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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 06-18-2014, 09:49 AM
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"He insists on doing everything through his lawyer, all communication, annual exchange of financial etc."
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Old 06-18-2014, 09:58 AM
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He believes he has a reason to mistrust you I imagine.

I don't like the idea of letting him push you around but it might be a good slap in the face for him if you get a confirmation of your work schedule via an email or something informal from work to put him in his place.

Apparently, word on the street is that some people are crazy so if he has NO "good" reason to mistrust you then I agree ignore but at the end I don't see the harm in providing 3rd party evidence - given that this isn't something he always does - perhaps say you'll do it only this time but never again
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Old 06-18-2014, 10:01 AM
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What a waste of his money. Let them huff and puff, ignore his demand. I ignore asinine lawyer letters on a regular basis. Her schedule has been provided already

Amusing that he insists she "parent" the children during her time while he sets a different level of parenting for himself.



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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 06-18-2014, 10:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
He believes he has a reason to mistrust you I imagine.

I don't like the idea of letting him push you around but it might be a good slap in the face for him if you get a confirmation of your work schedule via an email or something informal from work to put him in his place.

Apparently, word on the street is that some people are crazy so if he has NO "good" reason to mistrust you then I agree ignore but at the end I don't see the harm in providing 3rd party evidence - given that this isn't something he always does - perhaps say you'll do it only this time but never again
I disagree.

Husband in this case is high conflict drama monster. If you feed the monster, the problem will grow.

A polite, brief NO is what is required.
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Old 06-18-2014, 10:04 AM
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"I work for a very low-profile/high risk crisis centre whose location and information is only available through police/hospital and other emergency services, we do not share any information that is not absolutely required with the general public to protect the location of our facility, the staff and clients. We are not even open at night, my schedule has not changed in a year and a half and isn't likely to change in the foreseeable future. Nothing has changed at all but his lawyer is all of a sudden demanding proof of my schedule. They are more than happy to take me to court.

I just really want to know if they are even entitled to ask for it, and if a judge would order my employer to provide it?"
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Old 06-18-2014, 10:17 AM
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So let me get this right

- You have 50/50
- You only work on the days he has the kids
- Ex works days and requires before and after school care for the kids on his time
- He wants a letter from your employer telling him you only work when he has the kids

You must have an idea why he wants this information. What is his end game? Is he just a crazy control freak?

Letter to lawyer,

Thank you for your inquiry regarding my employment and hours of work. As has been previously communicated to you on MMDDYY, My work schedule is as follows.

[work schedule]

I'm sure that this information will satisfy your request. I nor my employer are legally required to produce an official letter to you regarding my employment status or hours of work. If you feel you are legally entitled to this information please obtain a court order requesting such.

Signed,

Have a nice day.
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Old 06-18-2014, 10:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FB_ View Post
So let me get this right

- You have 50/50
- You only work on the days he has the kids
- Ex works days and requires before and after school care for the kids on his time
- He wants a letter from your employer telling him you only work when he has the kids

You must have an idea why he wants this information. What is his end game? Is he just a crazy control freak?

Letter to lawyer,

Thank you for your inquiry regarding my employment and hours of work. As has been previously communicated to you on MMDDYY, My work schedule is as follows.

[work schedule]

I'm sure that this information will satisfy your request. I nor my employer are legally required to produce an official letter to you regarding my employment status or hours of work. If you feel you are legally entitled to this information please obtain a court order requesting such.

Signed,

Have a nice day.
^^^ this.

You are not obligated to provide your work schedule. You are entitled to work, whether or not it is your parenting time.

Simply have your lawyer send a letter confirming your work schedule and advise them that you will not entertain any further requests for your schedule as they are immaterial.
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  #18 (permalink)  
Old 06-18-2014, 10:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FB_ View Post
So let me get this right

- You have 50/50
- You only work on the days he has the kids
- Ex works days and requires before and after school care for the kids on his time
- He wants a letter from your employer telling him you only work when he has the kids

You must have an idea why he wants this information. What is his end game? Is he just a crazy control freak?

Letter to lawyer,

Thank you for your inquiry regarding my employment and hours of work. As has been previously communicated to you on MMDDYY, My work schedule is as follows.

[work schedule]

I'm sure that this information will satisfy your request. I nor my employer are legally required to produce an official letter to you regarding my employment status or hours of work. If you feel you are legally entitled to this information please obtain a court order requesting such.

Signed,

Have a nice day.
"Thank you. Yes, he is a crazy control freak which is why our marriage ended, and also how I ended up in my current line of employment. He can't stand that the end of our marriage was my choice and not his, and even moreso hates that my line of work empowers other women to leave their abusive and controlling situations. He has very strong beliefs in this regard and does everything to attempt to maintain some kind of control over me because he cannot force me to be dependant on him anymore. Thank you for the advice, I will do just that."

Quote:
Originally Posted by HammerDad View Post
^^^ this.

You are not obligated to provide your work schedule. You are entitled to work, whether or not it is your parenting time.

Simply have your lawyer send a letter confirming your work schedule and advise them that you will not entertain any further requests for your schedule as they are immaterial.
"Thank you for the advice as well. I will send him an email like that (I don't have a lawyer, haven't needed one for years since we divorced and don't share his desire to have one ready to go at all times)."
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  #19 (permalink)  
Old 06-18-2014, 12:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Serene View Post
He is asking because of the maximum contact law. I personally would provide your ex a statement to the effect that you understand the maximum contact law and that you do not work typically during your parenting time.

Then leave it alone.

Demand or no demand - that will not dictate costs. And I can't understand why you contemplate court, costs or not, if you didn't have to go.
I do not believe Maximum contact law would apply,here. From what I have read this particular ruling is more inline with ensuring that both parents are afforded maximum contact and that both parent are willing to facilitate that access.
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  #20 (permalink)  
Old 06-18-2014, 12:48 PM
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As I understand it and as was explained in the court by the judge to my husband (I was in attendance). The maximum. Contact law is applicable at all times. Mom even asked "what about if the children are sick. Or if it is a snow day from school, or a PA day..." and the judge explained that the children could not be with the grandparents, step mother and/or other siblings if the other parent wanted the children. As such it was written into the order like that.

But sibling, stepparent and grandparent can take kids to doctors apps, etc. But can't take these days to "have fun" with the kids. Makes no sense to me. But then again, I'm not the judge.
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