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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 03-13-2014, 03:03 PM
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Default Wording in a separation/parenting agreement.

Hello all,

Well I am back at it and this time mostly just to finalize a "new/revised" parenting agreement.

We have been joint custody since day 1 and 50/50 for the past 21 months.

Ex's lawyer has done up the draft.

In it, it states:

1. **** & **** will continue to have joint custody of ****.
2. In the event of a disagreement between the parties, **** will have final decision making authority.

That means my ex.

Is this proper agreement "etiquette"? Why should she get final say? Not sure when this will come up where we disagee on something that is not listed. But should I "fight" this when we meet? Should I propose a third party make the decision?

Note: Later in the agreement it also states that we will make "important decisions about welfare together. Including: education, major non-emergency health care, major recreational activities and religious activities. If the parties cannot agree, **** will have final decision making authority".

Once again, meaning my ex.

SO what's the point in having Joint Custody if she just gets final decision making at the end of it all. Shouldn't a third party decide if we don't agree?

Trust me, she's not a nice "lady", abuses the system like no tomorrow and will do anything to get any penny out of me and loves to have any muscle over me.

Any advice on what to do or say at our 4 way meeting, with lawyers? Or is this the proper way of doing things?

Thanks
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Old 03-13-2014, 03:22 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,702
DowntroddenDad will become famous soon enough
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by skins56 View Post
Hello all,

Well I am back at it and this time mostly just to finalize a "new/revised" parenting agreement.

We have been joint custody since day 1 and 50/50 for the past 21 months.

Ex's lawyer has done up the draft.

In it, it states:

1. **** & **** will continue to have joint custody of ****.
2. In the event of a disagreement between the parties, **** will have final decision making authority.

That means my ex.

Is this proper agreement "etiquette"? Why should she get final say? Not sure when this will come up where we disagee on something that is not listed. But should I "fight" this when we meet? Should I propose a third party make the decision?

Note: Later in the agreement it also states that we will make "important decisions about welfare together. Including: education, major non-emergency health care, major recreational activities and religious activities. If the parties cannot agree, **** will have final decision making authority".

Once again, meaning my ex.

SO what's the point in having Joint Custody if she just gets final decision making at the end of it all. Shouldn't a third party decide if we don't agree?

Trust me, she's not a nice "lady", abuses the system like no tomorrow and will do anything to get any penny out of me and loves to have any muscle over me.

Any advice on what to do or say at our 4 way meeting, with lawyers? Or is this the proper way of doing things?

Thanks
Why O why would you trust your ex's lawyer. He/she works for your ex not you.

What they are proposing is sole custody, in fact if not in words.

Don't do it. Say no.
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Old 03-13-2014, 03:29 PM
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I don't trust anyone. The proposed agreement will be discussed in 2 weeks, in a 4 way with our lawyers.

That's exactly what I am saying. How should I go about letting them know I will not agree to that part? Generally if two parties can't agree, who makes final decision? A third party?

And what should the parenting agreement state? How should I ask to have it revised?
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Old 03-13-2014, 03:43 PM
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Use the quebec model, equal decision making and can seek the intervention of the court in case of intractable disagreement

Personally I would specify certain remedies should a parent fail to consult with another parent. I.e: signing up to an activity alone (they pay themselves) -
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Old 03-13-2014, 03:46 PM
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Location: Hamilton
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HammerDad will become famous soon enough
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You could propose that if neither party agrees, one gets final say in one thing (like education) and the other gets final say in another (like health). You could use various combo's of:

extra-curricular activities
medical decisions
religion
education

etc.

Or, you could suggest that in the event both parties cannot agree, they shall use the services of a parenting coordinator at their mutual cost. It may get expensive to go this route though.
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