and have a 6 year old step daughter and her father doesn't pay child support. He can't keep a job. My wife makes the same amount as my ex wife. Would this have any effect on what I pay my ex wife?
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Old 06-18-2013, 09:21 AM
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Your current living arrangement does not impact your child support obligations unless you can prove undue hardship, which would be very difficult demonstrate.
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Old 06-18-2013, 09:48 AM
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Now that CS is ended, she's foreseeing financial difficulties on just SS so she is doing whatever she can think of (and a lawyer can advise her of) to have it increased.

But the time for her to argue over the duration of the marriage/cohabitation and amount of SS is long gone. That was presumably done at the time of separation, based on the situation then, and shouldn't change now. What does your original agreement say about SS? DivorceMate sometimes calculates a max duration for SS (unless you fall under the rule of 65) of about when the youngest child turns 18. So now that CS is done, I'm assuming this has occurred. If her SS entitlement was determined based on her child care responsibilities, those needs are now over and she should be finding employment to support herself.

Your new family arrangements shouldn't have any effect on whatever you agreed on for your previous family at the time of separation.

(Edited to Add)

Dude, I just reviewed your previous posts, and all you ever do is come here to whine about your ex and your situation. We give you a bunch of good advice. Then you come back a bit later, and whine and complain about variations on the same situation! Are you ignoring all our previous advice or what?

Is your agreement signed? What does it say?

Last edited by Rioe; 06-18-2013 at 10:01 AM.
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Old 06-18-2013, 03:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rioe View Post
Now that CS is ended, she's foreseeing financial difficulties on just SS so she is doing whatever she can think of (and a lawyer can advise her of) to have it increased.

But the time for her to argue over the duration of the marriage/cohabitation and amount of SS is long gone. That was presumably done at the time of separation, based on the situation then, and shouldn't change now. What does your original agreement say about SS? DivorceMate sometimes calculates a max duration for SS (unless you fall under the rule of 65) of about when the youngest child turns 18. So now that CS is done, I'm assuming this has occurred. If her SS entitlement was determined based on her child care responsibilities, those needs are now over and she should be finding employment to support herself.

Your new family arrangements shouldn't have any effect on whatever you agreed on for your previous family at the time of separation.

(Edited to Add)

Dude, I just reviewed your previous posts, and all you ever do is come here to
whine about your ex and your situation. We give you a bunch of good advice. Then you come back a bit later, and whine and complain about variations on the same situation! Are you ignoring all our previous advice or what?

Is your agreement signed? What does it say?
Dude, I'm not whining and I have followed some of the advice based on my situation. My agreement has changing based on the children are older and not dependent on support any longer. We are going on the tabled amounts of support. She is not hurting trust me! She HAS a good job at $20/hour plus good benefits. She's self sufficient. I get she's trying to what she thinks she's entitled to. Really! $37 extra/Week. Our agreement for SS is revisited yearly based on our yearly incomes. Her income increased mine decreased. Although her SS is at what I've been giving her with as if I was paying CS. My previous marriage was 17 years no where near the 65 year rule. We were 42 yrs of age at separation.
Oh , when we filed for a motion or a change in support we gave them 30 days to respond and still haven't. My lawyer is in the process to go ahead and have it enforced summary judgement. I think that's what was said. I'm not WHINING. It's all a pain in the ass when ur doing things as your told to do and have been as fair as u can be. As it looks, I'm on the hook to pay at least half or the duration of the duration of the marriage unless she dies, remarries or cohabitates with someone. Or if in the near future a judge decides she's proven she's self sufficient on Her own. Again, my intention is not to come here and whine. I get facts are facts and everyone's outcome is different.
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Old 06-18-2013, 03:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baffled_Dad View Post
Dude, I'm not whining and I have followed some of the advice based on my situation. My agreement has changing based on the children are older and not dependent on support any longer. We are going on the tabled amounts of support. She is not hurting trust me! She HAS a good job at $20/hour plus good benefits. She's self sufficient. I get she's trying to what she thinks she's entitled to. Really! $37 extra/Week. Our agreement for SS is revisited yearly based on our incomes if there is a Quick question.:
Here's my situation now. My ex and I have gone to a verbal agreement over 2 months ago after child support was terminated, that at pay her $1500/Month based on our 2012 incomes. She also at that point owed me about $2500 in over payment of CS/SS. I just wanted to get it all done thru the lawyers and told her just forget about it. She agreed to it. Now, she's trying to go back and say the amount is incorrect and that my lawyer did not include a little over a year in cohabitation. She's telling her lawyer we were together 20 years. We were not! My 1st son was born in Sept. 91. We did not move I together until April 91. I also did a license change of a address search thru the ministry of transportation. Which shows at the end of April 91. We married in October 93. The bottom line is that it's locked up in litigation all over $37/week or $1662/month not to mention she has to pay taxes on this. If this goes to court, whose going to look stupid here. I'm not behind in on time direct deposit every week.
My big question is that I've remarried and have a 6 year old step daughter and her father doesn't pay child support. My wife makes the same amount as my ex wife. Would this have any effect on what I pay my ex wife?
For $37 a week, you both look stupid.....legal fees will eat that quickly.

