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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 01:55 PM
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Originally Posted by trinton View Post
You know porno can't be that bad. it teaches your kids people can have sex with people of different races. Tayken would say
It's educational. After all, at 8, they should be learning the birds and the bees and where babies actually come from. What better way to teach than to let them see it in the raw?
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 02:15 PM
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Originally Posted by OttawaDad11 View Post
It's educational. After all, at 8, they should be learning the birds and the bees and where babies actually come from. What better way to teach than to let them see it in the raw?
LOL. Glad to see someone else has a sense of humour.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 04:14 PM
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Originally Posted by trinton View Post
You know porno can't be that bad. it teaches your kids people can have sex with people of different races.
The problem with porn isn't the sex. The problem with porn is the sexism and at times outright misogyny, the unrealistic depictions of female bodies and of sexual activities, and the frequent nonreciprocal or nonconsensual nature of the sex acts shown in the videos. These are concepts that are difficult for adults to fully grasp, let alone prepubescent children or teenagers.

If I was ready to tackle these topics with my kids, then I would consider it. However, I don't think that I'm a good enough parent to pull it off, and as a divorced father with an aggressive ex it is super risky to try. That's not a good thing, my kids will see porn, and they will likely see it before they are 18. Likely, they will see it with their friends, who will provide a substantially lower quality framework of understanding than the one I can provide.

A movie with sexual scenes that are mostly realistic and consensual? Bring it on. Nudity? Absolutely, I would love the opportunity to discuss unrealistic body imagery.

That said, I saw porn alone when I was young, and I survived and became a mostly balanced adult.
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 08:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
Bing. Couldn't have said it better myself.

What the "right fighters" are looking for is something to fight over. If it is conflict they seek then, tell the other parent how to parent. Conflict will never end. Conflict addiction is thick with some posters.

So you are suggesting your post was sarcastic? How am I supposed to know? I don't know you well enough to know the tone of your posts.

I'm not a right fighter or looking for anything to fight over. Once again, I was simply asking of the appropriateness of it all in relation to my time - nothing to do with the ex's time. It isn't something I am going to fight with her about.

There is no conflict or conflict addiction. Just a simple question of whether it is appropriate or not for 8 year child. I very clearly stated my concern was that
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child bugging me to be able to do same here.
Where in my post was there any indication that I was trying to control or indirectly or directly try to infringe on an control the other parents time ?
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  #25 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 09:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
Ignorant question from the OP. The OP can talk a good game about not wanting to control the other parent but, their motive is transparent.
I am only trying to hear about the opinion of parents about the game so I am making the right decision about what I allow on my time. I am aware I can't control the other parent's time and that is not my motive.

Perhaps you have mistaken me to be the mom wanting to control the ex, where I am the dad, wanting to do the right thing on my time.

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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
Really. Ruined? Maybe they may start liking heavy metal. Gasp! EVIL! Maybe they will grow up to be Satanists. Interference doesn't require physical presence.

Its called "indirect interference"... Parenting Time Interference



Ratings are guidelines. They are not the law. They are also set by a bunch of idiots.

I am with Dee Snider on all this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0Vyr1TylTE

Page 73

Good Luck!
Tayken
What does me asking about whether it is appropriate or not for an 8 year old have anything to do with the other parents time?

Oh the irony of you saying that I am a right fighter where it is clearly you that is the right fighter just thickened with conflict and where each and any question has a bad intent and is just about controlling the other parents time. I guess I don't blame you if the majority of the parents are trying to control the other parents time. But that was not and is not my intent, and I just want to make sure I am making the right decision during my time. There really is no evidence to the contrary.

If you can answer the question, that would be helpful, if you can't, then you're not really being helpful.
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  #26 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 09:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
Ignorant question from the OP. The OP can talk a good game about not wanting to control the other parent but, their motive is transparent.

Its called "indirect interference"... Parenting Time Interference

I don't see how OP asking about the appropriateness of a media content for when the children is with them translates to indirect interference. In fact I have reviewed your link and don't see how any of the items below account to OP making a decision on whether they are going to watch the same shows in their home that the custodial mom does. In a way, if that was the case, that would really be the custodial parent controlling the non custodial parent's time, and interfering with their time,as there may be other media content that they would want to be exposed to on THEIR time. Do you see where your argument falls apart there? Each parent is free to do what they want to do with their kids on THEIR time. If they don't want to watch FNAF, then they don't have to - it does not in any way imply that OP is trying to control custodial mom's time or interfere with her parenting. He is free to decide (and make a decision without the custodial moms input) as to what media content will be allowed or not allowed in his home.

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For example, a parent may interfere with the other's rights by disrupting communication between parent and child. Refusing to allow a child to accept calls from a parent often constitutes unacceptable interference. Similarly, preventing a parent from participating in a child's school or extracurricular activities may count as interference.

Disparaging the other parent, asking the child to report on or "spy" on the parent's personal life, or attempting to make the child refuse to see its other parent can all constitute interference

Last edited by trinton; 10-17-2017 at 09:31 PM.
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 09:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Janus View Post
I told my kids that the game had jump scares and a moderately disturbing storyline, and let them decide. They chose not to play, but had they chosen otherwise I would have let them play.

When something is forbidden, it becomes enticing.
Thank you for answer my question, staying relevant, and not going on tangents. Not sure what is up with other poster who went on all crazy on 3-dimensional tangents with their imagination and wild thoughts.
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 11:09 PM
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
Not the video game, but rather the music videos on youtube, would you say they are appropriate for an 8 year old ? Other parent allows child to watch them at their house and child bugging me to be able to do same here.

What about the characters being used as a halloween custom ?

There is a scary story behind five nights at freddys of children being murdered and turned into amatronics - which I am not sure if child knows or not, but may have heard about it at school or daycare.

Child isn't having nightmares or anything, but just want to hear what everyone elses thoughts are
I'd simply set rules for your house. What other parent does in their home you cannot control. Might be a good time (while child is younger) to let them know that you do, indeed, have different rules than the other parent and expect them to be adhered to. Difficult for sure. Parenting is difficult even with intact families. It's kind of like when child says "Dad my friends are allowed to do this" and you have to parent and say "that is fine but in our family we do not do that."

Through your stance (on whatever you are trying to instill) you are showing your child, by your own actions, that you aren't a push-over... and you stand your ground. A valuable lesson I'd say (unless you are ok with letting the other parent set standards for you to follow for the next 10 years....)
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2017, 11:14 PM
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
I think there is a misunderstanding on the question.

Not interfering on her time, but definetly don't agree to child also watching family guy and Grand theft auto youtube videos with her mom. Will I call CAS? NO? WIll Cas care and do anything? Who knows.

My question, what are YOUR thoughts on five night at freddys youtive song videos? Have a look and let me know. SHould I (as in me, not her) be allowing this at my house? If I do, and allow her to wear the character's customes, could the other parent turn around and say I am allowing child exposed to innappropriate content ?

Basically, forget the ex, the question is about my time. The OCL is involved and I don't want any wrong moves on my end.

It matters little what the collective here think of things. What do you think is appropriate? If you are uncomfortable with letting your child watch the stuff on TV then simply enact a rule that at your house it isn't allowed. Kid can see it at the other parent's place. Stand your ground and show your child you are an independent thinker... balls and all. LOL
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2017, 10:56 AM
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Blah blah blah... Arabian has proved the appropriate advice already. My point about wanting to continue conflict is supported by the multiple responses from the OP. Looking to debate everything... Typical response from someone addicted to conflict.

To this I say:

PICKLE RICK!!!!!!!

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