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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 11-06-2016, 03:24 PM
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Default What Child Support is actually used for....?

My ex-wife received $1200/month in child support for our two young children. (mid/high range table amount)

This weekend, this was the foot-wear they arrived with (attached), along with the explanation that she can't afford to give them footwear and that it is their fault for wearing the shoes out. I know that she buys cheap, used footwear, or gets free footwear from clothing exchanges, etc.

What can be done? Is there a legal definition of some sort that states or implies that she has to provide adequate clothing/footwear for the children? I worry about possible medical implications of inappropriate footwear, not to mention the emotional and psychological impact.
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Old 11-06-2016, 04:48 PM
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Originally Posted by natty2013 View Post
My ex-wife received $1200/month in child support for our two young children. (mid/high range table amount)

This weekend, this was the foot-wear they arrived with (attached), along with the explanation that she can't afford to give them footwear and that it is their fault for wearing the shoes out. I know that she buys cheap, used footwear, or gets free footwear from clothing exchanges, etc.

What can be done? Is there a legal definition of some sort that states or implies that she has to provide adequate clothing/footwear for the children? I worry about possible medical implications of inappropriate footwear, not to mention the emotional and psychological impact.
Just buy them some decent shoes if your concerned, pretty cheap in the grand scheme of things, cheaper than phoning a lawyer about it and less stressful. She might just send them to your place with those shoes to get under your skin?
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Old 11-06-2016, 06:17 PM
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Assume child support is for breast implants and there is not a damn thing you can do about it
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Old 11-06-2016, 06:59 PM
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Really nothing you can do... my step kids show up in stuff like that all the time. We have made sure they have what they need at our house and she can choose to dress them in what she wants at her house. We occasionally send things home, but not often because they always end up coming back in the same stuff.
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Old 11-06-2016, 07:59 PM
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My husband and I learned with his daughters that child support does not include shoes, school trips, pizza day, or tampons.
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Old 11-06-2016, 08:34 PM
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Really nothing you can do... my step kids show up in stuff like that all the time. We have made sure they have what they need at our house and she can choose to dress them in what she wants at her house. We occasionally send things home, but not often because they always end up coming back in the same stuff.
Exactly this. She can dress them how she wishes during her time and you on yours.
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Old 11-06-2016, 08:39 PM
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You are so right but there is not much you can do about it but to buy them proper shoes.
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Old 11-06-2016, 10:41 PM
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I was on the receiving end of this very accusation just 10 days ago. Ex used the very same catch words--mental health and physical health. I simply ignored the email and let him rant. Just let it go; be the better person. As others have said, a payor has no control over what the recipient does with child support. I have paid child support so I know the frustration. My kidlet drags his feet, hence the worn down heels that upset his dad. But Karma paid him a visit the day he sent that email. I had bought kidlet new shoes the night before. Give mom a chance; it's not the end of the world.
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Old 11-06-2016, 11:10 PM
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Feel bad for the kids where they do these types of things...
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Old 11-07-2016, 12:00 AM
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I was on the receiving end of this very accusation just 10 days ago. Ex used the very same catch words--mental health and physical health. I simply ignored the email and let him rant. Just let it go; be the better person. As others have said, a payor has no control over what the recipient does with child support. I have paid child support so I know the frustration. My kidlet drags his feet, hence the worn down heels that upset his dad. But Karma paid him a visit the day he sent that email. I had bought kidlet new shoes the night before. Give mom a chance; it's not the end of the world.
I would think the mother's issues wasn't 'not being given a chance' since she prepped the kid to deliver a long lecture about how she couldn't afford to buy them shoes.
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