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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 03-19-2014, 03:54 PM
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Default shady financial form and going to court...help

I am looking for some advise and maybe a bit of clarity and direction...I am a self rep headed to trial in less than a month and I'm still shocked. In our CC my ex agreed to arrears, support going forward and to Special expenses. We cannot agree on the time frame for repayment. That is what is sending us to court!
His income is over 150K and has the money to repay in a timely manner,
but refuses. I sent his lawyer an offer to settle asking for a lump sum and the rest over 5 years, which I felt very fair. I have heard no response.
I want to shine a light on his Financial Form 13. He has a mysterious loan, low RRSP contributions, a high mortgage, (100K more than when we separated), didn't disclose property that he owned at the time he filed his response and did not add a vehicle that he owns to his assets. Under the Real Estate section he put N/A yet he claims a mortgage as an expense. (he's living in the matrimonial home)
His net worth (on paper) is negative 260k.
My Questions are regarding what points to bring to the judges attention? If I want clarification on a few of the things on his form 13, can I just ask those questions of my ex during the trial or do I have to ask my ex's lawyer for an explanation before the trial?
How dirty does this get?
I have first hand knowledge of an expensive and rather risque website that he has been a member of for at least 6 months. (has since cancelled his membership).
I know it sounds petty but were talking 249 per month! To me that is a luxury when you owe support that you claim you cant afford to pay!
I have facebook pages printed of three resort vacations hes taken over the past two years plus
I am sure he is paying his lawyer close to if not more than he owes in support.
How do I prove my case with the judge?
What points do I need to shed light on? and any advise on what I should NOT do?
Im reading through the Family Law Rules but they can be a bit confusing....would love to hear from someone who has gone through this far...Oh one last thing my ex refused to go to his MIP, at assignment court his lawyer was told that he had 14 days to go and file the MIP....14 days have gone and he still didnt go....what now?
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 03-19-2014, 04:21 PM
FB_ FB_ is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sinkingfast View Post
I am looking for some advise and maybe a bit of clarity and direction...I am a self rep headed to trial in less than a month and I'm still shocked. In our CC my ex agreed to arrears, support going forward and to Special expenses. We cannot agree on the time frame for repayment. That is what is sending us to court!
His income is over 150K and has the money to repay in a timely manner,
but refuses. I sent his lawyer an offer to settle asking for a lump sum and the rest over 5 years, which I felt very fair. I have heard no response.
I want to shine a light on his Financial Form 13. He has a mysterious loan, low RRSP contributions, a high mortgage, (100K more than when we separated), didn't disclose property that he owned at the time he filed his response and did not add a vehicle that he owns to his assets. Under the Real Estate section he put N/A yet he claims a mortgage as an expense. (he's living in the matrimonial home)
His net worth (on paper) is negative 260k.
My Questions are regarding what points to bring to the judges attention? If I want clarification on a few of the things on his form 13, can I just ask those questions of my ex during the trial or do I have to ask my ex's lawyer for an explanation before the trial?
How dirty does this get?
I have first hand knowledge of an expensive and rather risque website that he has been a member of for at least 6 months. (has since cancelled his membership).
I know it sounds petty but were talking 249 per month! To me that is a luxury when you owe support that you claim you cant afford to pay!
I have facebook pages printed of three resort vacations hes taken over the past two years plus
I am sure he is paying his lawyer close to if not more than he owes in support.
How do I prove my case with the judge?
What points do I need to shed light on? and any advise on what I should NOT do?
Im reading through the Family Law Rules but they can be a bit confusing....would love to hear from someone who has gone through this far...Oh one last thing my ex refused to go to his MIP, at assignment court his lawyer was told that he had 14 days to go and file the MIP....14 days have gone and he still didnt go....what now?
You need a lawyer and you need one fast.

If you are writing your court papers like you have written this post I believe you are in for a world of hurt.

