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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 05-09-2014, 08:03 AM
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Janibel, it's a full time job dodging her BS and abuse. She goes out of her way to haunt us and she is now a victim of her own behaviours. So are the kids. We don't go places when we have the kids if we think or she tells us she will be there. Because she is inappropriate and abusive. This is not just us being uncomfortable in her presence. This is us trying to avoid more conflict and spare all the children (mine, theirs and ours) from witnessing hate and stupidity. The kids - all of them, often go without.

If I see her car at the grocery store I do not go in. I cannot lead my Beaver group sometimes because she wants to be there. We take days off work to take kids to doctor's apps and she shows up anyhow - because it's a way to get close to us. Its a way to stir the pot and say something stupid to us. The six year old behaves better than she does.

And the children are forever learning from her. They are growing manipulative as their role model is a master manipulator. Children aren't born deceitful - they are taught those behaviours.
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Old 05-09-2014, 12:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Serene View Post

And the children are forever learning from her. They are growing manipulative as their role model is a master manipulator. Children aren't born deceitful - they are taught those behaviours.
I used to worry a lot about how my STBX's shanannigans would affect our son - kids pick up fast on bad behavior (it's easier). As he grew in maturity, he figured out what his father's negativity and abuse led to. The old man is bitter, lonely and spends his waking hours trying to convince people that he's a good guy (nobody buys it lol). Nowadays he wants nothing more to do with him.

You're kids see you as a role model as well - don't ever forget that. As time goes buy they will appreciate the consistency and security that your positive parenting give them. Love and respect will be your reward in the long term.
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