As for your remarriage it has zero zilch nada to do with your obligations to your ex. Why would it? Your new wife still has an obligation to get support from her ex for her daughter. You still have an obligation to support your ex and any children of the marriage.

Unless, as I said before, you become destitute and want to claim undue hardship, in which case your wife's income is looked at, as they compare the total household incomes of both parties in that case.
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Old 06-18-2013, 04:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DowntroddenDad View Post
For $37 a week, you both look stupid.....legal fees will eat that quickly.

As for your remarriage it has zero zilch nada to do with your obligations to your ex. Why would it? Your new wife still has an obligation to get support from her ex for her daughter. You still have an obligation to support your ex and any children of the marriage.

Unless, as I said before, you become destitute and want to claim undue hardship, in which case your wife's income is looked at, as they compare the total household incomes of both parties in that case.
I'm not stupid. I should of mentioned I or my lawyer filed for the motion of change based on our incomes changed. Her income went up and mine went down. It was cut and dry. It cost me $1500 to get the change. We both went over it all and went by our agreement. I agreed to not go after her for the over Payment just to get it all done in good faith. She's mad because she wants a year and a half of cohabitation which I said amounts to the $37 per week more not to mention the tax she has to pay on that and the cost it's costing her to lock this up in litigation. I'm not the one whining about it just frustrated at what she's doing. Neither of us are destitute.
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Old 06-18-2013, 04:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baffled_Dad View Post
I'm not stupid. ...
I support the other learned posters advice and observations.

I do have one question though...

If you are "not stupid" and totally understand everything and have a lawyer... Why are you posting questions on this forum?

This is not to say only stupid people post questions. In fact, very smart people ask questions on this form. But, they generally the questions come with honest requests for advice and are often followed through with. In most cases, the people asking questions don't have legal counsel to consult with.

Finally, most of your questions have been answered a number of times and if you spent time with the "search" feature on this site you would probably find your answer. Google Search is also a very helpful resource too.

Good Luck!
Tayken
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Old 06-18-2013, 04:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baffled_Dad View Post
I'm not stupid. I should of mentioned I or my lawyer filed for the motion of change based on our incomes changed. Her income went up and mine went down. It was cut and dry. It cost me $1500 to get the change. We both went over it all and went by our agreement. I agreed to not go after her for the over Payment just to get it all done in good faith. She's mad because she wants a year and a half of cohabitation which I said amounts to the $37 per week more not to mention the tax she has to pay on that and the cost it's costing her to lock this up in litigation. I'm not the one whining about it just frustrated at what she's doing. Neither of us are destitute.
You aren't destitute, so that answers your question regarding your new marriage. It has no bearing whatsoever on your obligations.

As for fighting over $37 a week, thats less that $2000 a year, or about half of what you would spend at trial just to get started. Is it worth it? Only you can decide, but you seem to be putting the need to win and be right above the actual costs.
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Old 06-18-2013, 04:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DowntroddenDad View Post
You aren't destitute, so that answers your question regarding your new marriage. It has no bearing whatsoever on your obligations.

As for fighting over $37 a week, thats less that $2000 a year, or about half of what you would spend at trial just to get started. Is it worth it? Only you can decide, but you seem to be putting the need to win and be right above the actual costs.
To add to this comment.

A lawyer is about 250-500 an hour. A motion is about 7.5 hours of work. You do the math OP... Should you lose on your position you could be eating the 7.5 hours * 250-500 an hour + HST of YOUR legal costs and the OTHER PARTY'S LEGAL COSTS.

Penny wise... Pound foolish...

Good Luck!
Tayken
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Old 06-18-2013, 05:49 PM
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AGAIN! I'm not stupid! You who have answered, answered my questions and thank you! It's all good!
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