It doesn't sound like you understand the concept of relevance, he either has the money or he doesn't. What documents has he provided as evidence and what documents has he not. The judge is not going to believe a word you say without proof. The judge is also going to order him to do something unless you ask for it.
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Old 03-19-2014, 04:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sinkingfast View Post
I am looking for some advise and maybe a bit of clarity and direction...I am a self rep headed to trial in less than a month and I'm still shocked. In our CC my ex agreed to arrears, support going forward and to Special expenses. We cannot agree on the time frame for repayment. That is what is sending us to court!
His income is over 150K and has the money to repay in a timely manner,
but refuses. I sent his lawyer an offer to settle asking for a lump sum and the rest over 5 years, which I felt very fair. I have heard no response.
I want to shine a light on his Financial Form 13. He has a mysterious loan, low RRSP contributions, a high mortgage, (100K more than when we separated), didn't disclose property that he owned at the time he filed his response and did not add a vehicle that he owns to his assets. Under the Real Estate section he put N/A yet he claims a mortgage as an expense. (he's living in the matrimonial home)
His net worth (on paper) is negative 260k.
My Questions are regarding what points to bring to the judges attention? If I want clarification on a few of the things on his form 13, can I just ask those questions of my ex during the trial or do I have to ask my ex's lawyer for an explanation before the trial?
How dirty does this get?
I have first hand knowledge of an expensive and rather risque website that he has been a member of for at least 6 months. (has since cancelled his membership).
I know it sounds petty but were talking 249 per month! To me that is a luxury when you owe support that you claim you cant afford to pay!
I have facebook pages printed of three resort vacations hes taken over the past two years plus
I am sure he is paying his lawyer close to if not more than he owes in support.
How do I prove my case with the judge?
What points do I need to shed light on? and any advise on what I should NOT do?
Im reading through the Family Law Rules but they can be a bit confusing....would love to hear from someone who has gone through this far...Oh one last thing my ex refused to go to his MIP, at assignment court his lawyer was told that he had 14 days to go and file the MIP....14 days have gone and he still didnt go....what now?
What you cannot do, as FB mentions, is bring up the stuff that isn't hard evidence.

Going to a resort isn't evidence (you would have to show he paid for it, and even then). Being a member of a website isn't evidence.

Evidence is showing that an agreement was made and was broken. Evidence is showing an offer to settle was rejected.
Evidence is showing his income.
Evidence is proving he has hidden assets.

Bringing up the other stuff will make you look unprofessional and not credible in court. Don't bring up issues you can't prove or that aren't relevent.
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:06 PM
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If I could afford one I would...believe me I would.
Perhaps I am in a "world of hurt", and that is why I am here.
He has provided nothing except his Answer, Financial Form 13 and NOA's.
What type of proof am I looking for? He is saying he can only afford pennies a month on his arrears. What relevant info am I looking for? Is his info on form 13 not relevant?
Proof? Such as land title with his name on it? Facebook pages? If his argument is he cannot afford to repay his arrears but has disposable income to spend on luxuries....is that not relevant?
And no...my court papers are not written like they are on an online forum.
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:16 PM
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Thank you Downtrodden Dad. The last thing I want to do is appear unprofessional. I am doing the best I can trying to sort out what is important to the court and what is not.
If his financial form is trumped up to make his net worth extremely low, how do I question that?...or do I even bother?
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:29 PM
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What I'm wondering is...if arrears has been agreed to...why not just submit that to FRO and let them work out a payment schedule? It would certainly be easier than the court process. You may not get the payments you're asking for, but you'll pass the responsibility of dealing with the ex onto FRO.
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:34 PM
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Vacations- How can you prove he paid for them?

Website- How can you prove he was a member and paid membership fees?

Real Estate - How do you know he still holds the title on the house and not just the mortgage?

Loan - what proof do you have that it is "mysterious" and why does it matter?

RRSP - Why does it matter that his RRSP contributions are low?

High Mortgage- so we remortgaged after the divorce? So what? What does that mean to you?

Real Estate/Vehicle - Are their values so significant that his -$260k net worth is going to be positive?

A lot of the things you are mentioning mean nothing. They may mean something emotional to you, but relevance wise, they means little to nothing.

What are his terms of repayment? You have to remember going to trial over this is going to cost you money too and there is no promise you will win. What happens if it is in his favour and then you are ruled to pay his court costs?

Unless you have HARD evidence that he is hiding income or living above what his reported income is, this could prove to be expensive for you. Are you familiar with cases that it was ruled that no retro expenses were owed because it would be seen as strictly a transfer of wealth from one parent to the other? How old are these expenses we are talking about if you want a lump sum of $5000 and then monthly payments for the next 5 years...
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:53 PM
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If he provided his NOA and form 13 you should have a pretty clear idea if he is living above his means. A house gives him nothing unless it's sold so him owning one is probably irrelevant. Going on vacation again proves nothing. You should be asking for proof that his expenses are legitimate.

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Old 03-19-2014, 07:24 PM
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There is a new site called "Frostrating" you should check it out as it has lots of valuable information on FRO.

Your matter will likely end up with FRO anyhow, particularly if you don't have alot of money. FRO will enforce court orders and make him complete detailed financial statements. Then you can submit all the incriminating evidence you want directly to FRO and they will decide what is relevant and what isn't.
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Old 03-19-2014, 08:56 PM
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Yes, why not just have FRO take your case? Then they are the ones who come up with a reasonable payback schedule and they decide whether he can afford x amount on top of his regular payments. If he doesn't come to an agreement with them, then the can take action against him
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