Parenting Plan

[E-Gal]

Does shared parenting automatically mean joint custody ? I'm trying to fight for sole custody, but my lawyer has drafted it up as us having shared parenting, however it states that I shall make important decisions about the child after making reasonable efforts to consult with ex including decisions about our childs education, religious, recreational, therapy counselling etc..

I'm a little confused. Doesn't that sound like sole legal custody ? and if so, shouldn't that be stated so all parties know, or is it easily understood as that ?

Any assistance would help. Tks

[FamilyBlah]

It sounds like you want Sole Custody with 50/50 Shared Residency.

[iceberg]

Shared physical custody does not automatically mean shared legal custody. You answered your own question.

[Berner_Faith]

What's the reason for wanting sole custody? You shoul be trying for 50/50 access as the other parent has equal right to parent their child as much as possible. I hope your not going for sole custody just because you want to, but because there are reasons that the other parent are not fit to provide for the child for 50% of the time.

My boyfriend has joint custody of his children, with primary residence at their mothers... this means any decisions regarding the children must be made mutually and both parents must agree. I am going to assume your the mother in this situation and would urge you to allow the father to be a part of the childs life as much as possible...if your going to sole custody because you, you are not keeping the childs best interest in mind...unless like I stated there are concrete reasons the father can't have 50/50 parenting.

[blinkandimgone]

Originally Posted by Berner_Faith

What's the reason for wanting sole custody? You shoul be trying for 50/50 access as the other parent has equal right to parent their child as much as possible. I hope your not going for sole custody just because you want to, but because there are reasons that the other parent are not fit to provide for the child for 50% of the time.

My boyfriend has joint custody of his children, with primary residence at their mothers... this means any decisions regarding the children must be made mutually and both parents must agree. I am going to assume your the mother in this situation and would urge you to allow the father to be a part of the childs life as much as possible...if your going to sole custody because you, you are not keeping the childs best interest in mind...unless like I stated there are concrete reasons the father can't have 50/50 parenting.

Custody and Access are NOT the same thing.

[Berner_Faith]

Ok so change my "access" to "50/50 custody" my point still stands... no reason for sole custody if the other parent is a fit parent.

[blinkandimgone]

Yes there is. If there is an inability to communicate between the parents or come to any agreements on anything than it is best if one parent has custody.

This doesn't limit the other parent's access, parenting or relationship with the children in any way whatsoever. Just because someone is a fit parent doesn't mean they are committed to being reasonable with the ex.

[Berner_Faith]

So whose to say that she should be the one to make the decisions? I feel 50/50 should be tried until it fails.

[blinkandimgone]

A lot of people choose to split up the decision making responsibilities. Ie: one parent decides on education related matters and the other on religion related matters.

If parents can't decide together who will be responsible then - like everything else - a judge will decide. Typically though, the parent who is refusing to be reasonable or work towards a solution is NOT the one the judge will choose.

[Berner_Faith]

Originally Posted by blinkandimgone

A lot of people choose to split up the decision making responsibilities. Ie: one parent decides on education related matters and the other on religion related matters.

If parents can't decide together who will be responsible then - like everything else - a judge will decide. Typically though, the parent who is refusing to be reasonable or work towards a solution is NOT the one the judge will choose.

If this works that's great...I am sure everyone here would agree that the best way to do things is to work it out together, rather than getting a third party involved.

I just feel going for sole decision making without attempting to work with the other party is asking for trouble. Original post does not state that either party can't communicate, just that the parent must make every reasonable effort to communicate and agree with the other parent, but again this is all based on personal feelings...if one parent feels very strongly on an issue and the other doesn't they will have a hard time finding common ground.