Wanted: Prenuptial Agreement Suggestions & Advice

[#1StepMom]

Dear wise members,

I hope you can help me out... I am looking for advice and suggestions pertaining to the writing of a prenuptial agreement. I ask you because I know you have each had your share of life experiences, good and bad, and have valuable information to offer.

Here is the scenario:

Childless, never-before-married female plans to marry never-before-married father of one child. Father of child has regular access and pays child support in accordance with the guidelines.

What specific clauses should this couple include in their prenuptial agreement to ensure that their assets and income are secure and out of reach of a money-grubbing support recipient (who has dollar symbols in her eyes now that she got wind of the nuptials)?

What other clauses would you suggest they include, things that you wished you had included in your prenuptial agreement?

Any advice you can offer is greatly appreciated. Thank you all in advance!

[standing on the sidelines]

i would just make sure that you keep separate bank accounts etc. Have a joint account for bills but keep your own in your name only.

Make sure that you list any big assets that you each bring into the relationship and that it is clear that the asset belongs to the one person totally.

With the situation that you are in it is better to have a clear line drawn between his, yours and joint things.

[AtALoss]

Prenuptial Agreement Form from LawDepot.com

This site has alot of forms etc It is generic but would give you a base on what to consider and how to write it up.

Hope it helps. Basically you would list what you want to keep separate (pre-marriage/commonlaw) and then what you wnt handled what way in the event of a break up. As you will see in the form as well you can cover for events like one partner passing away. This would also consider any children & their needs if they are young for example.

[#1StepMom]

Thanks AtALoss and Standing on the Sidelines. I think using one of those forms is the best idea. They cover all the major aspects. I just wanted to know if there were any aspects specific to stepfamilies that would not be covered on the forms but that should definitely be considered. Thanks for the advice! :-)

[mtayal]

I have one question on the prenuptial agreement. Do both the parties need to declare their assets in the agreement or it is ok not to declare it if the agreement states that "Separate property" will stay as "Separate property". Or in other words if the agreement says that there is no divosion of property, money and there is no alimony then do the persons still need to declare their assets in a prenuptial agreement.

Any advice will be highly appreciated. Thanks.

[dinkyface]

What are your feelings about being financially responsible for your partner's child? Either voluntarily or not. In some circumstances, your partner's ex may be successful in requesting an increase in support payments due to your income. If you are in reality voluntarily contributing financially to the child's expenses (hard to avoid, since you will be buying groceries, buying gas, driving, sharing rent/mortgage/utilities, going to events, buying toys/presents), then this makes such a claim even more likely to succeed.

Nothing you put in a prenup can protect you against that - except perhaps to indicate that any increase in support payments will be borne solely by your partner....But then what do you do if he is temporarily out of work? In reality, you would have to cover the payments for him.

Are you considering having children?

Your question about not declaring assets is a little worrying...are either of you wanting to hide anything from the other? Or are you more interested in hiding assets from your partner's ex? If I had an asset, I think I'd want to list it, so that everyone is clear that 'that' is 'mine'.

[Gosh - #1StepMom - I wasn't thinking that the original question was YOURS - I realize you have been through a lot of this already!!]

[#1StepMom]

Originally Posted by dinkyface

Gosh - #1StepMom - I wasn't thinking that the original question was YOURS - I realize you have been through a lot of this already!!

Yeah, it's been a hoot! A heck of a ride! LOL! And they won't let us off this darn roller coaster!

Originally Posted by dinkyface

What are your feelings about being financially responsible for your partner's child? Either voluntarily or not. In some circumstances, your partner's ex may be successful in requesting an increase in support payments due to your income. If you are in reality voluntarily contributing financially to the child's expenses (hard to avoid, since you will be buying groceries, buying gas, driving, sharing rent/mortgage/utilities, going to events, buying toys/presents), then this makes such a claim even more likely to succeed.

Oh so true. It's reality. My husband and I have been together since before his son was born. I've been a bonus mom since the child's birth, and have contributed financially to the child's expenses when he's with us - it's unavoidable!

Originally Posted by dinkyface

Nothing you put in a prenup can protect you against that - except perhaps to indicate that any increase in support payments will be borne solely by your partner....But then what do you do if he is temporarily out of work? In reality, you would have to cover the payments for him.

We recently learned that our prenup was "void" when it comes to Family Law. Go figure! Even though we have a clause in our prenup that specifically states that I would in no way, shape, or form be financially responsible for the child and that my income would never be taken into account when determining child support or my husband's ability to pay. Turns out family law judges don't give a rat's ass about prenups! But, I'm grateful to have a prenup with that clause in it... and if need be, I will use it for all it's worth - and demand that it be worth a lot! ;-)

Originally Posted by dinkyface

Are you considering having children?

Yes... in the near future too! We're both very excited. Given our "family law circumstance" (my husband having a one night stand 2 months before we met, only to find out during our dating period that he had fathered a child during that one night stand) we are not willing to refrain from having a normal and happy life, and having our very own family together, solely because of one condom-breaking incident my husband had before we met. We are determined to have a happy life, as normal a life as possible, including his son in our family as well.

[#1StepMom]

Originally Posted by dinkyface

Your question about not declaring assets is a little worrying...are either of you wanting to hide anything from the other? Or are you more interested in hiding assets from your partner's ex? If I had an asset, I think I'd want to list it, so that everyone is clear that 'that' is 'mine'.

I agree. Usually you attach a list of your assets to the back of your prenup. You don't particularly need to list your assets in the actual paragraphs. If you want to ensure that your assets stay YOURS, I'd definitely list them!

[FreeNow]

I agree with #1StepMom.
Although a listing of assets would not be required for a pre-nup, it would be a good idea......but not romantic......fook romantic. Cover ass.

FN