what do you think about these job hours

[iceberg]

Again my company is making changes for some employees including my department.

My child, 5, is with me from Monday evening to Friday evening. Those are her preschool days from 9 am to 1 pm. My parents babysit her for the rest of the day while I am at work.

The new job schedule will be working 7 days a week, 12 hours a day, probably from 7 am to 7:30 pm, and that is from Wednesday to Tuesday, and that's 82 hours of work. Then the next week is off. It is rotation 1 week 12/7 next week off and so on.

What do you guys think of this work schedule and my custody arrangement?

If I had the old custody agreement week on/off this would be great then I would work the week when the child is with the ex but the way things are i am not so sure. It sure is nice to have a week off but what time can I spend with the kid during working days?

[Rioe]

Those hours totally suck! You'll never see her on your working days, and she'll be in preschool for half your days off. Going to week on/off would be a huge negotiation with your ex, and is there any guarantee your work wouldn't change the hours again later? Even if you could change though so you only worked the weeks you didn't have your daughter, she's going to think you don't work because she never sees you go there, and not grow up with the easy knowledge that money must be earned.

Can you ask your work if you can keep to your old hours? Or switch departments? Or trade shifts with a colleague who may also not like the change?

[ddol1]

Tough spot but some times you need to evaluate your need to support your family and your work. Some times this means needing to re-evaluate work and find employment that meets your needs and that of your family. In the end one of the reasons you work is so you can enjoy your time with your loved ones.

I was there once - the company said I was required full nights to "run the welding departments" and I got to bed around three and 4 am - then I got up to see my kids and get them off to school/ mother-in-law and back to sleep for a few hours. I left for work a few minutes before they got home........ then they needed overtime on the weekends to boot. Sometimes you need to make tough choices.

[iceberg]

@Rioe, no I can't change it to my old schedule even though my old schedule was from 6:30 am to 5 pm mon-fri. According to the boss this is a permanent schedule...My ex and I do have a week on/off agreement but preschool changed it....and I am not going to pull the kid out of preschool just because I wanna spend more time with her, best interest for the child is to stay in school....

@ddol1, I am the only one in this department who knows how to run and control a robot welding arm

During the working week I would only have time for maybe a 30 minute play and bedtime story 4 days a week, but during my off work week, I have from 1 pm to bedtime 4 days a week

Maybe I should just look for a job from 7-3:30, but again it is winter time and it darkens around 4 pm......

My ex is so excited she has every weekend with the child but I am still happy I chose preschool because she loves going to school

[ddol1]

from my old life in the area of metal fabrication - you have a neat job that I would think is a very marketable skill as the robotics is the way of the future and the olny way to manufacture and "keep up" with the off shore labour costs that is killing North American manufacturing..... one job at a time.

It is all about choices - and if you both are taking the child first appraoach where is chance of adopting a truely flexable parenting schedule with mom that will still give you both a fair chance at parentingo?

[Mess]

Originally Posted by iceberg

...My ex and I do have a week on/off agreement but preschool changed it....

This is a material change in circumstance. The logic behind the argument for week on/week off is iron clad. Generally a court is not going to support a parent seeking EVERY weekend because that is seen as selfish and not co-operative. If you already have an order/agreement for week on/week off, then you politely inform (but do not ask) the ex that you are returning to that situation and why.

If you don't have that as an order and your ex isn't co-operative, you file a motion to change your existing order, and there no way you will lose. For the ex to insist on the current schedule would mean they are selfishly taking all weekends and you will be seeing your child almost never. That is not in the child's best interests.

[wretchedotis]

Thhis is a no brainer for you.
At least in my opinion.

I think week about is a better option for you anyway.
Weekends are gold, and during the week you aren't as free to be 'super-happy-fun dad' that is seen on weekends when you can relax the rules a little bit.

Sounds like week-about would be a better sitution for both you and child.
at least in my opinion.

[LostFather]

Originally Posted by Rioe

Those hours totally suck! You'll never see her on your working days, and she'll be in preschool for half your days off. Going to week on/off would be a huge negotiation with your ex, and is there any guarantee your work wouldn't change the hours again later? Even if you could change though so you only worked the weeks you didn't have your daughter, she's going to think you don't work because she never sees you go there, and not grow up with the easy knowledge that money must be earned.

Can you ask your work if you can keep to your old hours? Or switch departments? Or trade shifts with a colleague who may also not like the change?

Huh!!! There are tons of families where a parent has to work nights! Meaning the go to work after the children are in bed and get home before they wake up...so these children will not know about having the need to work because they don't see their dad go to work.... I am not sure if that is sound advice or statement.

[iceberg]

My ex and. I negotiated agreement through our lawyers. Its calllled minutes of settlement and is rock solid because the judge signed itzn in fact the judge returned it once for a correction to be made.

So we have it on week about bases. We negotiated where the child will go to preschool, in my area or hers and she lives 30+ minutes away. For number of reasons I thought it is better for the kid to attend it in my area. The ex hesitated but agreed but wants to be with kid the non school days.

If I tell her I want 1 Saturday a week that means she only has the child Sunday and Monday. She won't accept it and the only way to continue week about is to pull the kid out of preschool. I don't think that is in best interest of the child, she needs to be involved with other kids and learn something.

In this new job schedule every second week is golden as from 1 pm to bedtime the kid and I have time to enjoy even I can drive her to and from school that means she gets home at 12.15 better than weekends. BUT THE PROBLEM IS THE WORKING WEEK

[wretchedotis]

pull the kid out of daycare.

it is in the best interest of the child, because it is better to deal with problems early.

Place the child in a preshool that is in between your two residences.

an approximate 15 minute drive for each of you.

consistancy is important for a child, but they are also very adaptable to change. change shouldn't always be a bad thing - especially if it is for a purpose.