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-   -   Is tutoring an extra curricular activity? (http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f3/tutoring-extra-curricular-activity-21077/)

freckles1234 05-31-2017 02:26 PM

Is tutoring an extra curricular activity?
 
Is tutoring considered an extra curricular activity?

freckles1234 05-31-2017 02:49 PM

Sorry let me clarify, I am not asking in regards to paying the costs for it. I am asking because our court order states:

The children shall be permitted to be involved in at least 1 activity at any given time beyond any educational extra curricular activity regardless of whose time the activity falls on. If there is an option on days of participation, the parties will decide together which day is best. The parties will work together to ensure the children attend all events and practices associated with such an activity.

I have the kids every other week in the summer instead of every Thursday-Sunday and she is wanting me to do 3 days a week of tutoring. I do not want to do this as I do not think the tutor is doing a good job or qualified to help my kids with their learning disabilities.

Stillbreathing 05-31-2017 03:13 PM

I have one of my children enrolled in tutoring by Sylvan learning and it's really making a difference. It's about 400/month. My lawyer says it qualifies as a s7 expense and therefor my STBX will have to pay towards it as well.

freckles1234 05-31-2017 03:16 PM

This is a private tutor that comes to her house and to be honest in 2 years, I haven't seen a difference. I would be happy to pay towards a proper tutor but my ex is fixed on this one.

trinton 06-01-2017 07:45 PM

is that the only clause in your order about section 7 items?

freckles1234 06-02-2017 08:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinton (Post 221202)
is that the only clause in your order about section 7 items?

It has the typical the parties will discuss and agree on any section 7 expenses. If the parties do not agree, the party registering the child will be responsible for the cost.

That is it.

trinton 06-02-2017 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221205)
It has the typical the parties will discuss and agree on any section 7 expenses. If the parties do not agree, the party registering the child will be responsible for the cost.

That is it.

Did she discuss and did you agree?


Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221177)
The children shall be permitted to be involved in at least 1 activity at any given time beyond any educational extra curricular activity regardless of whose time the activity falls on. If there is an option on days of participation, the parties will decide together which day is best. The parties will work together to ensure the children attend all events and practices associated with such an activity.

If you didn't agree, then I'm not sure if tutoring falls under the category of "at least one activity beyond any educational extra curricular activity". To me it seems that you must agree on educational extra curricular activity and anything beyond that you have no say in and must take child to events, i.e., hockey, swimming etc.

freckles1234 06-02-2017 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinton (Post 221206)
Did she discuss and did you agree?




If you didn't agree, then I'm not sure if tutoring falls under the category of "at least one activity beyond any educational extra curricular activity". To me it seems that you must agree on educational extra curricular activity and anything beyond that you have no say in and must take child to events, i.e., hockey, swimming etc.

She is WELL aware that I will not be paying for it. That isn't even a question. I did not agree and she has tried 3 times to get me to pay and I have refused again letting her know that I may consider it should she switch to a tutor able to help mykids.

I am 99% sure it is an educational extra curricular and therefore does not fall within our agreement. I actually put in the extra curricular clause because I have my kids in activities and my daughter wanted to do competitive cheer but practices are during her time. I do pay for all the extra curricular activities because she wanted the kids to do what she wants and no what they want. Ah well, I'd rather pay for them and my kids enjoy what they do then them having to do something they don't like. They are only young for so long, right?

trinton 06-02-2017 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221208)
I may consider it should she switch to a tutor able to help mykids.

You've essentially agreed that tutoring is necessary. Of course, this does not imply that you've agreed the tutor she has chosen is necessary nor does it imply that you must pay - she did not discuss and you did not agree.

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221208)
I am 99% sure it is an educational extra curricular and therefore does not fall within our agreement.

Tutoring is for educational purposes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221208)
I actually put in the extra curricular clause because I have my kids in activities and my daughter wanted to do competitive cheer but practices are during her time. I do pay for all the extra curricular activities because she wanted the kids to do what she wants and no what they want.

Then clearly that clause was regarding that specific activity - not tutoring.

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221208)
Ah well, I'd rather pay for them and my kids enjoy what they do then them having to do something they don't like.

Absolutely. And refuse to pay for things that they don't enjoy, is not necessary for them, or is not benefiting them.


Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles1234 (Post 221208)
They are only young for so long, right?

Yes. And how they adjust in the early years is likely going to effect them in their teen and adult years.

freckles1234 06-02-2017 10:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinton (Post 221209)
You've essentially agreed that tutoring is necessary. Of course, this does not imply that you've agreed the tutor she has chosen is necessary nor does it imply that you must pay - she did not discuss and you did not agree.



Tutoring is for educational purposes.



Then clearly that clause was regarding that specific activity - not tutoring.



Absolutely. And refuse to pay for things that they don't enjoy, is not necessary for them, or is not benefiting them.




Yes. And how they adjust in the early years is likely going to effect them in their teen and adult years.

I still cant figure out how to break this in to different quotes..

Yes tutoring is necessary. My 13 year old has dyslexia, my 12 year old is reading at a grade 2 level and my 9 year old can't spell simple words. My ex is also unable to put together a proper sentence. I help them when they are with me and work on it but I can only do so much. I would be more than happy to contribute to a tutor but not this one. She is unqualified for their issues, she does all their work for them and in 2 years there has been no improvements. I told the exact same thing to the judge and he told her if she wants me to pay for it then we have to agree on the tutor otherwise she can continue with this one and pay for her herself.

I will not agree nor pay for activities they do not like. My ex has gotten over that one now and just lets me register/pay for them. Like I said, I am ok with that. My daughter cheers and is in love with it, my son plays hockey and the other one plays soccer. (I also have my wife's daughter that figure skates competitively and her bio dad doesn't pay his support) Are they cheap? Nope but I work my tail off so they can do it and I don't bother asking for my ex to help. She has been on welfare for 12 years now and I don't expect that to change anytime soon.

My only concern is I don't want to be unable to do anything all summer because she wants her tutor to come to my house 3 days a week. Again, I would agree no problem if the tutor actually helped them but she does not.


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