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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 11-02-2017, 08:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
Heís not dropping his son off with a backpack... Iím not sure why itís hard to follow his post?
Missed keyword "overnight".
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 11-02-2017, 08:49 PM
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Spending money for lawyers and judges over a backpack? You must have more money to waste on that kind of nonsense than the rest of us. Can't imagine how backlogged (even more) the courts would be having to deal with every child's backpack.
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Old 11-02-2017, 08:56 PM
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Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
Spending money for lawyers and judges over a backpack? You must have more money to waste on that kind of nonsense than the rest of us. Can't imagine how backlogged (even more) the courts would be having to deal with every child's backpack.
Perfect opportunity to vary the access order to allow dad to do pickups from school (if his schedule allows it) don't you think ?
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Old 11-02-2017, 09:03 PM
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And what's the material change there...a backpack???
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Old 11-02-2017, 09:11 PM
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Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
And what's the material change there...a backpack???
Mother's interference with dad's involvement with child's education ? Not so much the backpack itself but more so what is in it. If dad has overnight access with drop off to school then it was presumed child would be going with backpack and any homework. How is dad supposed to do homework ? How is child supposed to complete homework? Projects? What if child has a test to study for ? The mother's behavior (which was not forseen) is determinant to the child's best interests. That's how I would argue it anyways.

He's not flipping the order upside down on it's head.. just a small varyation that lawyers should be able to obtain on consent.

Orders can be changed without material change when it is in best interests of child to do so. Small variation like this.. unlikely they would want a material change.

Last edited by trinton; 11-02-2017 at 09:13 PM.
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 11-02-2017, 09:14 PM
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Or....dad could spend $5 on a backpack instead of thousands on a lawyer. Sheesh.
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Old 11-02-2017, 09:33 PM
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Blink,

Now you have missed the post.

The Mom is being a jerk by withholding the bag and all that goes with it, including the homework and making lunch.

She is trying to diminish the father in the child's eyes. Similar to goal-keeping.

If he can afford to use the lawyer, her behavior should be cut off at the knees and ideally lose some of her time/control in return.
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  #18 (permalink)  
Old 11-02-2017, 09:42 PM
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I didn't miss it. There are just cheaper ways for dad to accomplish the same thing by providing his own, thereby making her efforts both unnecessary and futile. Plus she looks like an idiot showing up with double of evrrything for the kid every day.
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  #19 (permalink)  
Old 11-02-2017, 11:43 PM
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How do parent's get away with that behaviour? That mother is CRAZY. Obviously the child is young enough not to ask for his backpack from his mother so there isn't anything that is too important for him to take the next day. Even I have forgotten books on library day and quite often the 'note tote" and its no big deal. Explain the issue to his teacher and maybe give her/him an email address to communicate to you anything that is required or a must on your day you take him to school. The teacher will certainly do a private eyeroll and probably help you out. I usually take the high road but would purposely be late. Take your son out for breakfast. Call the school to tell them he will be late. You don't owe her an explanation. Keep your phone off so she doesn't hijack your time with your son as she will certainly be in a panic. Control freak. Stand up for yourself and let her know you are an adult and this is your son and it's your day and you can handle it. Buy him a special "dad's house" backpack. Alternately, if you can't pick him up after work check out after school program at school and sign him up. Pick him up at the school like other parents do. Going to your ex's for pick up just isn't working.
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  #20 (permalink)  
Old 11-03-2017, 12:27 AM
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Blink,

Maybe, but she is already acting the fool and thinks she is right. She won't be deterred by subtle behavior modification tactics, IMHO.
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