Parenting Coordination

[Jeff]

Dr Barbara Jo Fidler has generously contributed an article about parenting coordination to our website, which can be found here:
http://www.ottawadivorce.com/parentingcoordination.htm

Parenting coordination is something fairly new. Parenting coordination is a service for high-conflict couples who are experiencing chronic difficulties in resolving parenting issues.

Please note that immediately after separation, it's fairly common for there to be high conflict, especially about parenting issues. However, normally the conflicts are resolved soon afterwards, either with an agreement or a court order. However, for some parents, the conflict continues for quite a long time after separation, and this is where parenting coordination is very helpful.

If anyone has had any experience with or comments about parenting coordination, please feel free to share it here.

[logicalvelocity]

I am a firm believer in Joint Custody regimes. Even if communication has broken down and there is al ot of animosity between the parents, a communication log book could be used to communicate issues regarding the children or child. The children or child will benefit from this as both parent's will be fully informed in all aspects and issues of the child.

Parallel Parenting Plans do work and I speak from experience. The secret is to make it work and put the differences aside and most of all be child centred.

Responsibilities can be divided up

One parent schooling

Other parent medical

One parent religion

Other parent extra curricular

etc

You could also have something like if you can't see eye to eye on a certain issue, mandatory mediation

[dinkyface]

Anyone notice a conflict of interest in how parenting coordinators are appointed? i.e. Parenting coordinators rely on lawyers for client referrals, therefore, a parenting coordinator is liable to the ongoing influence of that lawyer. You can end up with a parenting coordinator being the puppet of a lawyer. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to see which lawyers are providing clients for a given PC?

At the same time PCs have so much latitude in how they act, and are seen as inscrutable by the court system. On personal experience, I have found that
- the parenting coordinator is not willing to conduct themself according to the terms of the agreement on which they were hired.
- the parenting coordinator takes too long to resolve issues
- parenting coordinator steps back, saying 'well you have a legal remedy for that' when asked for help in enforcing part of a court order that one parent is refusing to honour

So....what value exactly is there? How is this better than just going back to court? (i.e. you have to pay $$ for a wildcard judgement that comes months after the issue arises)

[farooq]

Just had some 'interesting' experiences with the parenting coordinator we hired (it was someone proposed by my ex's lawyer).

She stated - IN EMAIL - that the parenting coordination agreement that we signed (i.e. the terms under which she agrees to conduct herself) are not really relevant, and what was DISCUSSED with the lawyers (um, maybe in particular the lawyer who refers her?) was really what drives the process.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER!!!!!

This is coming from someone who is an licensed arbitrator/mediator, who should have some basic understanding of the principles of justice.

[piggybanktoex]

You can not trust a lawyer to look out for your best interests. If it's signed and in good order, lawyer approved, then you live by the printed word.