Another question on matrimonial house

[May_May]

HELP !

My ex had a small bungalow that we moved (removed renters) 1 month before we got married. During that period I put worked and contributed to the mortgage, and also put about $50K of upgrades into the house and my name was added to the mortgage/title. We then sold and moved to another town.

He is saying that since he had $100 initially down on the original house, that I am not entitled to anything for the sale of this house as $100 from the down payment on his 'bachelor' house.

Any opinions/thoughts...I'm furious. He was unemployed and I carried him and have always worked (including overtime and multiple jobs to bring in money) over the past 15 years.

Cheers !!!

[Mess]

You only have one matrimonial home at a time.

If you sell your home halfway through the marriage, you generally put that money into the new home. If you sell it and rent, and then spend the money on what ever, then the money is gone.

If you currently own a home in your new town, that is your mat home, and you split that 50/50. He doesn't pay you a cent for your previous home or anything you paid into it.

If there was any money left over from the first sale that went into savings or investments, then this is money that will be included in the equalization anyway.

Your ex is generally right, not because he paid $100 before you married but because the was sold. It is gone, you can't split it now. You can only split the home you have.

[May_May]

Sorry-that should have read $100K.

So he cannot take out $100K from the sale of this new house before equalization correct ? I'm so confused and being bullied right now and am going into the negative every month with my rent for my current house, as well as still supporting half of the marital home/mortgage and insurance etc...

He is stating that as he had that $100K before marriage that he gets it back ?

Originally Posted by Mess

Your ex is generally right, not because he paid $100 before you married but because the was sold. It is gone, you can't split it now. You can only split the home you have.

[Mess]

He will take his total assets minus debt before marriage and compare it to assets minus debt on the date of separation, this is his net gain during marriage. You will do the same. The 100k will have some affect on that calculation, but it would be the same thing as if he had 100k in the bank.

[May_May]

So I get completely 'ripped off' for that initial house and all of the money I put into it for the upgrades, as well as my salary/mortgage payments...UGH !

[Rioe]

But isn't the house exempt from that pre-marriage asset system because it's the matrimonial home?

His column has his increase in assets and debts over the course of the marriage, her column has hers, and everything joint is divided in half. The matrimonial home is always 50-50. Then one person pays the other an amount that makes both columns even. Presto, equalization.

Honestly though, I would be less worried about the matrimonial home, and more worried about the fact that this freeloader is going to get half your pension, and most likely be entitled to spousal support from you for quite some time.

[May_May]

I'm not sure of all the terminology yet, as I've just involved a lawyer and initial letters are going out on Monday. I moved out of the matrimonial home on Jan. 1 as my ex (soon to be officially 'ex'), and he still hasn't bought me out as he said.

He has said that the $100K he put on the initial house is his regardless of the fact that that my name was added to that mortgage and I paid bills, and added to the value/upgrade of the house. This house was sold and both of our names were on the deed...and that entire amount from sale was put into the new house that we bought and had lived in for the past 13 years.

So essentially he is saying that for this new house...if we sell it for $150K...he automatically gets $100K and then we split the remaining $50K 50/50. I just am not sure on what the courts do...personally I do not feel this is just (as I'm sure there are many other men/women in the same position) as I contributed to the mortgage, and substantial upgrades to the original house.

He currently has a job, but yes he could come after me for spousal support as I earn more and could have to compensate his monthly income. Yes my pension will be in jeopardy but I can be thankful I guess that my company only offered self-directed and I lost over 50% from 911 and it's still not back where it was before that tragedy.

Thanks everyone...I appreciate the comments/walk through as I have no clue what I'm doing and never imagined I'd be in this position financially after working for 20 years...

[Mess]

May_May, my mother never worked during the marriage, put no money into the home, but she got half the assets when my parents split after 30 years. Was she a freeloader?

You got married. That means assets were mingled. You split them. Grow up and stop name calling, it won't help you get over your divorce and it won't help in the negotiations.

[standing on the sidelines]

just so you know, I am buying out my ex and my mortgage company will not release any funds until there is a signed separation agreement. Maybe your ex is running into same problem??

[May_May]

Originally Posted by Mess

Grow up and stop name calling, it won't help you get over your divorce and it won't help in the negotiations.

Mess...look through my posts...I haven't done any name calling.