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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 02-21-2012, 12:03 AM
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Angry stbx keeps going back on agreements

This is driving me crazy!!!
stbx and his lawyer had sent a letter to my lawyer with an amount of temporary support that we agreed to. Then once agreed to stbx lawyer sent a letter to my lawyer saying sorry can't affford to pay that amount. My lawyer and I went to court in sept 2011. stbx never showed but his lawyer told the judge the amount was too high and said my stbx could only pay half that amount. The judge awarded me the original amount they offered. Still havent seen a penny. In process with fro at the moment. Had case conference in jan. stbx never showed and his lawyer said he must have forgotten about it. (this was a lie as he was telling friends about having to be at case conference in jan) The judge proceeded and told his lawyer to speak to her client as the house had to go up for sale. The judge also asked why he has not paid any support. Her reply was he was trying to pay other bills. The judges reply was support was to be his top priority. Then his lawyer sent a letter to my lawyer agreeing to sell the house with a listing price. I signed the papers with the realtor and then stbx refused to sign saying he won't sell. He has now changed lawyers and has been selling off assets and doing god knows what with the money. My lawyer is filing a motion with the court to have the house sold.

FYI we were married over 23 years and he left a note and moved in with his girlfriend whom he had been having an affair with
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Old 02-21-2012, 07:26 AM
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STOP. Take a deep breath. Go have a cup of coffee and relax.

Better? Now...

1. Regarding support. You have an order, I assume the ex works? Keep pushing forward with FRO. It CAN take a while to get the ball rolling, but just make sure your lawyer gets the arrears owed including in the payments. But you have an order, and you are in the process of getting FRO involved. THAT will come out in the wash. Stop worrying about that part.

2. Regarding the house. He agreed to sign, then went back on his agreement. Direct your lawyer to go back to court, and get a motion to dispense with his permission to sell the home. Bring the paperwork to court. If he shows up, you pull the "I have the paperwork right here, JUST requiring his signature your honor".

3. Is he still living in the home? If so, and you believe him to be selling off assets, then request that you be allowed to go in and document the contents in order to assign appropriate valuation to them. That or request the financial information on the assets you believe to have been sold in the interim so that their value can be assigned during equalization.

It sucks that he's doing that, BUT there is going to be a paper trail on anything of significant value. It will bite him in the ass, and you will simply get a higher portion of equalization in lieu once it's proven. He can only play these games for so long.

Quote:
his lawyer said he must have forgotten about it. (this was a lie as he was telling friends about having to be at case conference in jan
That isn't relevant. Why? Because of this:
Quote:
The judge proceeded
.

You wound up with best case scenario there. He decided not to show up in the hopes of pushing the date, the judge moved forward without him. Ha ha, jokes on him. Had he SHOWN up, he might have had a chance to push the dates further.

Quote:
FYI we were married over 23 years and he left a note and moved in with his girlfriend whom he had been having an affair with
While this is certainly something I can sympathize with, it's not relevant in family court. Canada is NO FAULT. He could have had strings of women, and it has precisely ZERO impact on your case. Venting here = Good Venting this way in court = bad. Just making sure you understand the difference.
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Old 02-21-2012, 10:31 AM
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NBdad you are so right. What a bonus that he didn't show up and there is a way, as you said for her to sell the house, without requiring his signature in light of the games he's played thus far. And so true, the courts don't care about the cheating etc and perhaps the poster knows that and was just venting a little. I say "good riddance" but that aside, I understand the poster's frustration. He does sound like a total pain in the ass.
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Old 02-21-2012, 10:04 PM
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Thank you for the replies. Yes I am aware that it in no fault divorce. Venting about the affair is what I am doing. He is not living in the house. The house actually sits empty and has since July when I moved out. (moved out because of safety issues the house is very secluded long story) He lives with his girlfriend in another house. Thank you for the advice I appreciate it. I did take the have a coffee and breath I know it will all come out in the end and I have a very good lawyer and he is already on the house issue. I did find out today that the case is now registered and I actually have a case number which took 10 weeks which from some of the things I have read on here is not bad at all. Hopefully the support wont be too much longer.

I just get sick of the games that he is playing. Amazing what they try to do to stall.
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