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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 04-10-2013, 08:58 PM
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Default Stbx has made an offer....

Stbx has an offer on the table that gives me a slightly higher monthly amount for now but a potentially lower amount later. I am trying to see if there is something I have missed in all of this but am really leaning towards signing. All of the below is offered regardless of how much money I make a year (and can be lowered if stbx lost job or become disabled) but not increased.

Any thoughts?

Year 1 and 2 - SS $1000 or so monthly but ex will have no child care expenses. (Ex making $70,000 or so at this time.)

Year 3 - Ex has graduated and potentially making $200,000 - $450,000 a year. Ex wants to pay another year of $1000 to establish self and pay off debt. MySupportCalculator says $4,500 - $8,000 a month at this income level.

Year 4 to year 10 - Ex offering to pay $3,000 a month regardless of my income.

Basically my lawyer has said to take it because when ex begins his practice there is no way to determine what spousal will be actually awarded at. I have a very clearly determined entitlement and one based on a "compensatory claim" (I supported him through med school.) but would a status quo be determined by only getting $1000 for 3 years. He said an increase in SS is not always "dollar for dollar."

The above is in addition to table child support. It accounts for 10 years of support from a 15 year relationship. I know it sounds like a ton of money for some (and currently I only make $10,000 a year) but I am trying to figure out what is in my best interest. I feel sort of like I am missing something.

What would you do? Take the sure thing or play a "wait and see game" and try for a larger SS amount once he has his "material change of circumstance"?

Thanks.......

Last edited by SadAndTired; 04-10-2013 at 09:06 PM.
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Old 04-10-2013, 09:14 PM
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I don't know much about SS...but I do know about numbers...

For the first 3 years you are paid $12,000 a year (plus whatever you make)
The the next 7 you are paid $36,000 (plus whatever you make)

In total you are looking at $228,000 over 10 years or $28,800 a year... while it may not seem like a lot, this is guaranteed income (and more than min wage)... if you decide to play the waiting game you are gambling and there is no guarantee you will be rewarded what he is offering. Not to mention if you wait it out, you are still (hopefully) looking to better yourself and find employment. If you find a good paying job, you may find your income goes against you.

To me it seems like your ex is trying to work something out with you and realizes his income will increase when he opens his practice.
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Old 04-10-2013, 09:14 PM
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I am confused. How is it that this amount will potentially go lower later? If he has an accident or something? That is something you cannot control.

Only you and your lawyer can determine if it is an offer from serious consideration because only you two are privy to the details of the case.
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Old 04-10-2013, 09:19 PM
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Spousal should be based on hos current income, not whatifs. Wait the 3 years so he can argue non entitlement based on you being self supporting for that period of time.

How the hell so you make under min wage and expect entitlement to spousal? He's offering you a lot more than I would.

Ss should be determined on his existing 70k and factor on you making at least 18-24k (or whatever full time hours at min. Wage is in your province.)
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Old 04-10-2013, 09:56 PM
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I know it seems like a lot NBDad. I know the risk of posting this information and people responding with disbelief or anger.

The fact is that stbx has made this offer so that I can continue to work part time and take care of the children. He does not want to pay his proportion of child care while I make minimum wage full time. Our children were really struggling and he sees this as a way to get a better tax break than he would with child care expenses.

Quote:
Wait the 3 years so he can argue non entitlement based on you being self supporting for that period of time.
Yes, I've thought of this.

Berner, I worked the numbers too. $228,000 is compared to $450,000 if he pays $7,000 a month (which may end up being mid range later) for the last 5 years.

I am not trying to be greedy. Just trying to make reasonable decisions. It is hard because my kids and I traveled and followed and supported the ex. We gave up everything and sold everything to ensure that he could attend medical school. We moved 9 times in 5 years solely for his schooling. My kids gave up friends they had established and then gave up the new ones, and missed many, many family events.

Of course we envisioned a comfortable future with ex as a physician. I sort of see it as I invested my time, my income and energies into a business. Except the potential income is in his head as education. Even ex's lawyer has agreed that my entitlement is clear due to the above and a few other factors not listed here.

Mom23 - Yes, his income would only lower if ex lost job or became disabled. Obviously in those circumstances, he could not be expected to pay any support. I just didn`t want anyone to think it was iron clad or something.

Last edited by SadAndTired; 04-10-2013 at 10:03 PM.
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Old 04-10-2013, 10:06 PM
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Lousy deal. You must remember that you are taxed on the SS while he gets to claim 100%.

You CAN determine his income at a later date. All your lawyer has to do is get off his ass and draw up an agreement which specifies the documentation he is to submit yearly.

If you do sign it ask for a review in 2 year increments will FULL financial disclosure. You're not a dummy. You can see how his practice is going at that time.

You are correct in looking at the whole thing as a business. You invested in him.

People who are lower income earners have a hard time comprehending this but it is all simply numbers. Many physicians go on to make several million per year. Others do not. In a sense it is a crap shoot and dependent upon where he practices.
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Old 04-10-2013, 10:13 PM
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Get the numbers worked out (7 - 8k/month) and offer to defer payment (basically you'd be bankrolling him again). Tell your lawyer to sharpen the pencil and look at creative ways he can pay you back partially tax free in the future (revenue property, for ex.).
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Old 04-10-2013, 11:00 PM
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I didn't mind NBDad's reaction Oink. As I replied above, stbx doesn't want me to work full time at minimum wage.

He doesn't want to pay his portion of child care. He gets a better tax break if he pays me SS directly and then our kids are taken care of by a parent instead of a babysitter.

Last edited by SadAndTired; 04-10-2013 at 11:11 PM.
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Old 04-10-2013, 11:24 PM
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No problem. It is the only "poking" I've had in 18 months. LMAO.
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Old 04-10-2013, 11:38 PM
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Then you wouldn't want to know about me. It's even worse than Sad and Tired's story. LOL.
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