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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #51 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 02:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
I completely agree. There's no way I'm agreeing to go a month without seeing my kids. They'd never want that either. I don't think there's anything wrong with doing one week or two week stretches. Or camp if one parent decides to put them in on their time.


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Berner..Ange .. I'm confused. Got back from camping last night and very tired perhaps.

The dad isn't asking for a month consecutively. I think you all forgot that Angie said 7 day stretches here and there..not consecutively.


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Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
He wants three 7 day stretches somewhere in there but also wants to keep the other days in the regular schedule.
So what's the issue again? Is it that you dont want him to have equal access in the summer either? Or that you want the kids to be there only when he's at work? I'm not getting the big deal here.

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Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
I'm sure you wouldn't agree to your daughter going to camp for a month and then going to moms for two weeks for her time with the child?
I dont understand. Ange's ex isn't asking for a month...7+7+7 = 21 first of all. Secondly, her ex isn't asking for consecutive weeks at all. So Angie would never go a month without seeing them. Her ex requested (not demanded) some 7 day stretches here and there.. It's called summer vacation. As for my daughter, as Arabian pointed out, a lot of this has to do with maturity and age and I believe Ange's kids are much older the my daughter so the situations are quite different.

Thank god my ex isn't doing what these 2 are. Week on/week off..cut and dry...no funny business. If Ange just said yes to 50/50 to begin with none of this would be taking place. (My ex and I may still be fighting over hours, days/times also had we not settled 50/50). Weekends, holidays, etc always even themselves out over time. The catastrophizing here is mind boggling.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 08-21-2017 at 03:02 PM.
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  #52 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 03:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Berner..Ange .. I'm confused. Got back from camping last night and very tired perhaps.

The dad isn't asking for a month consecutively. I think you all forgot that Angie said 7 day stretches here and there..not consecutively.


As seen here:

So what's the issue again? Is it that you dont want him to have equal access in the summer either? Or that you want the kids to be there only when he's at work? I'm not getting the big deal here.


I dont understand. Ange's ex isn't asking for a month...7+7+7 = 21 first of all. Secondly, her ex isn't asking for consecutive weeks at all. So Angie would never go a month without seeing them. Her ex requested (not demanded) some 7 day stretches here and there.. It's called summer vacation. As for my daughter, as Arabian pointed out, a lot of this has to do with maturity and age and I believe Ange's kids are much older the my daughter so the situations are quite different.

Thank god my ex isn't doing what these 2 are. Week on/week off..cut and dry...no funny business. If Ange just said yes to 50/50 to begin with none of this would be taking place. (My ex and I may still be fighting over hours, days/times also had we not settled 50/50). Weekends, holidays, etc always even themselves out over time. The catastrophizing here is mind boggling.


LF, we're just having conversation here. Nobody said my ex was asking for a month consecutive. We are discussing how different schedules can work. It's hypothetical. Berner gave her opinion. Arabian gave hers. We're just talking in general terms. Perhaps the confusion is that you are butting in and don't realize this. You still seem to have difficulty grasping that my ex also did not ask for 50/50. He threw that around in the start and then retracted. He was offered a 50/50 summer and refused it so how can you possibly make the argument that I am denying anything? It's a bit broken record-ish now....

Some relationships require a very cut and dry agreement. It limits the fighting and "misinterpreting". I'm sure there are people on here who would agree with that. Yes it will be very prescribed and spelled out when it's all said and done but this will be for the betterment of everyone involved.

You should probably take a nap to clear your mind from the confusion you're experiencing.


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  #53 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 05:23 PM
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I figured ppl thought you meant "consecutive weeks"..especially when posters like Berner said she couldn't go a month without seeing the kids. Just making sure ppl are aware that your ex is "not" asking you to not see your kids for a month straight. I think he's trying to ask to split up the summer evenly and unfortunately the weekends sound like an issue. Personally, in my own situation, I'm still getting used to it all too. But I now realize that everything evens out in the end. Some years I'll get more special occasions, etc..some years my ex will. It's part of the process.

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  #54 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 05:51 PM
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^^ You weren't so blasÚ when you didn't have Easter LF. Or when you missed the once in a lifetime family reunion.

And as far as blasting Ange for contradicting her early posts (which I don't agree that she did), your earlier posts said you were audio taped yelling/swearing at your ex while your daughter could be heard crying in the background (so obviously she could hear you too if she could be heard on tape.) You retracted that.

Stop with the hypocrisy.

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  #55 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 05:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
You still seem to have difficulty grasping that my ex also did not ask for 50/50.
Yes he did in the beginning. You just didnt believe he wanted it and said no. But he did indeed ask. I can go quote your old posts but I think readers already know he did, regardless of intentions. I'm not saying I know for a fact whether or not he was bluffing. All Im saying is he asked and you said no .. because that did happen.

Quote:
He was offered a 50/50 summer and refused it so how can you possibly make the argument that I am denying anything?
I didn't argue that you were denying an equal summer. I asked if you were. Big difference.

Not here to make trouble Ange .. like I said .. looks like you're doing well and I wish you the best.
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  #56 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 09:03 PM
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LF maybe you should read instead of jumping to conclusions? Arabian stated about one parent having July and one having August... not Ange... not once did I say Ange's ex was asking for this. I was responding to Arabians comment on the fact that is would never fly and I am sure if your ex asked for ALL of July or August you would say no way because I don't assume you would want to go another month without seeing your daughter.

Chill out and stop pretending you know what everyone is talking about


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  #57 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 09:44 PM
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[QUOTE=Ange71727;222936]This would be wonderful, however it is not very realistic. I am on the trial list for January and nothing has technically been settled. I don't think it would be wise of me to just drop all communication.


No law says you have to communicate with your ex directly. Communicate through lawyer only on important issue.
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  #58 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 09:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
LF maybe you should read instead of jumping to conclusions? Arabian stated about one parent having July and one having August... not Ange... not once did I say Ange's ex was asking for this. I was responding to Arabians comment on the fact that is would never fly and I am sure if your ex asked for ALL of July or August you would say no way because I don't assume you would want to go another month without seeing your daughter.

Chill out and stop pretending you know what everyone is talking about


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Lol Im extremely chill. You keep encouraging conflict and discouraging access flexibility. Great for the kids.
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  #59 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 09:57 PM
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No law says you have to communicate with your ex directly. Communicate through lawyer only on important issue.
Not worth it. She's not taking any advice on these forums regarding communication.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 08-21-2017 at 09:59 PM.
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  #60 (permalink)  
Old 08-21-2017, 11:10 PM
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Yes it was me, and me alone, who brought up suggestion of one month at one parent and one month at other parent's home. I didn't get much agreement LOL which is quite all right.

I think people pander their children too much. I also think people are kind of strange and use this sort of situation as a way to stay connected with their ex. (Yep you guys won't agree with me on that one either but it's just my observation... outside looking in).

I also think people tell their ex way too much about their daily lives. Having kids have to phone parents every day is just another way for an ex to be nosy. Same with too much back and forth between parents homes. I suspect that control freaks like that sort of thing as it keeps them in the loop with regard to their ex's comings and goings.
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