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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 06-18-2014, 12:30 AM
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Default Working during parenting time?

received this question via PM from a member who wishes to remain anonymous :

my ex-husband has an issue with me working, especially during the time the children are with me, he is very old fashioned and believe women belong at home, especially once they have kids.

We have joint custody and 50-50 shared, no CS exchanged as our incomes are on par. we have the kids in a daycare program for before and after school for his time with the kids to accommodate his work schedule, but my work schedule is arranged such that I don't have to work when I have the kids with me, aside from the occasional pick up shift if someone is sick.

He is now, through his lawyer, demanding I provide a letter of proof from my employer detailing my work schedule in an effort to have our schedule with the kids changed if I am working. I don't feel it should matter, given that HE is able to work during his kid time, and my employer feels it is private internal info that they aren't entitled to.

I have provided him with my work schedule as of when it changed a year and a half ago. can they demand this and am I obligated to provide it? He is threatening to take me to court to disclose if I refuse. Would a judge even order that?

thanks!
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Old 06-18-2014, 12:38 AM
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Links should read this post and see that it's not always the woman who doesn't want to work - this is probably not an uncommon issue nowadays.

I'd let the husband take her to court and pay costs.

Operative word here is "ex" is demanding this and that. I wonder if the "ex" would prefer for the mother to stay home and not work? Is he prepared to compensate for lost wages I wonder?
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Old 06-18-2014, 01:49 AM
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I'd be putting that request in the ignore pile.

Does he has first right of refusal for child care? i.e. if he isn't working he gets the choice to take the kids as opposed to a sitter.....
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Old 06-18-2014, 06:45 AM
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He is asking because of the maximum contact law. I personally would provide your ex a statement to the effect that you understand the maximum contact law and that you do not work typically during your parenting time.

Then leave it alone.

Demand or no demand - that will not dictate costs. And I can't understand why you contemplate court, costs or not, if you didn't have to go.
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Old 06-18-2014, 07:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blinkandimgone View Post
received this question via PM from a member who wishes to remain anonymous :

my ex-husband has an issue with me working, especially during the time the children are with me, he is very old fashioned and believe women belong at home, especially once they have kids.

We have joint custody and 50-50 shared, no CS exchanged as our incomes are on par. we have the kids in a daycare program for before and after school for his time with the kids to accommodate his work schedule, but my work schedule is arranged such that I don't have to work when I have the kids with me, aside from the occasional pick up shift if someone is sick.

He is now, through his lawyer, demanding I provide a letter of proof from my employer detailing my work schedule in an effort to have our schedule with the kids changed if I am working. I don't feel it should matter, given that HE is able to work during his kid time, and my employer feels it is private internal info that they aren't entitled to.

I have provided him with my work schedule as of when it changed a year and a half ago. can they demand this and am I obligated to provide it? He is threatening to take me to court to disclose if I refuse. Would a judge even order that?

thanks!
95% of this useless - all that matters is this

Quote:
He is now, through his lawyer, demanding I provide a letter of proof from my employer detailing my work schedule
If you suspected he was working night shifts and putting the kids with a babysitter all his custodial time you'd have the right to know. This would also be grounds for a change in custody given you aren't as available as you were when the custody order was made.

So provide him your work schedule

If he starts complaining about normal amounts of childcare then tell him to stuff it.
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Old 06-18-2014, 07:58 AM
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Links has hit this on the nose.

The bigger issue is that this is easily resolved with mom providing her work schedule. You're either part of the problem or part of the solution.
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Old 06-18-2014, 08:37 AM
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"Work schedule HAS been provided and the schedule is NOT, nor has it ever been, over night. What he's asking for is my employer to provide a letter saying I'm not lying about my schedule. My shifts are during the day when the kids are at school. "
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Old 06-18-2014, 08:46 AM
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" I share the cost of his childcare, I don't incur any costs for childcare."
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Old 06-18-2014, 08:47 AM
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Considering your work rarely involves having to work when you have the kids and his does I would tell him that he can screw off (not in those words). The kids are in care during his time with them.

There is no reason why you should have to get your employer to write you a letter. You told him your schedule and if he doesn't want to believe you then he can take it to court.
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Old 06-18-2014, 09:28 AM
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^I concur. I would ignore the request and file in the trash bin. Not worthy of a response.

It looks as tho your custody/access issues are finalized, why does one parent still have a lawyer on retainer?
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