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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 01-15-2015, 11:11 AM
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So now preparing for a settlement conference. We had filed the motion tomchange and followed all the correct steps. Ex did not respond vut at the last minute engaged a lawyer to come and ask for an extension. Of course being family Law they gave him one and so we can expect the response in a couple of weeks.

But the judge gave her direction to go ahead and book either a settlement conference or a court date cor the motion.

She has now sent a Offer to Settle which has been ignored complelety. So she has now booked a Settlement Conference.

Questions:
1. In the SC brief do we have to stay with basically the same worsing as the Case Conference or can we introduce new evidence and new ideas on the issue at hand
2. We were told we needed to serve and file the Settlement Brief 7 days before the date. Does that mean we do not need to let the other party know about it until then.
3. Can the offer for the Settlement Brief be the same as the offer we sent out vut was ignored?
4 .Once we get his response we fully expect he will use this platform to drag up all sorts of other "issues" so will that then ultimately change our Settlement Brief and we will need to deal with those things as well or can we state that this motion is to deal with this particular financial isse and suggest tabling the other issues to maybe mediation where they would be more suited to.

Trying not to bring in a lawyer because ultimately the amount of money she is asking for in arrears would be lost if we engage a Lawyer.

Last edited by Beachnana; 01-15-2015 at 11:12 AM. Reason: Added a sentence
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Old 04-16-2015, 10:28 PM
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What happened with this Beachnana?

I now have a settlement conf schedule so starting to wonder the same questions.
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Old 04-17-2015, 09:58 AM
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Well that is a good question. As I said we sent an offer, but had not received any response. So I started work on the SC. The deadline for the response came and went so at first we said let just go to motion, as the judge had directed us we could do.

But I had a sneaky suspicion that they may have filed the response at the court house and served us by mail. I was right! They also claimed they sent a response to the offer, by mail but could not show proof and it was never received at our end.

So we read the response and it was a nightmare! Full of lies and incorrect details mixed stories etc. but at the end there was a " cross motion" ( i think that is what it was called)to dismiss the motion with full cost to ex based on the fact she had not disclosed her Financial Satement Form 13 and her T4 for 2014 was more than she had declared during the year ( unexpected bonus) for purposes of calculating section 7 expenses. (2%) difference amounting to $191. But nevertheless I was a little worried that the motion would get dismissed on a simple technicality and we would be stuck with the high priced lawyers bill, so we went back to our lawyer and asked him to take care of it.

That was end of February. We are now in the process of letters and calculations going back and forth and it is taking for ever - of course! His lawyer is milking the pricess to spend the retainer before he settles!

However, lots of financial details have come to light, as ex had to provide his own T4 and surprise surprise he had understated his income for the past 3 years and not only does he owe more Section 7 expenses but also he owes a chunk of money for CS!

So the $191 mistake he pointed out will hopefully cost him a lot!

So although it has cost us a bit of money to engage legal counsel we are still ahead of the game at this point.

In answer to my questions

My daughter was told by her lawyer that she could have made changes to her position in her SC, based on her ex's response. She could have acknowledged the % difference due to her income level and also agreed or disagreed on any of his points brought up in the response. He said that the SC would be to determine if the 2 parties had been able to settle any or all of the issues.

We also learned that it is important to wait for the response before filing the brief, as we would have completely hit by his request to dismiss.

We also learned, as many here have, that Family Law is a living sole and that rules are very fluid. You can never know what a judge would decide. For sure deadlines are a joke and lawyers know that.
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Old 04-23-2015, 01:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
Questions:
1. In the SC brief do we have to stay with basically the same worsing as the Case Conference or can we introduce new evidence and new ideas on the issue at hand
You are not limited and can raise new matters. Keep in mind, at the end of the conference, SCB's are given back to the parties.

Quote:
2. We were told we needed to serve and file the Settlement Brief 7 days before the date. Does that mean we do not need to let the other party know about it until then.
Correct. It just means that seven days before the settlement conference date, you need to give the other side a copy and then file it with the Court so the judge can have a read of it before the conference.

Quote:
3. Can the offer for the Settlement Brief be the same as the offer we sent out vut was ignored?
Yup.

Quote:
4 .Once we get his response we fully expect he will use this platform to drag up all sorts of other "issues" so will that then ultimately change our Settlement Brief ..
If you are the Applicant, then you need to file your SCB first. You do not get to change it after you have served and filed it, regardless of what he says in his SCB.

Quote:
Trying not to bring in a lawyer because ultimately the amount of money she is asking for in arrears would be lost if we engage a Lawyer.
Not necessarily. The Court can award costs in a matter. Costs relating to child support Orders can be enforced (collected) by FRO. The risk is that sometimes the Court will not award costs, even if a party is successful.
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Old 04-23-2015, 09:08 AM
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Beachnana...why isn't your daughter / son posting here instead of the 3rd person post???? It's hard to read and follow your posts
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Old 04-23-2015, 10:10 PM
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Mom is a full-time Mom and full-time wage earner. I joined this forum to do research as a support for her.

I am of the opinion that, as many have stated here, it takes a village to raise a child and I am one of the villagers! I research and then pass on what I know or have found out to my daughter who, with or without a lawyer, makes her decisions.

Thijs forum is helpful,myes, but it also can be time consuming a become a little overwhelming. When I look at post from LF32 with 0000's of comments and details. It becomes almost too much in ones life. As a mother I wish the best for my children, so I do what I can to make their lives the best. I am excellent at information gathering and so,that is one thing I can do for her.

At first I posted in the singular, but got flack from others, as I was the Grandmother. So,now I post in 3 rd person. Hence the confusion.
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Old 04-24-2015, 01:19 PM
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So as the grandmother and doing what is best for your daughter, are you advising her to think of your grand kids i.e. for them to turn out all rounded with 2 parents in their lives, by her putting her personal agenda aside, and be willing to parent together with her ex?????

This is what any rational grandmother / grandfather will do
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Old 04-24-2015, 04:59 PM
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She actually does not have a Personal agenda. Nor do I. Dad has always had the right and the ability to parent. He does, however, have a financial obligation to support. Which he has chosen not to do and instead has spent his money on lawyers to avoid what is any parents legal responsibility, as defined in FL, which is to contribute towards daycare based on their true annual income. Daycare for the purposes of working to keep a roof over their heads, food on the table and clothes for a growing child.

Any parents ability to be part of a childs life is their own choice and on our part. (mine as an grandparent and my daughter as the decision maker) has never been related to any financial issues that have been persistent.

I guess its up to each individual how they manage their time, their money and their priorities. Life can get in the way of what might be good intentions. There is always something else that needs taking care of and if a person chooses to put that before seeing their child. Well, the old saying comes to mind - "you can take a horse to the trough but you cannot force it to drink".

On a side note my Grandson does have another set of Grandparents who have never contacted him, never asked to see him, never sent a card or a gift. When asked for pictures for his room, never sent them. Never sent their email, so Skype could be set up. Are you suggesting I should call them up and make them grandparent?
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Old 04-24-2015, 05:33 PM
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Beachnana, don't feed the troll.

Why am I getting the feeling that slughead is back??
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Old 04-25-2015, 12:42 AM
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Thank you. I was becoming defensive. I looked at past posts and someone else had commented how negative some of this poster posts were. I come here for adivce and some direction. Its nice to get some " non involved" perspective on things. Then someone hits you from behind! Kinda of scary!
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