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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 10-07-2012, 11:18 AM
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Default Should I respond to affidavit?

My husband recently filed for custody of his daughter after 6 yrs of his ex playing games with his access to his daughter. He received her response of which she offers even less time than he already has with a request for a restraining order against me. I have had minimal contact with her because I know she doesn't like me. Along with her response is a 49 paragraph affidavit of which 75% is bashing me, accusing me of abuse, making untrue statements about my ex and my relationship with him as well as my daughters, etc.

I was thinking of filing an affidavit in response to hers quite simply stating that I am shocked by the allegations, that I have and always will respect that she is my step-daughters mother, expressing my love for my step-daughter and making the point that this court case is in fact about my step-daughter, not me and my hope that both sides can come to a resolution that best serves my step-daughter.

I know judges aren't stupid and hope that the one assigned to this case can see the affidavit for what it is but I wonder if since she has brought me into the forefront of the case that I should respond.

Any advice would be extremely helpful.
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Old 10-07-2012, 11:24 AM
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If an affidavit isn't challenged then it will be accepted as true.
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Old 10-07-2012, 11:26 AM
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Do I need to provide an explaination or rebutal to every accusation or is it sufficient to say that I am shocked by them?
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Old 10-07-2012, 11:41 AM
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Do you think you will be better off being vague and general, or specific? Sorry, being specific is always going to be better.

I'm not saying that the judge will believe it, but why take chances? Write in a professional, logical manner, avoid counter accusations.

If some the instances can be refuted factually, like for example if you can show you were out of town that day, this will damage her credibility. Again, these kind of affidavits don't carry a lot of weight, and it is a PITA, but you are better off doing a good job with everything you submit, being clear, factual, and organized. This is what gives weight and credibility to your side.
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:09 PM
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So her affidavit was a response to my husbands affidavit. should he respond to any allegations from her in a second affidavit? This could go on forever.
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scarycheri View Post
So her affidavit was a response to my husbands affidavit. should he respond to any allegations from her in a second affidavit? This could go on forever.
No it's not.

Quote:
RULE 14

RESTRICTIONS ON EVIDENCE

(20) The following restrictions apply to evidence for use on a motion, unless the court orders otherwise:
1. The party making the motion shall serve all the evidence in support of the motion with the notice of motion.
2. The party responding to the motion shall then serve all the evidence in response.
3. The party making the motion may then serve evidence replying to any new matters raised by the evidence served by the party responding to the motion.
4. No other evidence may be used. O. Reg. 114/99, r. 14 (20).
But keep in mind you did not say under what rule your husband filed.
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:10 PM
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Read up on the definition of CRITICAL THINKING before you form any response. While this all feels very personal, do your best not to take it personally. Take the high road on this without fail - whether it's in your husband's words or your own.

Keep it as much "to the point" as possible. Judges do not want to go through pages and pages of blather. Point form, factual. No emotion.
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Old 10-07-2012, 03:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hadenough View Post
No emotion.

This is exactly why a lawyer is a good choice for most of us. It's very hard to think critically when one is in the midst of all the emotional trauma involved in divorce/custody proceedings.
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Old 10-07-2012, 04:02 PM
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Once upon a time, I responded emotionally to much of the bs being flung my way. I see now, (yes it took a while) that this was a knee-jerk reaction on my part and also perfectly natural.. But... I finally concluded that emotional reactions are a complete waste of time and energy (money too).

Something to say? Prove it. "Lies have speed. The truth has endurance" (I don't remember who first said that.) To my way of thinking: say something and back it up, or STFU. A bit harsh? Maybe. But I've got my emotional responses well 'in check' now.
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Old 10-07-2012, 05:38 PM
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Every time I get legal documents I read them after the kids are gone to bed .Then I read and pace at the same time,sounding like a Tourettes sufferer.
Then I make points of the main falsehoods.Just jot them down in bulleted form.Then point by point I get factual evidence to disprove the lie.Nice and neat.No emotion.No opinion .Just cold hard truth and nothing but.I even have been known to pre-empt certain bullshitcullar paths he seems to be steering for and gather evidence and present it.Wont deny all the lies at once but when you lay waste to the biggies and prove them false it will wreck havoc with credibility.
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