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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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Old 02-19-2017, 12:50 AM
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Default parent/teacher interview questions/answers

is it best to email teachers questions directly about report cards and seek answers or does it make more sense to meet with teacher directly and ask and seek answers?


I know the pros of email is that everything is written in rock and everything is documented and can be referred to at a later date, and in case someone forgots what they said

I know the pros of in person is that you get a better experience, can discuss things in person, but things can be forgotten or misinterpreted

Just wanted to hear how most parents handle this ? My gut feeling is to just have an in person meeting
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Old 02-19-2017, 11:58 AM
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Generally, teachers are not idiots, so by email you get the official party line. In person you are more likely to get the truth. However, as you indicated, harder to get a teacher in trouble for something they say in person.

So, I would say it depends on your goal. If you are hoping to get the teacher in trouble, then use email. If you are making demands that a teacher might later not follow, use email. If you are trying to get information, then I would go in person.
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Old 03-01-2017, 12:49 PM
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What about sending email, with your questions, and a request to disuss in person then asking that a summary email be sent to you so you can forward to your spouse / ex? (if you do it's up to you). Or send the summary email yourself and ask that they send a reply to confirm?
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Old 03-01-2017, 02:09 PM
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Why not just cc your ex on everything? Teachers don't like being drawn into divorce battles. What is there about the kids' report cards that you don't want the ex to know about?
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Old 03-01-2017, 10:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Asphenaz View Post
What about sending email, with your questions, and a request to disuss in person then asking that a summary email be sent to you so you can forward to your spouse / ex? (if you do it's up to you). Or send the summary email yourself and ask that they send a reply to confirm?
^^^ E-mail first with your inquiries and include a request to set up a meeting. A summary e-mail would be a nice touch for future reference in a court room.
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Old 03-03-2017, 04:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stripes View Post
Why not just cc your ex on everything? Teachers don't like being drawn into divorce battles. What is there about the kids' report cards that you don't want the ex to know about?
In some cases, cc'ing ex on everything may draw the teacher or kids into the divorce battle. A concern may be viewed by the ex as an attempt to 'create' or 'find' evidence, leading to them questioning the children (unneeded stress) or wanting their 'own' meeting with the teacher to defend themselves.

Above all like stripes pointed out, avoid any situation where your ex or teachers will think you are hiding something.
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Old 03-07-2017, 09:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trinton View Post
is it best to email teachers questions directly about report cards and seek answers or does it make more sense to meet with teacher directly and ask and seek answers?





I know the pros of email is that everything is written in rock and everything is documented and can be referred to at a later date, and in case someone forgots what they said



I know the pros of in person is that you get a better experience, can discuss things in person, but things can be forgotten or misinterpreted



Just wanted to hear how most parents handle this ? My gut feeling is to just have an in person meeting

What is your goal in talking to the teacher? To gather evidence about your child to use in court to prove your ex is neglecting something or is responsible for something in the child's academic achievement or behaviour? To question the teacher's practices? To just genuinely find out about your child's progress? I would give you different advice depending on the answer to those questions...and I am a teacher who has been drawn into divorce/custody bs often in my career...



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Old 03-07-2017, 10:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
What is your goal in talking to the teacher? To gather evidence about your child to use in court to prove your ex is neglecting something or is responsible for something in the child's academic achievement or behaviour? To question the teacher's practices? To just genuinely find out about your child's progress? I would give you different advice depending on the answer to those questions...and I am a teacher who has been drawn into divorce/custody bs often in my career...



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just to genuinely find about my childs struggles. it's been done and over with. met with teacher and he shared his comments with me which answered the questions I had for him.

have you ever had to speak with the OCL?
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Old 03-08-2017, 07:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trinton View Post
just to genuinely find about my childs struggles. it's been done and over with. met with teacher and he shared his comments with me which answered the questions I had for him.

have you ever had to speak with the OCL?


Not me directly but my emails and anecdotal notes have been used.


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