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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 08-18-2017, 11:47 AM
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Not trying to change ppl's minds. The OP's story has taken many twists and turns and I just want it to be clear that NONE of us know the real story. I have a gut feeling that there's MUCH MUCH more to it. I recall Ange being very scared of the fathers case. Scared that he would get more time with his kids, etc. She's recorded them and started threads monthly looking for ways to block an equal relationship. Big red flags. Now she has the audacity to make fun of him for not taking 50/50 and working at the same time. Hello!?! You said "No' to that request. lol

But my main point is "nobody here knows the truth" about his motives, etc. So I dont get why its so black and white (LF32 wrong and we right). I may not be correct .. but I think you should adopt that mindset about your stances as well. You may not be correct.
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 08-18-2017, 11:58 AM
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I agree with her position because he started the application to reduce child support and then never brought his time up to what he blustered about. EVEN WITH his set schedule in his favour.

All of the other stuff was just noise. The fact is he wanted to stop paying child support and proposed a schedule he claimed made it 50/50 when it was not. I also side with her because she reduced cs even in the face of this bs.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 08-18-2017, 02:37 PM
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I am not actually convinced we are settling yet even though it's close. Even with the reduction of almost $500 per month for him, he thinks he's getting a raw deal in the child support department. He is demanding that the three weeks he wants in the summer are on certain days strictly tailored to his work schedule. His answer "well you married a shift worker so this is what you have to deal with". I am going to stand firm on the summer holidays and see what happens. I want to accommodate the request but not only on his terms. I also think I need to be firm about requiring OFW.


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  #34 (permalink)  
Old 08-19-2017, 12:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
I am not actually convinced we are settling yet even though it's close. Even with the reduction of almost $500 per month for him, he thinks he's getting a raw deal in the child support department. He is demanding that the three weeks he wants in the summer are on certain days strictly tailored to his work schedule. His answer "well you married a shift worker so this is what you have to deal with". I am going to stand firm on the summer holidays and see what happens. I want to accommodate the request but not only on his terms. I also think I need to be firm about requiring OFW.


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I know what it feels like to think its never going to end. Keep your head up Ange. The end is near. Youre doing okay. Also .. he kind of has a point about seeing his kids when hes not at work in the summer. My g/f's ex does the same in the summer (requests time when hes not at work .. vacation). My g/f sees no issue with this and neither do I. In fact it's fairly logical. Just my opinion though.
Get that OFW in place. Good luck. :-)

Last edited by LovingFather32; 08-19-2017 at 12:06 AM.
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Old 08-19-2017, 08:58 AM
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when you say that he wants three weeks tailored to the days that he is off. Do you mean that he wants three weeks with a week here and there or certain days that in the end add up to the three weeks?
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Old 08-19-2017, 09:48 AM
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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
when you say that he wants three weeks tailored to the days that he is off. Do you mean that he wants three weeks with a week here and there or certain days that in the end add up to the three weeks?


He wants three 7 day stretches somewhere in there but also wants to keep the other days in the regular schedule. It's complicated but if he had it his way I would get two weekends out of the whole 8/9 week summer. I am of the mindset that we could do week on week off or another predictable schedule and he can just request his holiday time around that. The whole regular school year schedule is set to accommodate his days off. He wants to be able to take minimal holiday time by using his existing days off and extending to get a week. Trouble is, I would end up with only 2 weekends out of the entire summer and even though I'm off all summer there are people in my life who are only off on weekends. It's super difficult and meanwhile he thinks I'm stalling because I can't come up with something I'd be comfortable with.


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Old 08-19-2017, 09:59 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
He wants three 7 day stretches somewhere in there but also wants to keep the other days in the regular schedule. It's complicated but if he had it his way I would get two weekends out of the whole 8/9 week summer. I am of the mindset that we could do week on week off or another predictable schedule and he can just request his holiday time around that. The whole regular school year schedule is set to accommodate his days off. He wants to be able to take minimal holiday time by using his existing days off and extending to get a week. Trouble is, I would end up with only 2 weekends out of the entire summer and even though I'm off all summer there are people in my life who are only off on weekends. It's super difficult and meanwhile he thinks I'm stalling because I can't come up with something I'd be comfortable with.


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I thought there was more to the story. That it wasnt as cut and dried as LF32 seems to think.

He has holiday time then he can take it in the summer and see his kids so that is what he should do. It isnt fair that he gets most of the weekends so stand your ground on that. Your plan of a week on and week off for the summer seems reasonable.
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  #38 (permalink)  
Old 08-19-2017, 12:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
I thought there was more to the story. That it wasnt as cut and dried as LF32 seems to think.



He has holiday time then he can take it in the summer and see his kids so that is what he should do. It isnt fair that he gets most of the weekends so stand your ground on that. Your plan of a week on and week off for the summer seems reasonable.


I agree with this... this is usually what ends up happening in my husbands case with the kids. Their agreement does state that in odd numbered years he gets to pick his holidays first and even numbered years she picks first. This works well as if there is a family event going on that happens to not be on one of their regular weekends we are able to plan around that with picking weeks. Usually it works out that on the Fridays armload our regular weekends we pick the kids up and have them for a week and then Mom has them for a week.


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  #39 (permalink)  
Old 08-19-2017, 03:23 PM
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sounds complicated

Sheesh - what happened to parents simply splitting the summer - one takes the kids in July and the other in August? If one parent has to work then they could put kids in camp for 2 of the 4 weeks that they have with the kids. This way parents have option of a full month of uninterrupted time with their kids if they want it. Backup plans could include a visit with grandparents perhaps?

If someone has worked for same employer for many years then they would have at least 3 weeks vacation time would they not?
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Old 08-19-2017, 05:14 PM
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I thought that usually the summer vacation weeks superceded the regular schedule., so If either parent requested 1 or 2 weeks, consecutive or not then whoever was supposed to have kids during that time based on the regular schedule, gave up that time, so everyone could have certain weeks uninterupted. How can you ever plan a trip otherwise?
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