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Old 04-01-2013, 09:38 PM
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Default Warning signs of behaviours exhibited by child,alienating parent & rejected parent

The following was taken from the following case law
A good case for information on PAS.
A.G.L. v. K. B. D., 2009 CanLII 943 (ON SC)

[92] Pathological child alienation, then, can be summarized from the evidence as follows and
as contained in Ex. 8B, p. 20 in the trial:
TABLE 15
PATHOLOGICAL ALIENATION:
WARNING SIGNS OF BEHAVIOURS EXHIBITED BY CHILD,ALIENATING PARENT & REJECTED PARENT
Child behaviours:
- View of parents one-sided, all good or all bad; idealizes one parent and devalues the other
- Vicious vilification of target parent; campaign of hatred
- Trivial, false and irrational reasons to justify hatred
- Reactions and perceptions unjustified or disproportionate to parent's behaviours
- Talks openly to anyone about rejected parent's perceived shortcomings
- Extends hatred to extended family and pets (hatred by association)
- No guilt or ambivalence regarding malicious treatment, hatred, etc.
- A stronger, but not necessarily healthy, psychological bond with alienating parent than with rejected parent
- Anger at rejected parent for abandonment; blames him/her for divorce
- Speech is brittle, a litany; obsessed; has an artificial quality; affect does not match words; no conviction; unchildlike, uses adult language; has a rehearsed quality
- Stories are repetitive and lacking in detail and depth
- Mimics what siblings report rather than own experience
- Denial of hope for reconciliation; no acknowledgement of desire for reconciliation
- Expresses worry for preferred parent, desire to care for that parent; or, defensive denial that child is indeed worried about parent

Alienating Parent Behaviours:
- Allows and insists that child makes decisions about contact
- Rarely talks about the other parent; uninterested in child's time
with other parent after contact; gives a cold shoulder, silent
treatment, or is moody after child's return from visit
- No photos of target parent; removes reminders of the other parent
- Refusal to hear positive comments about rejected parent; quick to
discount good times as trivial and unimportant
- No encouragement of calls to other parent between visits;
rationalizes that child does not ask
- Tells child fun things that were missed during visit with other
parent
- Indulges child with material possessions and privileges
- Sets few limits or is rigid about routines, rules and expectations
- Refuses to speak directly to parent; refuses to be in same room or
close proximity;
- Does not let target parent come to door to pick up child
- No concern for missed visits with other parent
- Makes statements and then denies what was said
- Body language and nonverbal communication reveals lack of
interest, disdain and disapproval
- Engages in inquisition of child after visits
- Rejected parent is discouraged or refused permission to attend
school events and activities
- Telephone messages, gifts and mail from other parent to child are
destroyed, ignored or passed on to the child with disdain
- Distorts any comments of child that might justify accusations
- Doesn't believe that child has any need for relationship with other
parent
- When child calls and is quiet or non-communicative, parent
wrongly assumes pressure from target parent, or that child is not
comfortable with target parent; evidence of bad parenting; does
not appreciate that child is uncomfortable talking to alienating
parent about target parent
- Portrays other parent as dangerous, may inconsistently act fearful
of other parent in front of child
- Exaggerates negative attributes of other parent, and omits
anything positive
- Delusional false statements repeated to child; distorts history and
other parent's participation in the child's life; claims other parent
has totally changed since separation
- Projection of own thoughts, feelings and behaviours onto the
other parent
- Does not correct child's rude, defiant and/or omnipotent
behaviour directed towards the other parent, but would never
permit child to do this with others
- Convinced of harm, when there is no evidence
- False or fabricated allegations of sexual, physical and/or
emotional abuse
- Denigrates and exaggerates flaws of rejected parent to child says
other parent left "us," divorced "us" and doesn't love ''us''
- Over-involves child in adult matters and litigation
- Child required to keep secrets and spy or report back on other
parent
- Child required to be messenger
- Overt and covert threats to withdraw love and affection from
child unless other parent is rejected
- Extreme lack of courtesy to rejected parent
- Relocation for minor reasons and with little concern for effects on child.

Parental Behaviours that Make Rejection or Alienation More
Likely:
- Harsh, rigid and punitive parenting style
- Outrage at child's challenge to his/her authority
- Passivity or withdrawal in face of conflict
- Immature, self-centred in relation to child
- Loses temper, angry, demanding, intimidating character traits, but
not to level of abuse
- Counter-rejecting behaviour
- Lacks empathic connection to child
- Inept and unempathic pursuit of child, pushes calls and letters,
unannounced or embarrassing visits
- Challenges child's beliefs and/or attitudes and tries to convince
them otherwise
- Dismissive of child's feelings and negative attitudes
- Induces guilt
- May use force to reassert parental position
- Vents rage, blames alienating parent for brainwashing child and takes no responsibility
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child alienation, parental alienation


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