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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 11-09-2017, 10:49 PM
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They are drafting a consent order and are putting a provision in there about me by being able to adjust support if I lose my job. I'm perfectly fine adjusting yearly that is certainly not an issue.

The sports...I simply stated I will pay my share without consent but they will not be attending their sports on my weekend as we live hours apart. He lawyer stated it would do our relationship well if I made sure I took them to their sports on my time. I disagree I think it does my children well to spend time with me and their sister and grandparents and cousins.

I understand sports are important and I am not refusing to pay my share of them however I only see the kids every other weekend and it would be nice if she respected that and stopped enrolling kids in weekend - time consuming activities.

The budget is to help us eliminate disagreements and with that I did say I will decide what I will do with the kids on my weekends.

Again would a judge even side with me? Probably not. So that's why we're trying to compromise but she is still trying to take control.
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Old 11-09-2017, 10:57 PM
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Would a judge actually not make me pay when I have not been given notice and asked consent? She states I keep refusing but I have not been asked. I can't see a judge actually asking her to prove her efforts . She is a narcissist, she gets away with everything. So i simply offered a budget per child per year. She can do what she wants with the budget re sports. Once budget is maxed out that's it for e till the next year. Is this not reasonable or am i shooting my self in the foot with this suggestion.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:34 PM
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You have stated that you would pay...this somewhat implies your consent as well as your agreement to pay. If you've put this in writing to them, it will surely be brought forward and you will likely be held to it.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
You have stated that you would pay...this somewhat implies your consent as well as your agreement to pay. If you've put this in writing to them, it will surely be brought forward and you will likely be held to it.
What if there was no consultation or agreement prior to enrollment ?

Sports do not generally qualify as section 7 expenses, why you you even offer to pay something you were not consulted for and something that does not qualify as S7. do you enjoy your ex making unilateral decisions? What's next golf and horseback riding?

Do not agree to pay if you lose your job. You will agree to adjust every year based on previous year income. period.

Her lawyers sounds like my ex's lawyer - got yelled at by the judge. I have feeling her lawyer is going to get yelled at too.

Last edited by trinton; 11-09-2017 at 11:39 PM.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:37 PM
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I thought "without prejudice" means they can't use settlement offers in court?

I have never agreed to the specific sport at hand. And I have proof of that in my responding affidavit. I am only agreeing on a max budget for kids sports. It's basically about the money for her.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:40 PM
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Maybe it is time to file the response for my ex and her lawyer to see that my affidavit and proof contradicts every lie stated in hers..maybe then we can get an unreasonable person to be reasonable.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:50 PM
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Maybe it is time to file the response for my ex and her lawyer to see that my affidavit and proof contradicts every lie stated in hers..maybe then we can get an unreasonable person to be reasonable.
Are they filing a motion for the Sports? Or just trying to bully you into settlement ? You can state your side on an settlement conference breif if a SC is all that you are having.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:57 PM
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Yes she filed a motion for the sports. There was a pike of receipts I never knew existed. It's mainly her wanting money, because her affidavit never said anything about trying to force me to take them to their activities.
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Old 11-09-2017, 11:59 PM
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Yes she filed a motion for the sports. There was a pike of receipts I never knew existed. It's mainly her wanting money, because her affidavit never said anything about trying to force me to take them to their activities.
Then you state in your affidavit that she did not consult with your prior to enrolling the children in the activities and only communicated with your when payments were required. You do not agree to the sports being a necessity for the children, are not inline to the families spending patterns, and that they infringe on your weekend parenting times (despite the very limited time that you have). The other parent is demanding that you take the child to these activities on your parenting times and you have no say in it. Accordingly, you are not agreeing to these activities .
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Old 11-10-2017, 12:00 AM
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She is devious though she knew eventually having the kids so busy in activities they will be able to decide when they are 12 if they want to come see me or go to their activities. I didn't want to argue over the money so offered to pay for them all and in return set a maximum budget going forward and that the kids come to me on my wkd regardless.
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