Somebody please tell me the law! :s

[muscle_woman]

My bf shared a house with his ex...he bought the house so his son could live with him (this child does not belong to her) and she lived with him for about four years (but the house in question was only lived in for about a year and a half). He bought the house, his name is solely on the deed and mortgage. They both filed as single on their taxes. She borrowed about 11k a year and a half ago and spent $7500 on new kitchen cabinets. The house is worth less than the mortgage as the market has decreased (in Alberta) by about 20 thousand. He left and continued to pay half the mortgage. He has since asked her to leave and she agreed to a buyout for compensation for her renos. She accepted $5500, but since is refusing to leave the property, now stating she wants $9000 and will not exit the premises until she gets it. She also says she put a lien on the mortgage. Is this possible? Can he give her notice to get out and does he have to give her anything at all? What exactly do we have to do do get her out?? Please help!

[standing on the sidelines]

why in the hell would he leave when his name is on the deed and mortgage??? He had every right at that time to kick her out. Okay she accept 5500 but was there an exchange of cash?? she should get something for the kichen cabinets that she put in. I would offer her the amount that she paid for the cabinets and get her to sign a paper stating that she will not ask for anything more in the future.

[billm]

Did she pay rent? Did she contribute financially? If she did then he should reimburse her for the cabinets. If she lived off of him then the $5500 was fair.

Either way it seems she agreed to and accepted the $5500 as a settlement, so I don't see she has a leg to stand on.

What is she saying about the sudden request for $9000 ($3500 more to equal $9000, or does she want $9000 on top of the $5500?).

If she just wants $3500, I would give her that and (from what you have posted), he can have earned the right to call her a greedy ***** for the rest of his life. Of course, she has to move out first, but perhaps a post dated cheque. I am not sure if I would get her sign anything as that may cause her to go for more, I would just get her out. On the cheque write something like 'final settlement' or something. Be careful when she moves out that she does not take things that are not hers...

If she wants to get more 'compensation' than just the cabinets, then tell her she can have half the decrease of the house asset! (she owes him $$$!)

I can't image that she is living in his house - what a selfish *****. Of course I wonder what her side of the story is

[muscle_woman]

First off, he left because the relationship was over and he was hoping to sell the house, but because of the market being so bad, that isn't going to happen at this time. Yes, she was sharing the expenses, him paying about 60%. She said that she miscalculated the receipts but when he added them up, the amount was not 9k, but rather $7500. My guess is that she wants us to pay off her personal loan. He has been paying half the mortgage the whole time he has been gone. She was not given any money for the cabinets to date and there was no written agreement, it was verbal at the time she agreed. I don't believe she has any lien on the house, with his name solely on the deed and mortgage. I do agree she should be reimbursed for her contribution to the renos HOWEVER, because he will lose in excess of 20k if he were to sell it, I think it only fair she get the same deal. In short, the reno's did not increase the value of the home because of the market at this time. My question is...what can we do legally to get her out NOW?? She was supposed to be out by July 31. My children and I are moving across the country to be a family and she is in our home! Thanks everyone!

[billm]

If she spent $7500 on the cabinets only a year ago and otherwise contributed to the house and is still paying a form of rent, then I would offer $7500 to get her out.

The current value of the house has no bearing on this. It is his house, not hers. If it went up in value while they were common law then she would want a piece of it, so one could argue that she should assume half the decrease in value while she lived in it I suppose, but I would rather live in a world where it is simply his house. So pay for the cabinets and move on.

[standing on the sidelines]

Originally Posted by billm

If she spent $7500 on the cabinets only a year ago and otherwise contributed to the house and is still paying a form of rent, then I would offer $7500 to get her out.

The current value of the house has no bearing on this. It is his house, not hers. If it went up in value while they were common law then she would want a piece of it, so one could argue that she should assume half the decrease in value while she lived in it I suppose, but I would rather live in a world where it is simply his house. So pay for the cabinets and move on.

very good advice. Sometimes it is better to just bite the bullet and put a period behind things.

[muscle_woman]

ok, so we offered her the $7500...she says she needs to run it by her lawyer and will get back to us? Oh man...sooo frustrating and discouraging!

[billm]

Originally Posted by muscle_woman

ok, so we offered her the $7500...she says she needs to run it by her lawyer and will get back to us? Oh man...sooo frustrating and discouraging!

Mostly unrelated venting ahead.....

That is what really bugs me about some people (including my ex) - how hard is it to know if something is fair or not, especially after having considered it for a while? What the hell does the lawyer have to do with it? Every time my ex goes to her lawyer, to run something by her that my ex herself says is fair, that we finally worked out, my ex comes back with a load of crap that does not make any sense, crap that we decided was crap a year ago! But always has the same theme, that I pay more, despite what was decided by us was totally fair and based on considering all factors and using simple math.

I can't figure out if it is a lack of ability to understand (how hard is addition and dividing by 2 anyway?), or simply anger, jealousy, and resentment. Anyways - judging from personal experience, lawyers are a huge problem because their goal is not to find a fair solution for thier client, but to simply create billable hours, and to get as much money for their client as possible - this is the professional that my ex is paying hundreds of dollars an hour to represent her - hired by someone that once pleged to love and honour me forever and created a family with me. I reluctantly hired a lawyer after my ex continued with hers and refused many requests for mediation. I keep him under control, have only used him a few hours for advice, and I do not let him contact my ex or her lawyer - I represent myself thanks. I have seen the letters my ex's lawyers (she is on her second lawyer) sent to me, and I would not wish that on the mother of my children. The letters don't make sense, and are impersonal and attacking. What a hateful way to end a relationship. Couples who need lawyers to solve things have at least one person that is unreasonable.

[enoughalready]

Billm

Very well said. If you take the lawyers out of the picture and stick to just the facts the system would work. The Judges rulings should be tracked for fairness also. Too many off the wall judgements by the Judges. They don't stick to the law just whatever comes to their head that day. I'm sick of and many others are sick of rolling the dice in court. It should be more staight forward. The system only works at providing as you said billable hours for lawyers.

Childsupport should be granted as per the tables and thats it.

Extra ordinary should be discussed and agreed upon. If no agreement then it shouldn't be granted. Where is the payors right to choice? The payor shouldn't be forced to pay for something the recipient decides to sign the kids up for. The kids can ask and the payor (parent)will decide if he/she has the funds to pay for it. They seem to have taken the payors rights away as a parent. You have the right to pay for everything but no right to decide on what your paying for. Crazy system.